Vote: Would you prefer your child to be able to say "my mum was always there" or "my mum trained people across the world"?

[fisil]

I gave up work to be with my boys more, and to make ends meet by doing 1 day a week consultancy/training. Today I was offered potential work in Dubai. Whenever I went it would only be one day (i.e. 2 nights away from home). It sounds REALLY exciting, especially in the world of education when usually a field trip to the Peak District is the best you get, but then I did want to be with my boys more ....

So please vote - which would you prefer your kids to be able to say?

"My mum was happy and I felt loved"

I don't base my childhood on when my mum worked and when she was at home - just that I was happy and loved.

You're not a spoiled bitch, just another mum falling into the guilt trap

Actually, there was a great blog post I read recently (not about going away, but about how when we're stay at home mums we feel guilty if we're not giving full on "proper" attention all the time, because that was the point) ... I'll find it...

here: benign neglect

I honestly and truthfully would prefer my kids to say 'my mum was happy and had a rich and satisfying part time career that allowed her to stretch herself and see the world'

If you feel guilty, buy them exotic gifts from the airport. They'll love them and look forward to you going away

I's prefer to say the first BUT in your position i'd definately do it. They won't remember and if you told them you'd passed it up (when they're older) i'm sure they'd think you were mad!
Mine are 5 and 1 and i'm a SAHM but DP works away every week and they are totally used to it.

Go!

They will STILL be able to say both

Ooo yes, bring them home exciting pressies

I remember torturing my parents once when they went away by insisting they bring me home a monopoly set in the language of the country they were visiting.

They ended up spending best part of a whole day searching every toy store for a Greek Monopoly board ... I was evil...

Go

I gave up work in October to see DS through reception. (cracked and went back 12 hours in April)

Anyway, I digress.........they have a great after school club.........and I used it once or twice, the next day, DS kicks up merry hell at being picked up and at not being allowed to go to CASA.

So I calmly explain that the after school club is for the children whose parents have to work, or for Mummies who have children with afterschool activities and don't want to take the younger ones all over town, so they use the club.

Cue long silence all the way down the bypass.......................................................................................Mummy... when did you say you were going back to work ???

LOL Sherlock - bet you felt loved

I would want my dd to say
"My Mum loved being my Mum"

if going to Dubai would make ma a happier mum - and I have a feeling it would - I would go.

Yes and valued..................

FISIL you go or I will hunt you down and whup your ass.

SherlockLGJ

My dd asked last year why she culd not go to nursery every day. I said because she is very lucky and has a mummy that stops at home with her. Dd replied "Can you get a job please"

I got a job and now she keeps asking me to give it up - you can't win so do what makes you happy. Happy Mum = Happy children

Blimey if it's only two trips you have it both ways- you get to go and do the exciting job and your children get to say "my mum was always there for me". They're hardly going to notice a couple of trips over a lifetime, are they? Go and enjoy it

Mumsnet is like one great big huge guilt sponge!

I'm off to crack open a bottle of fizzy booze then!

YAY!

Congratulations, btw Can you squeeze me into your suitcase?!

Good for you, I honestly can't see a downside!

And, not only but also, it will look great on your CV.

GOGOGO you crazy woman

(how was your night out?)

You are so lucky - well done, IMO you've made the right choice. go, go, go.

gooooooooo

no brainer

you must

enjoy the champers

GO! I have just posted telling Enid not to go on her trip, mind you. But I think 4.5 mo breastfed baby for 3 nights is hugely different to 3 and 1 yos for 2 nights.

And lgj and twinset along the same lines. I work 3 days and DS goes to CM after school. My friend is a SAHM also with a DS in reception. Apparently her DS said to her "I want to be adopted like X (my DS) and go to a big house after school".

GO, go!

You surely wouldn't NOT go on a girly weekend once every few years so why not for work?

Sherlock, my ds brought home a flyer for a new afterschool/holiday club. He too wants me to go back to work so he can go!

Also remember dd and her friend discussing what they wanted to be when they grew up - her friend said, "I'm definitely not going to just stay at home all day with a toddler and just go to toddler group now and again"! Her mother threatened to go back to work full time and leave them with a childminder after school and in holidays to see how she liked it!

well based on the fact that a 1 year old and 3 year old will never remember .. do it

coming on to this late but want to add my bit...

My ds's will say "my mum was always there"

But

I'd love it if they could say "my mum trained people across the world"

I'd love that....I love being a SAHM but I'd love it that could say that about me.

go go go

Was going to say i'd rather they said i was always there but then read it is only 1 or 2 days and thought, oh god no you must go.