I've recently returned to work following my youngest's birth. I wasnt keen, I love being at home. Following the birth of my eldest I'd helped my dh in his business but in reality that wasnt bringing in much money so now I'm working two days per week. Its admin/reception work but quite specialised.
Its maybe not relevant but the pay is poor, I've worked in much easier roles for more money.
It's a very clique place. Theres a group of women and honestly some of them are awful. Theres no attempt to get to know me and they speak terribly about other people clients and staff. I feel very left out but at the same time I do not want to sit a bitch about others. And I'd be very surprised if they didn't speak about me behind my back.
The work is quite boring because it's a quiet period atm
I then wonder if it's me, because I'd rather be at home with my kids but then I think if the job was better I'd want to be there. Does that make sense? I've always enjoyed working previously and never hated a job but can't decide if I'm miserable because of the job or because my hearts not in it? I'm only on a temporary contract until next April so I'm trying to tell myself to stick it out. If I found something else I'd love to leave but it would also be awkward as I'd still be a client (my husband business have connections to them).
I just know I barely sleep on a Monday night with anxiety. I go in bright and breezy on a Tuesday morning but very quickly everyone elses grumpiness makes me feel rubbish. I barely sleep Tuesday or Wednesday and by wednesday lunchtime I'm desperate to finish and get home.
Any advice?