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Original poster

Annoyed with colleagues comment

119 replies

Cluelessfirstimer · 24/05/2026 19:05

Been at my job for 10 years. We went fully remote during covid. I relocated. Not a million miles away from the office, but a good 2 hr commute and a pretty hefty train fare.

Anyway 2 years ago they changed from fully remote to 2/3 days in the office a week. 2 days for certain roles and 3 days for more collaborative roles. Its not a strict rule, if you have plumbers or appointments in a week they dont mind if you dont hit that. Its not particularly checked.

I had a chat with my boss and said I wouldnt be able to do this. They agreed that given my role (think like a dev type role. I have very little collaboration) and the fact they really needed me, and I moved during the time they were remote this wouldnt apply to me.

I go into the office about 2 times a month. Sometimes less sometimes a little bit more. Whenever I am needed for an in person meeting im there.

Anyway sorry a lot of waffle! As I was leaving Friday a colleague commented "oh there goes 'Sally' finishing her hobby job" I turned and said what and they said "oh nothing just your special treatment" or something like that.

I was livid but was running out the door. I have been doing this for the last few years and the person who said this lives a 11 minute walk from the office and as far as I know hasnt asked about flexibility needs or wants it.

Should I say something Tuesday? Leave it? I can take a joke but the tone really bothered me.

OP posts:
Groobey · 24/05/2026 19:07

Honestly, lots of people will be thinking the same thing, that you chose to move away and now get special treatment.

So whilst this person actually said something, others will no doubt be talking about it and if you confront the individual, it would look worse on you. Just ignore the comments and carry on as normal.

Overtheatlantic · 24/05/2026 19:09

I’m the type that would send an email to this person and let them know that you are happy to have a conversation with them about their concerns with your working hours, just to make sure they have clarity. Then let them freak out that you directly and confidently handled the situation.

FlamingoFloss · 24/05/2026 19:10

I’d ignore. Not your circus, not your monkey’s. Just do you x

Plsudb · 24/05/2026 19:10

You’ll have to ignore it but make a note that this colleague is rude. That said, you are lucky that you get that flexibility - moving away during COVID was a risky thing to do IMO.

PinkFrogss · 24/05/2026 19:10

It wasn’t right for her to say and it’s none of her business but I would just ignore it. If you turn it into a big thing and she goes complaining your boss might find it easier to just make you come into the office more often.

ScaryM0nster · 24/05/2026 19:10

You are getting special treatment. Which will frustrate some people. Realistically you need to live with that or adjust things so you aren’t in a role that relies on you having an individual arrangement.

Offherrockingchair · 24/05/2026 19:12

If your colleagues are doing a disproportionate amount of work that happens in the office, on site, walk ins, immediate things like answering the door, I can see why they’d be pissed off at your effectively opting out of the normal office duties that are usually shared. And your manager will have a problem if others ask for the same treatment! I’d be bringing you back into the office quick smart to ensure parity for the rest of the team!

DisrobeDatrobe · 24/05/2026 19:14

I agree with sending an email.

"Hi Sarah, I wanted to follow up on your comment about my 'hobby job' on Friday. I appreciate this was said in jest, but I found it hurtful as I give 100% to this job. My working pattern has been agreed with my manager, and I'd ask that this is respected moving forwards. Kind regards, Clueless.

Original poster
Cluelessfirstimer · 24/05/2026 19:16

This person is known to rub people up the wrong way.

I have said to my manager numerous times if anything needs to change let me know and I would look for another job as its not a possibility for me.

My "department" is a sole department. There is nobody else in my role or area so its not like anyone is able to say im not doing the work (which i am and then some!) Or they are having to pick up any slack. This person is in no way even close to my area of the business.

OP posts:
Error404FucksNotFound · 24/05/2026 19:19

You are getting special treatment.
This is because you are important enough to the company for them to work to accommodate you rather than lose you.

Dont say that to her, obviously. Just think it to yourself and smile when she makes a dig.

Growingaseed · 24/05/2026 19:20

You are getting special treatment. Most people didn't move two hours away from their jobs and expect to still have them when the world inevitably reverted back to normal.

Maybe you work hard out the office maybe you don't but realistically most the people their won't know either way as they barely see you.

I think you would be wrong to confront the person about it belatedly. You would need to have said something at the time and the moment has passed now.

