WFH with kids - do you do it?

[vanillawaffle]

Do you go and pick up your kid from school and then come back and work for a couple of hours? Does that work out OK for you? Do your bosses mind? I'm wondering if it would work when my little one is 5

Not where I work. Policy is that you can’t work from home if your children are there. Everyone uses after school clubs. You can’t work effectively with children around.

My partner does this while working for our LA. He does both school runs most days for our youngest, and makes the time up by working half an hour extra at the beginning and end of the day.

His manager is fine with this, and flexible working is a heavily promoted perk, but we would be able to use the schools breakfast/after school club if anything changed. The only real downside is that there is usually a lot of screen time for our dc.

Yes i do but my work are ok with it as long as it doesn’t impact my work.

Most of us have to do it at some point, managers, and board included, and my work have the attitude of family first. If I’m WFH and it’s holidays I try and get clubs and grandparent help but if I can’t I am ok to work around their needs.

it’s much easier for me these days as mine are 9.5 and 13 but I’ve been working this easy for a long time and not made a a hash of things.

I sometimes do it with my 10 and 8 year olds but not with my 5 year old.

Depends on age. In reality 10+
I have issues with staff that when child is sick, they want to WFH. Ages 2+. I refuse as to me the child needs looking after and no different with after school. I give them carers leave but once run out of allowance, it is take annual leave.
They cannot work properly when a child wants attention, feeding etc

So to me the same rule applies

I think it’s crap for the kids tbh, especially a 5 year old. I would rather pay for after school club, where they run around with their friends/do craft activities, than stick them in front of a screen at home because I’m trying to work.

Yes 100% this is the second company I work for that is normal. Both are American so it might be a cultural thing... Nothing in the contract says anything about not doing it.

That and cats... You see so many cat butts too!

I pay for wraparound, I think it’s really unfair on kids (primary age) to be left to fend for themselves for a couple of hours. It does seem common at my work though, it’s hard to arrange meetings or phone anyone around 3pm. The wraparound is used sparsely at our school too, I worry that they might close it, so sadly I think it must be very common. Y6+ I think it’s fine, at that age I’d have been walking home to an empty house.

My 10 and 8 year olds don’t sit in front of a screen. They come home, make themselves a snack, read, draw, paint, play in the garden, play upstairs together, all the stuff they would do after school if I wasn’t working.

My husband does it occasionally but my kids are 8 and 10 so more self sufficient. He only does it once a month or less so not regularly

Mine goes to after school club. You need wrap around care unit they are about 8-9 I think.

I always thought it was risky too, as meetings and calls overrun and I couldn't always guarantee being able to run out dead on 3pm. I wouldn't want to be panicking and/or being late collecting from school.

Yes same. Works well from us and work are ok with this

I once had to take a phone call from a company.....operator had a kid in the background and when she was talking she kept trying to pass the kid stuff

I asked her if she was WFH. She confirmed so I refused to take the call any further. Bloody insulting they want your money but can't give you their attention.

My work would mind at that age, if they need supervision then you can’t work at the same time. My dd will be starting school in September, she’ll go to after school club on the days I work until she’s old enough to be able to get home herself and entertain herself for a bit, probably age 10.

I think under 8's need to be in childcare.

I do with my 5yo. My work is extremely flexible (this goes in both directions though) and task based rather than time. Either the content is ready or it's not. Except for my busiest time of year (run up to xmas), I usually play with ds after school. We do stop by the park after school every day, it's right outside, lots of his friends go. Maybe answer the odd email on my phone. When I do have to work, I organise my schedule so it's stuff that I can talk through and is easily interrupted, low concentration.

I'm sure my boss would take issue if it became a problem with deadlines.

People advocating for after school clubs - this wouldn't work for us. Ds is extremely sensitive (but NT) and wouldn't cope. He's also sick a huge amount of the time so is off a lot anyway (awaiting tonsillectomy). But he's very happy doing puzzles, homework, and playing independently (in the same room as me) now too, as he knows I'm there to chat, feed, water, cuddle, etc if he wants.

