Can't hold down a job. Very low.

[Effed]

Please be gentle with me, I am very tender and am seriously considering how black/bleak my future looks.

I had a head injury inc brain bleed 18 months ago.

I've been a teacher for years.

I had to leave my job because I couldn't be off sick forever & when I tried to go back, my employer put me on capability. My union argued it, to no avail.

I was devastated.

I have been working at temporary jobs since, but nothing sticks.
Today I have a letter from my latest temporary job, saying that they are reviewing my probation. It's not looking good for me.

I'm feeling very low, thinking is difficult since my head injury. I feel really frustrated with myself, but I can't make myself well, or make my mind think properly.

What the heck do I do for a job now?
I'm clearly not up to Teaching any more.

To reiterate, I am devastated.

@geminiflanagan tutoring is something that I would love to do, establishing myself may be a challenge, but I will give it a shot. Thank you for your advice.

@seekingasimplelife and @daisypond in my last post I should have said that I have changed my Union. This was because my original one were so terrible after my accident.

Thank you @chopc, I've always worked and, as soon as I was able, I started again. I don't know how else to be!
Though again, on days like today I can't work, it's as much as I can do to get through the day.
Thank you for saying (writing) so kindly.
My childhood was difficult.
From a very young age I had to work, and fight, for everything. I'm not sure that I know how to stop!
When your life has been a series of battles, you think learn to think tactically and fight for everything.
Even in the midst of this hideous accident, it didn't occur to me to give up.

@Reallybadatdecisions I would love to train other teachers, it is something that I have explored.
The downside is that it is cerebrally demanding and, whether PGDE or ITT, there is a lot of marking, visiting student teachers etc.

Again, I'm good at the practical side.
I can walk into a classroom and demonstrate - this is how you grab them and keep them.

The thought of marking dozens of post-grad essays about classroom practice? That's the bit that puts me off.

I'm not being dismissive, it's a great idea if it didn't require so much brain power on my part!

I think you're being really hard on yourself. I had a very mini stroke last summer and am still recovering despite it really being very mild.

Have you support Headway, I think the brain injury charity is called) and applied for PIP?

Could you branch into something linked with teaching but not actively teaching?

I'm sorry I can't make any positive suggestions. Please try not to get too stressed, things will improve.

Sorry, should have RTFT.

@Namechange285 I have had neuro rehab and, to a lesser degree, I still have some.

I've contacted ACAS and my Union, I am waiting to hear back from both of them.

Today was going to be my day of contacting charities, unfortunately today has been a wash-out, there is always tomorrow.

I would love to work for a charity, though I know that competition is fierce, if you have any tips I am eager to hear them.

If I was going to teach online, which again is something that I would consider, it would need to be part time. Again, I would be interested to learn about any opportunities.

Thank you @OriginalUsername2 I'm looking into it now.

@RattlewhenIwalk please don't apologise, they are good suggestions and much appreciated.

Don't feel that you have to RTFT, it is long and there's a lot of me rambling on

How are you now?

I recently left teaching and joined the Environment Agency. I have met many ex teachers some who used to teach geography and science which is an obvious transition but also an ex-primary school teacher who now works in communications. There is a big push on Equality, Diversity and Inclusion with a focus on neuro diversity and disability and there are several hybrid and WFH roles available, as a teacher you will have lots of experience working with children who have dyslexia, Adhd and autism etc. In the relatively short time I have been at the EA I can say that the organisational culture is very much based on keeping staff happy and Inclusion and trying to be the best employer. There are grumbles on pay etc which is set by the govt but day to day the focus really is on physical and mental wellbeing.

I've only read your post so I don't know if it's been mentioned but you sound like what I call a decent teacher and by that I mean your care about your students, have you considered Youth Work or supporting care leavers type of role?

@Effed I'm ok but I get physically and mentally tired quite quickly. I work 4 days which is a struggle even though it's a desk job. Don't underestimate the amount of effort needed to sit on a chair (and obviously think and drive a keyboard!).

I'm thinking of dropping another day as there's more to life than work but there's the financial impact😔

www.tes.com/jobs/employer/king-s-interhigh-online-school-1252466

Online English teacher role

@Effed One thing I noticed early on is that you said that your Cv said 'teacher teacher teacher' and you were worried about that. It might be worth experimenting with a skills based CV instead of a chronological one and seeing if that helps. I am sure there are lots of website pages that will give advice on this, I found one on the Open University.

Also this happened many, many years ago and the employment scene is totally different now but my dad suffered brain damage in a car accident before I was born which meant he had to relearn how to speak, dress, tie shoelaces, read and write etc. He couldn't hold down his previous job any more in the Merchant Navy which required complex thinking. He left and after a little while found a job with the then Water Board (now a water company). The important thing for him was working outdoors and interacting with customers. He absolutely loved it and did it until the day he died.

Once you also identify a new role that has the most important elements you need and love, you should find future fulfilment and a whole new adventure.

(Also you write beautifully. I could see you writing about teaching in some way...)

