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Original poster

Employer have said I have resigned - I haven't. Urgent help please!

999 replies

Titslikepicassos · 06/11/2020 18:25

I have a loooong thread in AIBU and received excellent support but things have escalated.

Long story short, I went on maternity leave this time last year. I had issues at work throughout my pregnancy, being shouted at and sidelined and told to move locations. Sorted it all out informally.

In March I asked to return to work early from Mat leave due to financial issues caused by lockdown. At this point my boss attempted to move me again, that didn't work and she then went back on the hours she had given me and it messed up my childcare.

I raised a formal grievance and put a flexible working request in at the same time. The company failed to do anything with my request and the grievance process was mismanaged and a data breach occurred in the middle of it, where my grievance letter was upload to a public file and seen by others.

The grievance was upheld in parts but they again tried to move me to a new location which doesnt work due to childcare issues.

I requested mediation with my boss in order to go back to work as I'm still not back 7 months later.

Today the regional director has said that they won't honour mediation and I have now resigned.

My union rep has disappeared and I received this at 16:00 today so couldn't get hold of ACAS.

Any advice would be very welcome!

OP posts:
Margaritatime · 30/03/2021 20:00

That’s good news. Well done for being persistent and patient.

NoGoodPunsLeft · 31/03/2021 06:54

You're doing so well @Titslikepicassos 👊🏼

Pinkappleblossom · 31/03/2021 20:01

Wow good news!

TheQueensCousin · 01/04/2021 15:07

👍🏼❤️💐

SeasonFinale · 03/04/2021 18:58

fingers crossed they won't want it hanging around either and will make a sensible offer.

NoWordForFluffy · 06/04/2021 10:44

@SeasonFinale

fingers crossed they won't want it hanging around either and will make a sensible offer.
Judging them on their past performance, I think this is optimistic!

Part (or all) of the problem could be that their solicitor can't get instructions from them to enable a reasonable offer to be made. Some people don't like the legal advice they're given and dig their heels in (often not looking at the bigger picture re the costs they incur by taking this stance)!

For your sake, Tits, I hope they see sense soon.

LakieLady · 06/04/2021 22:10

I also think that there's an element of the employer hoping that the (ex) employee will get ground down by it all and settle just to bring the whole sorry saga to an end. But we all know that the OP won't do that because she has the might of the MN hive mind behind her!

I am still gobsmacked at the woeful incompetence of the management, HR etc. They really don't seem to know what they are doing, and they don't realise they don't know, either.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 07/04/2021 12:52

I'm fairly certain that my ex employer's are hoping I drop out - not a chance.

I haven't heard a thing since my union rep was supposed to meet with ACAS, shall chase it up.

OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 07/04/2021 13:23

I would chase, yes!

Your ex-employers are bloody idiots. #statesthebleedingobvious

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 08/04/2021 11:56

All chased up.

My rep and ACAS spoke this morning. He's asked for the same figure my solicitor has asked for and stated that we are not open to negotiations. It's slightly more than the figure I gave to ACAS in early conciliation.

I'm expecting them to ignore the offer or counter with another low figure.

The tribunal have asked whether I want judicial mediation - which I've agreed to, to show willingness to wrap this up. I have a feeling we'll be in a cycle of failed conciliation and mediation until the end of time much closer to the hearing date.

OP posts:
20newnames · 08/04/2021 20:27

At least something is happening, and agreeing to judicial mediation is probably going to stop it dragging so long. Keep going, you’re doing great!

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 09/04/2021 14:13

Thanks all.

Heard back from ACAS. The company have turned down my offer but said they are willing to discuss settlement but not at the figures we are asking. It's been left at the moment to get advise from my solicitor and my rep has gone on annual leave.

I don't think there is much point entering into further negotiations at this stage. The company haven't countered, the pressure will increase when it's time to prepare witness statements and the bundle of documents.

OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 09/04/2021 14:28

It's up to them to counter in that case. You aren't going to bid against yourself! They can counter with their reasoning as to why they think you've offered too much.

