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Original poster

Retrained but shit at my new career.

119 replies

malificent7 · 12/03/2022 07:22

I was managed out of my first job after retraining due to performance issues and quickly got a new job.
I have passed my probation but feel a bit intimidated. My manager says I'm scatty but also said i have improved immensely.Basically I'm scared of her and she makes me anxious so i make more mistakes. Plus i only had 1 day off in 3 weeks which is knackering. I have a performance meeting to address some concerns on Monday. So i am feeling demoralised....i'm shit at my new career right? I annoying as i got a first in training. What next if i get managed out...again?
Im not giving too many details as outing.

OP posts:
LIZS · 12/03/2022 10:53

If criticism is public that is not constructive so worth asking for it to be explained one to one. Are you being set targets for review, these should be SMART(specific, measurable, achieveable, relevant and time bound) and recorded. You want to improve but need more guidance and support on how to do so.

PermanentTemporary · 12/03/2022 10:54

Shit management is pretty common. I would say you are the manager's pet project and they'll get tired of it or go on to something else. People who are learning how to do the job aren't going to be fast or brilliant and they should know that.

What do you think would help? Do you have a plan? Don't be afraid to go in there with your plan written down. Manage your manager - aim to get them to endorse what you want to do and praise anything that they do well (nice atmosphere? Attention to customer service?)

Original poster
malificent7 · 12/03/2022 11:02

I feel like the pet project yes!! Just not a good one!

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Original poster
malificent7 · 12/03/2022 12:20

The no social media contract is that we dont slate the business on sm.

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Xiaoxiong · 12/03/2022 12:29

That doesn't prevent you from telling us your general industry and what your job is, just don't name your employer or slag them off. If people can give you some advice maybe it will help you improve.

I do feel for you, it can be horrible worrying that you're not performing and it can become a vicious circle knocking your confidence. Thanks

EmmaH2022 · 12/03/2022 13:28

@malificent7

I know where i am going wrong. I am trying to improve. I would ask for shadowing but scary boss shadowing me will make me more anxious.
Could you give us an idea of what's going wrong? Maybe we can help.
BeePeeGee · 12/03/2022 13:34

What industry?

Original poster
malificent7 · 12/03/2022 13:35

Health

OP posts:
bluejelly · 12/03/2022 13:42

I think it takes at least 6 weeks to settle into a new role. Don't be so hard on yourself.
Also, join a union!

Original poster
malificent7 · 12/03/2022 14:32

Im 3 months in so i don't have that excuse!

OP posts:
Fangdango · 12/03/2022 14:37

Make sure to join a union.
One thing they can police is whether you're being kept to a higher standard than anyone else.
It's easy to feel you're the problem when sometimes everyone is floundering.
Manager sounds like a mixed curse / blessing - could be invested in your success even if a bit full on?

Quitelikeit · 12/03/2022 14:46

If you state the occupation you really won’t be commuting any sin. You are seeking support - to get proper insight you should offer up more information-

mdh2020 · 12/03/2022 15:05

I think you need to talk to HR not you line manager

Original poster
malificent7 · 12/03/2022 18:04

What should i say to hr?

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canthecardsbewrong2022 · 12/03/2022 18:53

You've passed probation - try and hold that as confidence!

I think I may get a probation extended myself when the time comes next month - and for the first time I would be ok with it. I have a role currently where in the past I've always been able to wow and get by with my telephone manner saving me but now new skills are at play as I don't have a phone-based role anymore.

I oddly worked with a woman in my longest job who acted in kind of the same manner, would call you out on stuff even in front of customers, look through my work when I wasn't in to find any problem going, it was cringeworth at times - I just realised it was them with the problem though regrettably as I've gotten older I've inherited their stress head! Somehow I worked there for 5 years, must have been because I was younger as I wouldn't like to say I'd cope now.

I know when I've struggled with characters in a work place, I found it some comfort to read up how to deal with different personalities.

SilverMakeUpBag · 13/03/2022 07:45

You do sound ground down by the job. Are there colleagues you can speak with, to see how you can best manage the job, the criticism, etc?
Does the Manager always deal with newbies like this?

Krabby · 13/03/2022 07:54

1 day off in 3 weeks is shit and breaches the rest break/ time off requirements of the Working Time Regulations- which you cannot opt opt of (you can only opt out of the 48 hour week bit).

