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Working when you've got a child
22

limmyfan99 · 21/01/2020 15:59

The background is my girlfriend and I are planning to have a child in a few years and we're trying to lay the groundwork now. I do a 9-5 office job and she is a nanny doing long hours. Once we have a child she won't be able to work as a nanny due to the hours, what kind of work do people do when they need to either look after a child in the day or pick them up from daycare in the afternoon?
How do people deal with having a newborn, then a toddler and make it work around their jobs? We earn alright when put together but relying on a single salary would hurt.

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rosydreams · 22/01/2020 07:56

my other half works days and i work a few evenings a week therefore no need for childcare

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ememem84 · 22/01/2020 07:58

Dh and I both work 9-5 full time. I’m back at work next week after mat leave. Either or both of us does nursery pick ups and drop offs.

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puguin86 · 22/01/2020 08:00

Office jobs 9-5 and found a nursery open 8-6

I have now negotiated working from home once a week and DH works from home a lot now

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Dozer · 22/01/2020 08:01

Key thing is to both earn enough to cover childcare costs on top of your other costs. Childcare jobs aren’t ideal due to the long hours.

If one of you would go part time or stay at home for a while it’d make sense to get married, to protect that person financially in the event of breaking up and other circumstances.

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Dozer · 22/01/2020 08:01

Childminders and nurseries are usually 8-6

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scrambledeggs01 · 22/01/2020 08:02

When we had little children my husband worked full time but did all the nursery drop offs so I could go into work early and do pick ups. We also used to take alternate days off when the children were ill.

Honestly it was really hard juggling work and children and paying a lot of money for childcare but it's worth it in the long run as we both have good jobs and managed to progress whilst childcare costs have now almost disappeared

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RicStar · 22/01/2020 08:07

Working in childcare I would think your partner would have ideas she could nanny with own child / childmind / work in a nursery that gives discounts for employee children / TA or learning support roles. It is good to consider these things but as long as you are broadly financially sound I would think you will come up with an appropriate plan at the time.

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coffeeforone · 22/01/2020 08:42

You could find a nursery near your work? They are usually 8-6.

Our DC both go to nursery 8-6 and have done from a young age, my office hours can be quite long and I have a long commute, so DH does most of the drop offs and pick ups. But I do have a bit of flexibility to do the odd drop off if needed.

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coffeeforone · 22/01/2020 08:47

Also, your partner is in a perfect position to slightly change her role but still work in childcare. She could offer part time nannying or childminding (with her own child in tow), or work at a nursery if they offer discounts to staff? There are a few staff at DS's nursery who have their children there (they just work in a different room to their own child), so I assume it must be financially worthwhile for them to do that.

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PinkDaffodil2 · 22/01/2020 08:48

Could she look at nanny / daycare jobs where she can look after her own child too? Otherwise you seem to be in a good position for childcare as your hours are regular and not long so you’re available to do nursery drop offs and pick ups if needed - she could for example work 3 longer days a week and have 2 days with DC.
Most women I know are takin my 9-12 months off work which is how you manage it with a newborn!

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Saladd0dger · 22/01/2020 08:49

My husband does the days and I work a couple evenings a week picking up overtime when I want. Now the youngest is in nursery I’m able to get a few odd day shifts.

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 22/01/2020 08:52

Expensive childcare, flexible working from home, a self employed husband and some family back up! It’s crap, difficult and expensive.

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mdh2020 · 22/01/2020 08:55

If you look at Gransnet you will see that a lot of grandparents are involved in childcare. Do you have family near you? Well done for thinking about this issue before your partner is pregnant. Unfortunately there is no simple answer and no ‘one size fits all’. The bottom line, as has already been stated, is that you have to earn enough to cover the childcare and you have to be able to work out a rota between you for dropping off and picking up the baby from nursery.

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Showmeyourhero · 22/01/2020 09:01

My DH worked during the day and I worked nights, it was the only way for us to not have to pay childcare whilst both still having careers and bringing in salaries. It was hard though as we passed like ships in the night, we worked like that for 2 Years until DC became entitled to childcare funding.

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FrangipaniBlue · 22/01/2020 09:04

Flexible working agreed with my employer at the time so that I started at 7.30 but finished at 3/3.30

DH self employed so he did nursery (and then school) drop offs and started work at 9 and I did the pickups when I finished (and DH worked later).

Lots of use of before and after school clubs, and my DS was a toddler in the days when you only got 15hrs free not 30hrs like you can get now, when I think about it we spent a small fortune on childcare.

Grandparents on hand for odd days when either I had to work extra/late/be away overnight to do after school care until DH got home.

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changedmyname2019 · 22/01/2020 09:06

My husband works Monday-Friday and I work Saturday and Sunday.

It isn't great however it has saved us in childcare costs.

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weebarra · 22/01/2020 09:08

I have three DCs who are now all at school. I work part time, DH works full time. They do breakfast club and after school club 3 days a week. Previously they were in nursery for that time.

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corduroyal · 22/01/2020 09:15

She should become a childminder and look after your child plus someone else's. We've had two childminders, both with dds the same age as ours.

It worked well, you'd probably not want to do it before 6 mo tho and I imagine income would be less than as a nanny with long hours.

Childcare is expensive but you barely spend on entertainment/nice things at all, esp if you get baby gear secondhand, so you can live on less than you think.

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Lobsterquadrille2 · 22/01/2020 09:26

I was a single parent overseas and childcare ran from 8am to 6pm, every week of the year. I went back to work when DD was two months old and was extremely lucky that she was never ill as I had no back up! There isn't any one solution - you decide what you can manage and work around it.

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limmyfan99 · 22/01/2020 09:32

Thanks all, definitely food for thought. We've just got to decide which direction is right to go in.

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Bibidy · 22/01/2020 09:33

Yep, explore flexible working and accept that you'll probably need to use a nursery.

Agree with others that if your GF is a childcare professional, she may be able to get a role where she can have your baby with her, eg in a nursery.

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PlugUgly1980 · 22/01/2020 10:41

Use a nursery which is open from 7:30am to 18:00! Share drop offs and pick ups with partner. We both work full time office jobs, but take it in turns to do a mix of early starts and late finishes.

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