Managers out there? Maternity question

[ZebraCrossing007]

I work in the City (London) in finance. I have a nearly two year old. I went back to work when my dd was 6 months, and back in July I changed jobs to work for another company. My new manager is a manager from a previous job and I would class her as a friend as well as a manager.
I have a reasonably senior role in the company - probably what you'd class as mid-senior management level.

So the question is I want to have another baby before there is too much of an age gap. What would you say is an acceptable amount of time before we ttc? Do you think if I was there a year and then got pregnant it would be enough time? I don't want to damage my career there and also don't want to disappoint my manager who hired me in as a friend (also obviously the right experience for the job too!).

There is no correct answer to this - you do what is best for you. You don't know how long it will take once you start TTC, and you are already employed so even if you conceived straight away, you would qualify for SMP from that perspective.

Are there any other women in your new company who have go on ML after a similar time period or what's the culture like?
I work in financial services, and took a contract role while pregnant (after a redundancy) and was then offered a perm role. Obviously I disclosed my pregnancy before accepting the job, but in the culture of the place they were happy with this, my manager's opinion was your life isn't work, pregnancies are to be expected and a sizeable company should be able to manage etc. Similar companies I worked for in the last would have had issues with it.
You may not get all the discretionary benefits, as I know in my company they are dependent on length of service. If you are performing well in the role, you are no longer on probation and you are clear from the outset that you won't be checking out mentally before you even go on ML, I think that goes a long way.

I personally would wait at a least a year. Would your friend have hired you if they knew you were going to try for another baby ?
Although you may have the right experience for the job trying and falling so soon for a baby will provide your new employer with a gap that will need filing when you go on ML. Without knowing the circumstances of exactly how high up the chain your friend sits within management she / he may have spoken on your behalf to her/his manager when giving you the job which may not look good in their eyes.

You may not get pregnant for a while. Why wait? There is no law that says you have to wait 2 years.

I used to work in the City. It matters not how long you wait. If you are going to get unfairly treated because of pregnancy you will - whatever you do. Don't live your life round your employer.

So you just have one child? Personally I would assume that someone with just one young child would be more likely than not to want another one fairly soon. (I know not everyone does or can but I'm just saying it's fairly likely!) Do you really think your friend would be surprised?

There was a thread recently where the poster had waited 6 years between pregnancies her employers' sake (her own decision, they didn't know) and was about to announce her pg, when a much newer, younger and less senior member of her team announced hers. The poster was massively p'ed off. I think that the moral of that story was that you need to do what suits you as s family; the law is there to protect you at work.

Your friend knew your skills, and must have known you were the right person for the job. You add value to the company and need to have more confidence in your value.

A short break for maternity leave will not be too detrimental to the value you give. TTC now, and you've still got minimum 9 months work before you take another 6 months leave.

I say go for it now.

You should never take the considerations of your manager into this big decision. As a manager in Financial services its something at the back of my mind that I do think about sometimes with my female team members but in reality its just another part of day to day work that has to be dealt with, not positive nor negative.

Don't over think it as far as work is concerned, they wont. If they do, they are bad managers and its not the maternity thats a problem but them.

Let me put it to you like this: if you were a father, would this be an issue?

Oh blimey if you want to ttc now, do it!

They will be expecting it, probably. Also it might take you longer this time to conceive (it did for me).

I went back in March this year and announced my pregnancy in December, so it will be over a year when I leave for second mat leave in May.
I honestly don't think you should consider your employer in such a big life decision.