My friend who also WFH wants us to work alongside one another

[Lorelai007]

I recently made a new friend with another mum who, like me, also works from home while she sends her DD to nursery. We've socialised a couple times, and I enjoy her company, but she's just asked me if I would be interested in working alongside one another on weekdays to create more of an office environment. I'm really not too keen on this idea, since I like coming back to my own home after dropping DS off at nursery, then I clean and do laundry while listening to a podcast, relax with a coffee on my balcony, then I stick my headphones on and do some work in between cooking and other household chores. Sometimes if I'm really tired I have an afternoon nap, or even a small glass of wine while reading my book before it's time to go and collect DS. I'm a bit of an introvert and during the week I like to be in my own space without interruption, it's how I recharge after spending all evening and morning and the weekend taking care of my active 3 year old son. I told my husband my reasons for not wanting to hang out with my friend on weekdays, and preferring to stay home alone, and he just laughed and jokingly said how I hate other people. This isn't true, I just can't function being in someone else's company for an entire day and then having to entertain my DS. I don't want to jeopardise my friendship, but I have no idea how to politely decline her suggestion. Also, we have completely different jobs and I need two monitors to work, plus my office is too small to accommodate the both of us.

My DH works from home and was, like you, having an afternoon tipple. Just one to start.... but then two... and three.

And then we had to talk about his alcohol dependency.

Drinking alone mid afternoon pre nursery/school collection isn't great.

Co-working and having "accountability buddies" is very very normal in my industry: this is everything from people who don't work together renting shared office spaces together; people arranging to meet in coffee shops to do a working session together; and companies/organisations arranging sessions (not for their own employees, but for anyone who would find it useful) where people can come and work together, and these sessions happen both over Zoom and in public places. At least once or twice a week some company or other will announce that they're hosting a public co-working Zoom that anyone in our industry is welcome to join just to have a bit of digital company while they're working, and to help them keep focus (the idea being that you won't be tempted to wander off and put the telly on if 20 people can see you on a Zoom screen).

Of course the OP doesn't have to say yes if she's not into it, or if it doesn't work for her. It sounds like there's no way such an arrangement would suit her, so she should absolutely feel okay about saying no. I personally hate in-person co-working. But there are industries where it's the norm.

Saying "chez nous" makes it sound so much more respectable, non?

This is why many places don't want their staff working from home.

Wow I need your job is it part time? No just say you get more done on your own....solo drinking would worry me.

I personally don't drink except on special occasions, but my job would let me do all of those things if I wanted, and I still work hard and am regarded as a hard worker. In some jobs the quality of the final product is the only thing that matters, not clocking a certain number of hours. And unfortunately not every job does effort/time spent=quality/results. I wish it did, because it would make my life a lot easier.

Having said that, obviously jobs that let you take naps and stuff during the daytime are pretty damn rare, extremely desirable/competitive, and in my experience you usually have to have proven yourself to a high level to be able to land one. I can think of a couple of exceptions but it's still rare.

Solo drinking, are we only allowed to drink in company? bit judgy

It’s a simple thanks . I gave it some thought - it wouldn’t work .

Are you part time ? I can’t get over how much you do - that’s not work related ?

reading a book with a glass of wine ? Have you finished work by then . I wouldn’t dream of drinking at work ever.

Yes I suppprt my staff also but I also support the organisation I work for.
If they are being paid to do 7 hours a day I certainly don't condone them working for 2 3 or 4 !
I know the ones in my team who work and the ones who don't because I monitor outputs. That's my job to ensure outputs are met.
We have outputs to meet so I certainly don't support staff doing their housework all day and not delivering on outputs.

@Jammylou

I specifically said they get the work done to a good standard which means getting their outputs done.

So we agree on something.

Again: not everyone has a job that requires working X hours or are paid an hourly rate. There are plenty of jobs where you are paid per project and it's completely your own business how many hours you take to complete that project.

And plenty of people don't have jobs that involve managers or anyone monitoring them.

It's a bit of a fudge, really. I'm contracted to work X hours a week, and I arrange my week around doing those X hours (partly from home). But I think it's a question of managing your energy and focus as much as anything. I know I'll get more done in a day if I break it up with exercise, conversation, even (at home) to get my guitar out for fifteen minutes! That's better for my employer than me slumped in a chair for 8 hours losing the will to live, and then get a headache the next day. So I technically do my contracted hours, but I know I get more done on a shorter day than a longer day.

As I've not yet seen an update from her, maybe she's a journalist - perhaps doing book reviews? A friend is a journo (not books), and so has a very mixed schedule. Sometimes frantic for a deadline, then much quieter, so she can do the podcasts & chores, then the next article request arrives & she's back to working to a deadline. Jobs as a whole vary hugely

I would imagine, reading it again, it’s not actually true and is just a wind up.