Happymountains · 24/05/2026 19:22

It is very likely that others will resent the flexibility you've been offered because you chose to live 2 hours from the office. They might want to be at home more too, and the fact the rules have been relaxed for you and not them may seem unfair to them. Can you not see that some people might feel this way? It's quite obvious human nature. She shouldn't have been passive aggressive about feeling this way though.

Original poster
Cluelessfirstimer · 24/05/2026 19:26

Growingaseed · 24/05/2026 19:20

You are getting special treatment. Most people didn't move two hours away from their jobs and expect to still have them when the world inevitably reverted back to normal.

Maybe you work hard out the office maybe you don't but realistically most the people their won't know either way as they barely see you.

I think you would be wrong to confront the person about it belatedly. You would need to have said something at the time and the moment has passed now.

I didnt really expect to keep it though. I moved, then when things changed I had a frank conversation with my boss that its not viable for me to come into the office and as such I would need to look for something else.

Thats when we agreed the current set up. I didnt actually ask or demand it.

Also if "Sarah" wants to be at home more maybe she needs to speak to her manager about flexible working and not make sly digs at me?

Im still torn about what to do - part of me thinks no fuck it im sending an email. The other half is like just let it go and move on...

OP posts:
KellsBells7 · 24/05/2026 19:26

Theres always resentment when different rules are applied to different people. I’m more surprised something was said to your face rather than behind your back. Just ignore.

Whyarentyoureadyyet · 24/05/2026 19:27

I still can't get my head round people moving during COVID and expecting special treatment and 0 resentment

YoBetty · 24/05/2026 19:28

You aren't getting 'special treatment'. You have negotiated employment conditions which suit you, and you are an asset to the company so they were happy to agree to those terms.

I'd be going to stand in front of his desk next time, put my hands flat down on his desk and say "Don't you ever speak to me like that again you pipsqueak, this is not a hobby job and my employment contract is none of your fucking business. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

pikkumyy77 · 24/05/2026 19:28

ScaryM0nster · 24/05/2026 19:10

You are getting special treatment. Which will frustrate some people. Realistically you need to live with that or adjust things so you aren’t in a role that relies on you having an individual arrangement.

Its not special treatment its just treatment.

TinyMouseTheatre · 24/05/2026 19:29

I’m not sure why you’ve been so upset by the comments. If the rest of the staff have to come into the office more, it’s natural that there will be some resentment about your special treatment. You would be naive to think otherwise.

Bigminnie1 · 24/05/2026 19:29

Please don’t send an email. You are in the right. Just ignore her. If it gets mentioned again, say this has been agreed with my manager and leave it at that.

AgnesMcDoo · 24/05/2026 19:31

Your colleague is rude and a total arsehole.

Obviously jealous.

But still an arsehole.

ignore it

Error404FucksNotFound · 24/05/2026 19:32

Dont send her an email.
You are doing your job in a way agreed between you and your employer.

You dont have to change that because other staff dont like it.

If they want the same that's for them to take up with the employer.

You'd have to be a dumb fuck to change your way of working to stop other staff members sulking when your employers have no problem with you.

Growingaseed · 24/05/2026 19:35

Those who don't think it's special treatment really need to look up the definition. It doesn't matter if you are the star employee or what you've negotiated. If you are being treated differently to the other employees then that is classed as special treatment.

OP whether or not she has asked to wfh more and been turned down or not is no more your business than your situation is for her.

Divebar2021 · 24/05/2026 19:35

Why do you care though if they’re an arsehole ? I used to get comments about being a “ part timer” because I was an actual part timer 😂. I used to say “ I know right it’s a complete liberty “ or “ hey Bob you know you could go part time too “

TeenLifeMum · 24/05/2026 19:38

My team has 2 halves and my side of the team work from home much more (in office one day a week for some of them) than the other half who are in 3-4 days. Very different roles. I’ve had comments about my team and replied “oh, I didn’t realise you’d want to do x job?” Oh but they don’t want to… so they can’t wfh then but Jane does the job perfectly from home! I will not tolerate this bs about my employees. If they have an issue with output, raise it with me as I’m the manager rather than bitch about my team. I go in 3 days a week for no actual reason but to show face then sit on teams calls 🙄

SirChenjins · 24/05/2026 19:39

Don't email her, don't address it - unless she says something again. Your flexible working arrangements are no-one else's business- they are between you and your manager, and if anyone doesn't like it they should address through their manager like a grown up rather than making snotty comments which makes them appear petty and jealous.