I'd find another job tbh.

Original poster
malificent7 · 13/03/2022 08:34

I probably should. It only worked out like that as i swapped my oncall shift with my manager( she asked me to). Strictly speaking it is one day off in 19 days but on the day off i was on call and wasn't a proper day off. It was only free as they didnt need me to come in but i had to be vigilant.To be fair to her she did say I should tell her if i felt tired but i just soldiered on feeling ok. I think the psychological implications of not having a weekend to look forward to got to me. Now on my 1st weekend off in 3 weeks i am stressed about a Monday meeting and doing my SMART goals.
I have been told off after each of my on call shifts for being in the department for too long( on my own as a newly qualified professional with no support) because we get double time oncall and they didnt want to pay me for too long even though the work i do cannot be rushed...if the patients aren't ready we have to wait.

Before this 1st oncall shift she told me to call her if there were any issues. I texted her with a few admin issues then on Monday she told me i shouldn't have texted her and should have been able to work it out alone.on one hand she will say....ask me any question no matter how stupid, on the other, she will tell me to think outside the box and work it out myself.

Another time she told me to check the rota online so i did..i then came in the wrong time on the Monday and she told me i should have checked the paper diary and that i couldn't possibly have checked the online diary the day before ( i did...she hadnt updated the electronic rota ).

I'm just really down as i finally passed probation and got a much sought after pension.

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Original poster
malificent7 · 13/03/2022 08:44

Also, she said that I am " scatty" which has stuck in her mind as a label which makes me nervous and...more scatty.

OP posts:
DoubleHelix79 · 13/03/2022 09:02

If I was your manager I would advise you to try and identify strategies to help you prevent errors. Checklists for example really help me not forget small details. Simply trying to not be forgetful has never worked for anyone. Shadowing a more experienced colleage can also be really helpful. They often pass on little tricks that make a big difference.

An unrealistic workload also needs addressing - everyone starts making mistakes when there is too little time.

With regards to interacting with your manager: Be open with the fact that you're struggling but try and suggest problem solving strategies rather than expecting her to fix the problem. Also listen to what she suggests and show her that you are taking them on board.

Good luck OP - it'd rare that someone is completely in the wrong job, often they can get up to speed with a bit of extra work.

LIZS · 13/03/2022 09:04

It sounds as of she is setting you up to fail and moving goalposts. Ask for procedures on writing if they are not, ie. which rota is kept up to date, criteria for staying on call overtime, handover of patients where your shift ends. Then when challenged refer back to these. It cannot be right that the rota gives 19 consecutive days then on call.

Lurking9to5 · 13/03/2022 09:06

That's awful. Calling a new person ''scatty'' is ridiculous. Hasn't she heard of onboarding. Haven't HR told her how to support new staff properly.

Lurking9to5 · 13/03/2022 09:15

@malificent7

We did go through a very chaotic period whilst systems changed but we have settled down now. I am being got at for every mistake but no praise for good work....mistakes are normally admin related when i am in a rush. They one one hand tell me to slow down so i don't make mistakes but on the other hand tell me to speed up as there are people waiting I feel like i am being gaslighted. I am oerimenapausal so get brain fog and possibly adhd/ asd but i doubt that will cut the mustard with them . Yesterday my work was criticised in front of the whole office. I don't want to feel like a failure but I do.
Giving everything you do a negative interpretation rather than a positive one happened to me in a job I was in once. Women who'd been there 20 years were not held to as high a bar as I was when I was new. it felt so traumatising at the time. This is a completely traumatising experience.

Don't tell them ''I get brain fog''.

Say that you would perform better if they weren't expecting the worst all the time.

Original poster
malificent7 · 13/03/2022 09:50

What is taking the piss massively is once i didn't know how to use a machine...i called for help...both manager and deputy came to help and they didnt know how to use it either ( qualified at least 20 years between them!) I then got blamed for not knowing how to use it and i shouldn't have asked the top boss ( made him look bad i rekon!)

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Original poster
malificent7 · 13/03/2022 10:23

Also they advertised to job as one wage...then once I'd got thee job I was offered 4,000 below the advertised rate as I'm newly wualified...I've been had havn't i?

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