Worth it to double my salary?

[Heatherbell1978]

I'm in a professional role earning £70k. Mid 40s, DH, 2 DC. Only ever worked for 2 large organisations (finance). My current role is great - lots of autonomy, nice team, nice manager and I can wfh most days. Work compressed hours so I have one day a week off. Good at what I do and the job is flexible around family needs.
An ex colleague has asked me if I'm interested in applying for a role in a different organisation. They're looking for more females to address the balance apparently. It's working in a field I used to do years ago and enjoyed but moved away from when DC entered the picture - quite stressful and travel involved.

Here's the thing. It would be double my current salary (including guaranteed bonus) but...based in a city a 3 hr train journey away.

I could negotiate 1 or 2 days a week in the office apparently although I'd need to fund travel myself. Officially they ask for 3 days in the office.
DH also has a relatively big job but can wfh a lot. DC 7 and 10.
It feels like the travel would wear me down after a while. Or not? Is it worth it? WWYD?

A 3 hr train journey? So potentially 6 hrs of commuting a day, 3 times a week? Absolutely not! Sounds horrendous to me. The only way I would consider it would be if you could get it down to 1 day in the office but even then I think I’d be too knackered the rest of the week.

Can you move? That's an awful lot of money.

If they offered you it with one day a week in the office I would take their hand off, doing the commute once a week would be ok, you could work on the train. What does your DH think?

3hr commute, no thanks, not for me.

If you do decide to go for it get it in your contract it is only 1-2 days maximum, I've seem people stung with verbal agreements before.

Hi, you’ll know what a difference the money would make for you on a practical level, but evidence suggests well-being and happiness don’t increase with extra income after about 40K

Or you would have to stay in London overnight. is that an option?

Guess it is about what is more important - money or time??? If you spend it all on therapy and divorce what is the point? If you can still have family time and a great marriage and love the job then go for it.

hard decisions. good Luck. (although an initial conversation with the company loses you nothing)

The line that jumps out is "They're looking for more females to address the balance" and I would have a lot of questions about their workplace culture and how it's got to a stage where they suddenly realise they need women :/

3 hours each way or 1.5 each way? Either would be a No from me.
And there no such thing as a guaranteed bonus.

We can't move. Very settled where we are. I wouldn't do a 6 hr commute in one day - it would need to involve a night away. So for example getting train down later on Sunday night then coming back on Monday night after a full day in office. The train station, office and Premier Inn are all in close proximity to each other.
There are a few people that work there in my current city and do the commute/stay over so it's an established thing by looks of it.

If you could ravel in one day, stay overnight and home next day that might be worth it (depending on the cost once you add the tax at higher rate etc.

But if I'm honest the only way I would do that would be if I could travel in Tuesday and come home Wednesday, or weds to Thursday.

Think about it this way. Would you do the job you have, and take a side hustle for another £70k if it meant doing the side hustle Sunday eve, Monday eve, and whatever else you’d be out the house extra. How many hours exactly is this, and therefore aren’t they just paying you to double your hours??

I would say no. You likely can’t spend all the money you’re pulling in between you, so why lose valuable time with the children? You could do this in 10 years. I’d say exactly the same to a man. They’re only little for a little time. And it sounds like you have an excellent job already all things considered.

I'd seriously consider it for a year or two if it would improve your cv/prospects and there was the chance to look for a similar role close to home once you had the experience.

I do a 2.5hr each way commute by car twice a week and it’s very tough. Don’t think you could pay me enough to spend 6 hours a day on public transport.

Nope wouldn't go near it - stupid commute, they are having issues recruiting women/more diverse workforce (wonder why), nothing is set in stone re work location etc
vs
what sounds like a cushty number even if salary lower - the balance of work life sounds great

How old are the children? How independent are they ? How flexible are your partner's working arrangements.

With teens, and a night away if consider it, but not younger kids. And maybe not exam year kids.

No chance. I'd want a lot more than that and I don't even have kids. You'll regret it within a week.

But you could use it to negotiate a pay increase at your current place.

DH thinks I should seriously consider it but I don't think he realises the mental load I carry. I worry less about the practicalities of travel and more about juggling it all. I have one day a week at the moment to catch up with everything which I'd lose plus the night away. He said he'd do it if it was him but then I think that's different given I organise everything!
The job itself would be interesting but a change in direction. Whether it would help my career prospects I don't know as I've had multiple careers within finance in 20 years - bit of a jack of all trades.
In the organisation I'm in now this salary would likely be for levels 2 grades above so it's not a salary I could realistically move back to doing what I do now. This role is quite niche and just happens to be something I have experience in from years back. Not many jobs in it where I am now.

Given the flakiness of trains in so many parts of the country if you seriously think it's worth it could you stay over? You will be exhausted and burnt out in a month if you don't.

And if your kids are little remember you can't get that time back.

I mean it's an extra £130ish a day after tax, which you'd end up spending on train fares those days you're commuting I'd imagine (guessing train prices from where I am to London which is equal distance) so not really worth it when you think of it that way. One day a week, bearable, but any more would be a no from me

I’ve been through a similar dilemma and my advice is this opportunity has come a few years too early. Right now you have flexibility while your children are young. Plenty of time to lean in and earn more when they are older teens.

Hold your nerve, be honest with your contact that it’s an appealing offer but not the right time, and explore in 5-10 years (if you’re still ambitious to earn more and take on a bigger job then).

I woukd do it but get everything set up so it runs smoothly.

Always the same two office days with a night in Premier Inn, I know a few people who negotiate good deals with hotels for regular booking

Get a tablet and use train time for work and life admin

Get a cleaner

Get a decent luggage set and noise cancelling headphones to make travel less to a pain

That's pretty much what I figured out.

You'd get approx £700 a week extra and you'd have to find trains, hotel overnight and eating out.

So maybe £400 a week.

Yeah it's £1.2k ish a month in your pocket but that's then for 4 extra days work to what your doing now.

So really it's whether for you as a family taking everything into account that figure is worth it.

No. Normally I would say go for it but it sounds logistically impossible.

However, sounds like you are being underpaid where you are. Maybe you could use this offer to negotiate at your current job.

If they expect three days a week in the office and you, as a newbie only offers up one or two, you will get noticed for all the wrong reasons pretty quickly, I'm afraid.

I would probably wait for secondary school age, when it may be easier to do two days with an overnight, plus a day trip. But I understand, it may not come up again