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Original poster

Anyone work from home whilst caring for a baby?

62 replies

Hugbear · 04/12/2020 16:39

My maternity leave is ending so I'm due to go back to work next month but am dreading it. I can work from home due to covid but I don't want to put my baby in nursery so thinking of keeping her with me at home. Is this even manageable ? My colleague who has 5 young kids works from home without any help. How do you guys manage?

OP posts:
Pantheon · 04/12/2020 16:46

I worked part time /freelance when DD was a baby, from 6 months ish. I worked when she napped and evenings. It's doable if not part time and your baby sleeps OK but I don't think it's possible if you're full time . That's just my opinion though

Pantheon · 04/12/2020 16:47

*doable if you're part time

Feminist10101 · 04/12/2020 16:49

Highly unlikely to be allowed in your company handbook/contract.

Try asking your boss.

ODFODXmas · 04/12/2020 16:49

@Pantheon

I worked part time /freelance when DD was a baby, from 6 months ish. I worked when she napped and evenings. It's doable if not part time and your baby sleeps OK but I don't think it's possible if you're full time . That's just my opinion though
What if you’re a part time receptionist who needs to be available during office hours?
ZadieZadie · 04/12/2020 16:51

I'm just back to work with an 11 month old and your plan sounds nuts. I can't do any work when she's around!

DottyWott · 04/12/2020 16:53

Get a nanny? Even for half days. Sounds very frustrating for you and baby to try and work while caring for them.

Feminist10101 · 04/12/2020 16:53

@Pantheon

*doable if you're part time
Being freelance is a completely different animal.
Ohalrightthen · 04/12/2020 16:54

@ZadieZadie

I'm just back to work with an 11 month old and your plan sounds nuts. I can't do any work when she's around!
Yup!
Twizbe · 04/12/2020 16:56

Check with your work. Most require you to have childcare while working from home.

Earlier this year many families found they had to work with zero childcare. I don't know anyone who enjoyed that situation. Most were having to squeeze work around naps and felt like they were doing every job badly as a result.

Nursery has been great for my two, but there are also nannies and childminders

WishingHopingThinkingPraying · 04/12/2020 16:57

You need to arrange childcare if you can. WFH with kids is only a short term thing in an absolute emergency. You can't do your job properly with a child there. Workplaces tolerate it due to covid necessity but I'm not sure you have an excuse not to use childcare?

Gazelda · 04/12/2020 16:58

I doubt your employer would agree to this. It's probably in your workplace handbook/policies.

Practically speaking, I thin most roles are incompatible with caring for a baby at the same time. How do you handle a meeting/phone call if baby is crying? How do manage nappy changes if your supposed to be logged on and working? How does your baby get enough attention and stimulation while,you are busy working?

Neither work nor baby would be getting your full attention, you will end up riddled with guilt and frazzled.

GirlCalledJames · 04/12/2020 17:00

I had my baby home for a single day today and could only work during his nap. You can’t work well and look after a child properly in most jobs.

RedMarauder · 04/12/2020 17:05

@ZadieZadie

I'm just back to work with an 11 month old and your plan sounds nuts. I can't do any work when she's around!
This.

They are too young to entertain themselves.

Even better from about the age of 1 if I was on a laptop my DD would try and grab it.

Use a childminder or nanny if you are worried about nursery, though you have left it very late to find the former.

BeesAnkles · 04/12/2020 17:07

How old is your baby?

This sounds absolutely nuts, sorry! DH and I both WFH and shared childcare of our 12-month-old for 10 days when nursery was closed. It was horrendously stressful.

At least older children can entertain themselves. Babies/toddlers need constant attention (and I say this as someone whose toddler would be happy to play independently all day! He still gets up to mischief so needs constant supervision.)

It depends what your job is, of course, but if it involves even the slightest bit of concentration and your baby is at crawling/walking stage, you will probably find it highly stressful.

BeesAnkles · 04/12/2020 17:09

Even better from about the age of 1 if I was on a laptop my DD would try and grab it.

YY to that! I worked from the sofa so I could be with my DS but the constant grabbing of my laptop, folders, etc, was a nightmare.

ChanklyBore · 04/12/2020 17:12

I did full time study with a baby and I’ve also done full time self employment with a baby, without using childcare. It’s doable if your hours are flexible, you can take each day as it comes without bothering about strict routines or timings. I’d say I found the full time study harder but that might have been because I was also a single parent at the time, and that I had two children at that time. I was definitely running on empty after a few years of each. I didn’t get much down time, and only a few hours interrupted sleep every night. I had to work very hard to preserve one day off work in each fortnight but didn’t get any holiday or sick time. It was easier with babies 0-2 than it was a bit later say 2-4.

I don’t know if it would be allowed if employed, that’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to be employed. I’d do it again though, no regrets.

Cheesypea · 04/12/2020 17:17

Do you have a partner? Can they work flexibly to provide some care in your office hours. Any support from parents etc?

soughsigh · 04/12/2020 17:24

I tried to WFH during lockdown accompanied by the 18mo. It didn't happen, he can play independently quite well for 20 minutes or so but comes over the second you touch your laptop.

I was looking after him 12 hours a day, then working for 2 hours during his nap and 2 hours after he went to bed. That still only makes half a day of work.

Perhaps the colleague with 4 children just has them entertain/look after each other.

ElectricMistofelees · 04/12/2020 17:26

In theory it may be doable, but as a permanent home worker I’d say that it’s grossly unfair on your team mates. People do try but it’s fairly obvious when it’s going on and the level of distraction/non-availability impacts on everyone’s day.

Brunt0n · 04/12/2020 17:26

No. Not possible unless you’re willing to be a shit employee / shit parent / both

ivfbeenbusy · 04/12/2020 17:27

Personally I think it's unreasonable to expect that of your baby and your employer

Plus most employment contracts state that working from home can't be used in place of childcare

I tried it with an off the record agreement with my boss when DD was 6-9 months for 1 day a week. Once she started rolling and certainly when she started crawling it wasn't safe for her for my attention to be elsewhere

december212 · 04/12/2020 17:28

What are your reasons for not wanting to use nursery?

Working from home with young kids is, in my experience, impossible. Possibly depends on what work you do and how flexible but you can guarantee that the moment you take a work call will be the moment that they absolutely require your attention/snack/pee, etc.

user159 · 04/12/2020 17:36

Depending on what you do but I do think it's a bit much expecting an employer to agree to this. As PP's have said, it's practically impossible to concentrate with a little one in the house!

Iggly · 04/12/2020 17:37

No way. It’s understandable you dont want to leave your baby but at the end of the day you have paid employment and need to respect your employers. That means using proper childcare.

Helloyouthere · 04/12/2020 17:38

I WFH with my children around, mine are 6 and 9 so it isn't too bad and bar holidays or if they have to isolate they are in school for most of my working day.

Most companies are stricter though and wouldn't allow this. Check with your employer.

With such a young one I think your LO would be better off in childcare. During full blown lockdown I felt as if I was neglecting my kids as they were mostly sat in front of the TV whilst I worked. It really isn't the best for your child x