Fired yesterday now tricky boss wants 2 hour meeting!

[NotMyDust]

Very badly managed project, no busonness plan, unclear goals,anager has fallen out with a lot of people. Previous post holder walked out, his targets transferred on to me with no real handover process, losing money fast, so yesterday I was called on to. a meeting with the CEO and my line manager and "let go". I made it easy for them as the writing was in the wall for a while and I've been applying for new jobs right left and cente.

BUT line manager now wants a 2 hour meeting this morning! juat handover stuff officially I guess which part of me cba to do after being treated so badly, but otoh I am a decent human being and like to be professional.

However she has said some pretty horrid/immature stuff to me in the past eg I give her a negative feeling every time she sees me.

Please can i have some tips for how to deal with this, what to say, boundaries etc? ideally I would channel Michelle Obama rather than pissed off teenager (which is secretly how I could be triggered after everything she's put me through) .
thanks

She's fired you. Don't turn up. What's she going to do, fire you again?

"Noted." is a good one to have in your locker.

Oh and definitely camera off, you can still share documents on screen if needed but there's literally no need for her to see your face.

@akissbeforebed good point. I need to manage how my exit is portrayed with the members I have recruited I guess just in case they want to land me in it. But we agreed on a form of wording which was mutually acceptable.

it's just so unfair that a shit manager can lead you to so much hassle!! rant over. need to pick my self up ASAP. thanks again everyone.

Asking for your reference first is a good idea, also yes to having a neutral 3rd party present on the meeting.

Screw that. What can you possibly offer anyone in this meeting if you're so rubbish at your job they had to fire you? That's what I'd be saying to them anyway.

Useful phrases are "I'm sorry you feel that way....". If you're no longer part of the company then you don't owe them anything. Tell them when it's convenient for you to have said meeting.

Your suggestion that you want to be professional about it is important. While it does sound like this place is on a death spiral, the fact that they put you on garden leave for a month means either you or the information you have about this project are important to them. Perhaps you could let them know that they would get more useful information and a better wrap-up from you if they held off a week or so? You never know when and where you are going to meet again in your working life, and the next time this manager could be the person who could round-file your application or drops a quick word to HR and deny you even an interview, just based on his/her memory of how professional you were in this situation.
BTW it's likely they are under stress too, looking over their shoulder for the next cuts!
Just my €0.02

She has been given notice but isn't required to work that notice, so she's still under contract.
They could ask her to work her notice, but they're only asking her to work 2 hrs of it.
If she refused to work her notice she'd be in breach of contract and subject to legal proceedings, if they wanted to do that.
She should absolutely work the 2hrs then enjoy her months free pay.

If I’d been fired I wouldn’t do a hand over - but that’s because I’m a bitch. Two fingers to your ex employer

Sounds as though it all went fine, OP. Good luck with whatever you do next!

Hi OP, it’s sounds like you don’t owe them anything and would be well within your rights to just not go.

However, I think your instinct to channel Michelle Obama is the right one, you could treat this as a personal exercise in grace and composure.

What I would recommend is going along, being really positive and cooperative, camera on (you have nothing to hide and make sure they see you smile). If the manager is vaguely insulting or insinuates that your work is bad, pretend not to hear it and don’t get into defending yourself at all. Just keep it light, smile graciously and keep things moving. Try and focus on what’s good about this manager, be benevolent and charitable about them in your own mind, they probably know there behaviour has not been good, and that they are not very good at their job- there is no need for you to add to this- you are free!

However, draw the line at this meeting and at max 2 hours, no more contact after that. If they do get in contact you can be very positive and seem as if you might cooperate more but in reality- just don’t spend anymore time on it, tell them you’re so sorry but your new job is so busy etc etc

Imho, the aim for you should be to:

1. test yourself on how gracious you can be in a bad situation- this is a real opportunity- even if you only half succeed you will feel more empowered than if you let them see you are upset or angry

2. make it difficult for them to speak ill of you after you’re gone- a friendly and helpful final meeting will help that

3. if you bump into them again through work or socially, you want to be able to at least pretend you are happy to see them, if you go out on a negative note and they suspect hard feelings this could be difficult! But if you are positive and breezy in the last interaction, you can maintain this forever. It will make any future interactions far less stressful.

I’ve had bitter departures from jobs, and I’ve had departures which could have been bitter and I’ve put a brave face on it. I am always glad when I’ve done the latter, and people are so grateful when you don’t shame them for what they know was bad behaviour or poor form that you might find they pop up again in your career and are very much on your side. Even if they don’t though, being positive and professional is what good leaders are, so if you use this to cultivate that aspect of yourself this whole thing becomes a career growth milestone rather than something to feel uncomfortable about.

Firstly I’d record the meeting. Secondly don’t commit to any answers you’re not absolutely sure I’m, if I’m doubt just say you’ll get back to her…it’s up to you if you do. I’d also ask her to make notes of any outstanding questions and email them over so there is a paper trail. And finally I’d ask her for a reference up front!! Good luck

Glad the meeting went well. Good luck with job hunting.

Just seen your outcome OP - glad it went well and hope you get a new job soon.

Honestly if they do come crawling back asking for XYZ I'd have an answer just in case they do (had this in a job years ago where I'd left, due to bullying by one person) and I'd just say no. No more help. Wish I'd done that then but was only 19.

just a quick update, I had a call from a colleague thanking me for returning all the office equipment and she was gobsmacked I'd been fired with no process (tongues have been wagging evidently) and said she didn't want to work somewhere that treated people like that etc. which was nice to hear although brought it all up again. I'm about the 4th to go because of the way it's being run .
Anyway I have 2 interviews lined up so thanks for your support.

Hope you do well in your interviews and land a really good job OP.👍

Good luck with the interviews - sounds as though you’re well out of it!

Good luck with the interviews.

thanks everyone ☺️

Just saw your update re the colleague being appalled at how you were treated (as she should be).

Good luck with the interviews too!