Good luck @Effed . It's very unfortunate that your union have been less than ideal in helping you navigate this at such a difficult and stressful time. I must admit I've heard similar stories.
If you are able to afford it, I would advise a few sessions with a solicitor specialising in employment law. They are likely to take a much more robust line and give you clear options and an appraisal of possible outcomes, rather than the conciliatory approach.
I would also look for specialist advice on the TP scheme. Wesleyan Assurance do this - (depending on which union you are a member of, it might be offered for free). Their advice on the TP is excellent and very knowledgeable, without any obligation or pressure to buy their financial products.

@Singleandproud thank you, I had no idea that the EA were so forward thinking, that is very useful to know.

This is a bit of a tangent; for a while now I have wondered about taking an accredited Equality, Diversity and Inclusion course myself. I've never wanted to break into HR, though it is my understanding that E, D, I is separate in some companies.

If anyone can confirm or refute this, please do.

If it is necessary, I'm wondering whether I could take some HR qualifications, maybe level 3 or 4 would be sufficient as a backup to my preference of EDI.

Being entirely honest, I don't want to do HR at all, for a start, I think that the name Human Resources is an oxymoron I'm being facetious, to anyone who does work in HR, I salute you. It's not an easy job, I know that and then you have random idiots on the internet (specifically me), insulting your career choices,I'm sure you don't need that. I hope you will realise that I am teasing.

Thank you @Nixnjj1 I hope that I am a decent teacher, my grandmother played a formidable role in my upbringing, she taught me to always do my best by others.

Although it is a lovely idea, and I would really enjoy youth work, in common with childcare, would need me to be 'on' and not falling over or similar. That would be incredibly distressing for the young people I worked with.

This thread has helped me to distill my thoughts and realise that I'm going to need to work from home for now, or at a desk job not far from home.

Even though the thought of giving up classroom teaching makes me incredibly sad, it is just another small privation in a sea of loss.

@RattlewhenIwalk are you me? I know exactly how you feel, you start off working 5 days a week, then you find that you have to reduce that to 4 days m, then 3.

Give yourself time, be good to yourself, patient. And when you find out how to do that without feeling overwhelmingly sad, please let me know.

Seriously, you can only do what you can do. I understand the financial impact, truly I do. I also know that if you keep going then eventually you will grind to a halt and you won't be able to earn any money.

If that sounds harsh, it isn't meant to be. I'm writing that down to remind myself as just as much as you, do what you can, somehow it will be enough. If I can do anything, even if it is just be an anonymous internet person for you to vent at, then please do vent at me.

Thank you @Seaswimmingdeservessunnydays. That is very helpful.

@Staticgirl, I'm sorry for your loss. From the way you have written about him your Dad sounds brave, resourceful and honourable, after what must have been a quietly devastating time for him.

I'm sure that you are correct, that something will come to me, as it did to your Dad.

For myself, I'm aware that I am putting myself under ridiculous pressure, maybe I just need to do what (it sounds like) your Dad did and say: this is how it is now, what is available? Instead of moaning on the internet about how hard life is.

Btw @Staticgirl thank you for saying that I write beautifully, that is a lovely compliment.

On Friday I finally got hold of someone from my union. In many ways, he made it very clear that he felt that I was an annoyance as he was "concentrating his efforts on those who are facing hardships as a result of their decision to strike".

My impression was that he was frustrated as mine is not an easy-fix problem. He couldn't demand that people down tools and that would solve it.

He did also call me "comrade", I am absolutely serious, and so was he apparently.

I've been chuckling to myself at being called a comrade ever since.

If you could do online teaching, apply to Fluentify.

It's Tefl, one to one and online.

💐 I hear you! I'm many years ahead of you in regards to a life changing head injury.

My advice is, try different roles/ jobs but don't beat yourself up if it isn't working out. You are at the beginning of your journey "Living & Working" with this injury - it's a bit like being 16 again when you start working out what type of work would suit you best!
I had to give up my career as a translator as like you I struggle with concentration, computer screens and tiredness. I did work pt for a while in similar roles as my old job... but in the end, I just couldn't sustain it. I am now working in a hospital- supply & procurement. It's not a dream job, it's not a glamorous job or one that is as well paid as my pre injury job. But it's a job I am able to do full time and pays my bills. It's a very active job and helps to keep me fit! I don't have to concentrate for long periods nor stare at the computer for hours, there is very little I can mess up and if I need to take things slowly I can just do that!
I think what I am trying to say is, there is a ft job out there for you, so don't worry, despair or give up!

OP, how are things for you now? Have you made any progress.

You mention that during your career as a teacher you have worked in Special Needs (SEND) and also subject head. Were you a SENCO or was your special needs experience as part of a teaching role.

Are there any possibilities of working as some kind of consultant or in professional development (short courses for current teachers and others in schools) rather than PGCE type teacher training?

Sorry to say this OP but I really don’t think you are anywhere fit enough to work let alone work in a school with kids.