Dd (2yo) does go to full time nursery, collected at 5. She's made of much healthier stuff, and I'd have no chance of emails or after school work with her here. Not least because she's obsessed with breastfeeding.

5yrs is probably too young. They'd need tea or a snack at least and want to interact with you and not really safe or able to occupy themselves at that age. It might make a difference depending on what your job is - could you log off and then back on when they're in bed to make sure you work the hours?

Personally I'm not a fan of WFH. A lot of my colleagues do it and I always think it's unprofessional when children can be heard in the background even when they've got a partner who is doing the caring, however we handle confidential information and I would hate to talk to a family about concerns of their children while they could hear mine in the background. I think it's cruel. Maybe it depends on your role 🤔

Not fair on the child or your employer
The main reason we revoked WFH as the productivity between 3 and 5 pm (over 1/4 of the working day was appalling

Our work policy says you can't use wfh/hybrid working as a sub for childcare.

My DD never went back to wrap around care after lockdown, she was a mature y4. In y5 she and friends started working to/from school on their own (we can spit on the school from our house!) and she could entertain herself for an hour after school.

I also changed jobs from a "work til you get it done" job that often meant "until at least 9pm" to one where I'd be finished at 4/5 every day.

But generally I think 8 is pushing it, 9/10 is much more realistic. Definitely not a 5 yr old, they need too much from you.

No, after school my 6 year old wouldn’t be happy for me to ignore her. We use wraparound care on a couple of days and other days I finish working early to pick her up.

I take it everyone who is so sanctimonious about this is on a high/dual income and can’t imagine the money saved on childcare might be the difference for some families between keeping a roof over their heads or not.

DS is 5 and prefers to play or chill on his own after school for an hour. He seems to enjoy the downtime, but it is only for about an hour and only once every week or two. He does an hour of after school club once or twice a week.

I WFH with him in school holidays. He knows the alternative is holiday club, which he tried and hated. My working day is only 6 hours and my boss only really cares that the work gets done and that I am there to answer the phone until 3.30pm.

DS has his own desk in my office, which he will happily draw, write, or craft at for a few hours. I also have a futon in my office, which he can sit on to watch a movie if he fancies. I always start early on WFH days and take a couple of hours at lunch to play with him.

I actually think 5 is fine for a couple of hours if you are in the same house. Our 5 year old is happy to go downstairs and watch TV at the weekend while we have a bit of lie-in, and is absolutely fine, so after school wouldn't when they are ready to chill out shouldn't be a big issue. Just set them up with some snacks and they would be fine.

Most parents on the school run at my DC's school (myself included) are rushing back home to log back on, it's perfectly normal these days. My employer, at least, is fully aware of me doing this, and have no problem with it - as long as your work is getting done a good employer shouldn't really care. Maximum flexibility keeps (especially) women with young children in work.

I know some people who do because wraparound care is so limited here, especially for Reception. We were thankfully able to get the last space with a childminder (not my preference). One single mum I know nearly lost her job because she had to WFH to pick up her child.

School told us when we looked around that where was plenty of wraparound care. My advice would be to call the schools you're most likely to get into and get yourself on their lists NOW.

Edited to add - I do it occasionally if childminder is ill and it's not great. Some days he'll play with his Lego or draw, but usually he's restless and needs a screen to stay quiet enough for me to work. Not ideal for anyone.

I had to as DD was 5 during Covid lockdown and honestly it was a total nightmare, she was not old enough to entertain herself while I worked, it was impossible to fully concentrate on either her or work and it just meant I ended up doing a lot of catch up work when she was in bed.

She's 9, nearly 10 now and it's fine. I would say from 8 I have been able to pick her up from school and she's done any homework, got herself a snack, played or listened to music and read while I finished up my working day.