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Original poster

Fired yesterday now tricky boss wants 2 hour meeting!

147 replies

NotMyDust · 01/06/2022 08:44

Very badly managed project, no busonness plan, unclear goals,anager has fallen out with a lot of people. Previous post holder walked out, his targets transferred on to me with no real handover process, losing money fast, so yesterday I was called on to. a meeting with the CEO and my line manager and "let go". I made it easy for them as the writing was in the wall for a while and I've been applying for new jobs right left and cente.

BUT line manager now wants a 2 hour meeting this morning! juat handover stuff officially I guess which part of me cba to do after being treated so badly, but otoh I am a decent human being and like to be professional.

However she has said some pretty horrid/immature stuff to me in the past eg I give her a negative feeling every time she sees me.

Please can i have some tips for how to deal with this, what to say, boundaries etc? ideally I would channel Michelle Obama rather than pissed off teenager (which is secretly how I could be triggered after everything she's put me through) .
thanks

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 01/06/2022 09:24

I would send a handover document and just answer questions around that. Take any emotion out of it and don’t engage with anything not directly related to the handover.
Only respond to questions and not comments and mostly say “that is covered in the document”
Feel happy that you are done with them and focus on the fact that every minute you spend with her is one less minute you have to spend with her

Brefugee · 01/06/2022 09:24

That's rough OP. Sleep on it. Suggest next week anyway.
And then dig out any and everything that you were given - update it in a similar way, and handover that.

Don't get personal, don't get angry, nothing. Just give them the basics they need to pick it up and remain professional.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 01/06/2022 09:25

As others have said, you can decline the meeting. Don't make things easy for them or be nice.

Trust me, these people wouldn't do the same for you.

Bad handover first time round rings alarm bells for me.

DolphinaPD · 01/06/2022 09:26

I wouldn't be going in for that. Even if they paid. Fuck them.

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 01/06/2022 09:26

Brefugee · 01/06/2022 09:24

That's rough OP. Sleep on it. Suggest next week anyway.
And then dig out any and everything that you were given - update it in a similar way, and handover that.

Don't get personal, don't get angry, nothing. Just give them the basics they need to pick it up and remain professional.

This sounds good.

I think it’s fine to say I’ve just been fired. I’m not in the right frame of mind for a meeting. I will write up where everything is up to and after you have read it we can have a meeting next week if you have any remaining questions.

BIWI · 01/06/2022 09:27

I don't know if you can on Teams, as it's a long time since I used it (hooray!), but can you record the meeting? I'd certainly be looking for that option as well as making sure everything is recorded and sent to you in writing afterwards, for your agreement that it is correct and factual.

HalfShrunkMoreToGo · 01/06/2022 09:28

Suggest that the team meeting is recorded so she can refer back to it as handover. That should be enough to keep the content civil or if she reverts to form and becomes unpleasant you'll have a recording of it.

Stick to the tipis, be clear, be specific, do not bring emotion into it or discuss anything subjective.

Portiasparty · 01/06/2022 09:28

Cheesecakeandwineinasuitcase · 01/06/2022 09:21

Exactly. The fact that they haven’t done this is poor planning. I would never invite someone to a 2 hour meeting and not give them an agenda or at least some idea as to what is to be covered.

Show quote history

I also agree with this. It establishes the meeting on a much more businesslike footing and makes sure she can't turn it into a scapegoating exercise. The chances are she's lining you up to blame for the project being a disaster, even after you leave, so don't allow her to have any bullets.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 01/06/2022 09:28

Also OP, re a reference, she may just give you a date worked reference and not a glowing one re your work so I wouldn't worry too much about that.

Fraaahnces · 01/06/2022 09:29

I think you should notify her ahead of the meeting to advise her that you will be recording the meeting. This will hopefully stop her from being accusatory, manipulative or evil and be a useful tool to help you cover your arse if she is evil. It may even make her decide to let you off.

Brefugee · 01/06/2022 09:29

agrh you've agreed?
Use the meeting to get an agenda for a proper handover meeting. You need time to get things together as it's still a mess from the last person (you don't have to say this, but you can imply it)

Then keep today's meeting to only the discussion of the agenda - the things they want to know from you.
Then ask for the next meeting about it to be Friday morning (no point having to stew over the weekend)
And when you have that, make sure you can cover the agenda in an hour - put it all in a PDF document that can't be overwritten. Send it to as many people in one mail as you think need it. But make sure you cc at least one person with the document (pref CEO)

you can do that, right?