Maybe it will take something more concrete happening, as you say, to sharpen their minds.

KatyaZamolodchikova · 09/04/2021 22:00

Agreed it’s for them to counter at whatever they are willing to pay. For example, I once had a claim for £30,000. We were confident we could defend it but for what it would cost us in time/resource/legal fees we counter offered £3,000. It was a world away from what was being asked but it’s what we thought was a sensible offer to make our lives easier. (As it happened, they declined, it went to tribunal and we won) but the point is, I would expect them to counter offer with at least an idea of what they’d be willing to consider.

Equally I has someone pitch at £750,000 which I did not counter offer, but did tell ACAS I’d be willing to discuss further if they come back with a sensible figure. They didn’t. We also won that tribunal.

OP, you sound very sensible and like you have some solid advice. Hang in there and keep your nerve. It sounds like you’ve got this.

SeasonFinale · 12/04/2021 20:09

The good thing is every time something is suggested with a view to resolution you are showing willing which will stand you in good stead.

The daft thing is it is left for you to get advice from your solicitor! That should be the other way round - they should be getting advice as to what level of counter offer they are willing to make. I would ask your solicitor to just write to them and say we are looking forward to receiving your counter offer.

stevalnamechanger · 12/04/2021 20:16

GET A LAWYER ! ASAP

Haffdonga · 12/04/2021 20:23

@stevalnamechanger

GET A LAWYER ! ASAP
READ THE THREAD!
NoWordForFluffy · 12/04/2021 21:34

@SeasonFinale

The good thing is every time something is suggested with a view to resolution you are showing willing which will stand you in good stead.

The daft thing is it is left for you to get advice from your solicitor! That should be the other way round - they should be getting advice as to what level of counter offer they are willing to make. I would ask your solicitor to just write to them and say we are looking forward to receiving your counter offer.

I still think this is about instructions, or lack thereof. They've instructed their solicitor to reject the offer, but won't follow advice on making a counter (because they don't / won't accept the advice as they think it's too high).

You're therefore left to bid against yourself (as if) in the hope that they see sense.

However, you can't just say you're willing to negotiate, without actually engaging in discussions.

If I was your solicitor, I'd be having a Without Prejudice chat with the other side to ask what on Earth they're playing at. At least then there will be an idea about what they think it's worth.

Alternista · 12/04/2021 21:36

Every time I see this thread pop up I think “oh god, please let this be sorted now for that poor woman” and it never is.

I hope you wipe the absolute fucking FLOOR with them.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 12/04/2021 22:10

I'm hoping my solicitor will get on to the other side tomorrow and find out what they want.

The original figure they offered me was a low five figures and I've been told this means they're fairly serious about settling. However, this was offered prior to their solicitor getting involved.

I'm resigned to this being drawn out but it is rather infuriating!

OP posts:
CrikeyPeg · 13/04/2021 05:59

@Alternista

Every time I see this thread pop up I think “oh god, please let this be sorted now for that poor woman” and it never is.

I hope you wipe the absolute fucking FLOOR with them.

Same! I can't believe it's still going on.

I had a legal thing drag on for two weeks (haha, that's like a blink compared to this saga) - drove me nuts (and to drink!).

I'm impressed with your tenacity Tits - they really don't know who they're pickin.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 23/04/2021 17:07

Still ongoing...

However, I've just received an email from HR telling me that it's just come to their attention (what a joke) that they didn't pay me my correct notice period. My missing 4 weeks wages will be paid by the end of the month.

Looks like some damage control is being done before they submit their ET3.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 23/04/2021 17:08

So they reckon you never told them???

AngryAngryAngryAngry

🤦🏼‍♀️

NoWordForFluffy · 23/04/2021 18:09

'Come to their attention' = read the ET1 and shat themselves as they realised they'd fucked up (after their solicitor asked them WTF they didn't pay you).

notapizzaeater · 23/04/2021 21:28

Ha ! Covering backs and ticking boxes ....