GreenClock · 01/06/2022 09:30

I wouldn’t pretend to have IT issues. But the advice re boundaries has been good. If she oversteps, warn her that you will terminate the call if she does it again. Good luck.

Dixiechickonhols · 01/06/2022 09:41

On a positive if you do it then it’s done and not spoiling your weekend. Be professional even if they aren’t. Don’t be tempted to talk to fill gap. Good luck.

senua · 01/06/2022 09:42

You have had a meeting where they sacked you and said that they would pay you one month's gardening leave.
Do you have this promise in writing?
No evidence of notice-pay to be paid, no handover.

Change123today · 01/06/2022 09:42

Agree with what a few people have said - request an agenda before hand. This is so you can be able to provide what she needs as much as possible via email - hopefully the 2 hour meeting can then be a lot shorter!

Stick to the facts and don’t get distracted by personal things. Ask for it to be recorded? I find this always keeps the meeting to what is needed.

EngTech · 01/06/2022 09:42

Say you have started a new job and give them 30 minutes when suitable to you

tootiredtoocare · 01/06/2022 09:44

If you've got 4 weeks notice (i.e., they're paying you for the next month) then I'm pretty sure that in effect you're still employed by them so you're required to fulfil their requests. (Having said that, what can they do, sack you?) I'd just not talk about being let go or the events surrounding that, keep it as professional as you would with a new client. Try to create an agenda yourself and stick to it, keep her on your topic as much as you can. Don't even look her in the eyes if you know she's going to trigger you, look over her head. Have all the info you think they'll need ready, and if you don't know an answer just say so.

Overthewine · 01/06/2022 09:45

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

KettrickenSmiled · 01/06/2022 09:46

Can you manage without the couple of hours pay, & a reference from this specific woman? If so, decline her bloody Teams request - "Sandra, as you have told me I give you a negative feeling every time you see me, I'll spare both of us the ordeal of this meeting."

However she has said some pretty horrid/immature stuff to me in the past eg I give her a negative feeling every time she sees me.

More importantly, best of luck with your other job prospects. Your job sounded like a shitshow, & I'm sorry you got dumped on & blamed.

diddl · 01/06/2022 09:50

Could you use this meeting to find out what they want to know & then email that in at your convenience?

If they don't want you to work notice-can they call on you to do anything?

TigerLilyTail · 01/06/2022 09:52

Personally, I’d take a backseat and let them control the meeting with you just answering their questions. If you need more time you can say something like, I’ll need to check on that and I’ll email you back. Once it hits 2 hours, say you are sorry but you have another appointment so need to go.

if it’s just a handover meeting, it should be strictly about procedure. So, you can say that your predecessor never left information about that.

hopefully, it won’t be as bad as you think. If it is bad, just leave partway.

KettrickenSmiled · 01/06/2022 09:53

senua · 01/06/2022 09:42

You have had a meeting where they sacked you and said that they would pay you one month's gardening leave.
Do you have this promise in writing?
No evidence of notice-pay to be paid, no handover.

Yup - how secure is this agreement OP?

Williamshatnershorses · 01/06/2022 09:56

I agree with a lot of what others have said. If you still have time, get an agenda and ask specifically ask what they expect the scope of your contribution to be i.e, is it just factual or are they looking for your opinion on the project and where it’s failing? (I would not be giving ANY opinion btw)

I’d also probably ask for a third party to attend, “under the circumstances”. I’d not be happy meeting with them one to one

Personally I’d focus on keeping it very factual and very short. If they ask any questions about things they criticised you about or gave as examples of why they fired you, I’d enjoy being very petty and say ‘I don’t know’. You owe them nothing at this point.

But I’d get it done today so that it’s done and I can move on.

DogInATent · 01/06/2022 09:56

Ignore the two hour element of the meeting request. If the LM hasn't set an agenda, you set one. I suggest you restrict it to getting from your LM a list of the handover information they want from you, then you go away and put it together.

It's not reasonable to be fired Tuesday and expected to do the handover Wednesday. Any reasonable company would have left the handover until after the long weekend.

You could still refuse the meeting, stating that you need time to think about the meeting yesterday when they fired you. You're not yet ready to spend time with your LM going over handover details.

Beefcurtains79 · 01/06/2022 09:57

Why would you help them out? I’d be ‘too stressed’ unfortunately, don’t be a mug.