I really regret giving up my job - help

[jinglejungle]

I gave up my job 5 years ago and we moved out of London.

My job was very London-centric and impossible to do outside of London.

It was a joint decision but DH has not had a pay rise in that time, and took a pay cut to move to his current job. We are struggling for money, he doesn't want to risk his stable job by getting a riskier well-paid one (which I understand).

I'm stuck. I have enjoyed the time with DD but am now staring at the next 35 years working life ahead of me and I've voluntarily kissed goodbye to a 10 year successful and enjoyable career.

I am an idiot. I don't know what to do.

Someone help me get this into perspective.

What is stopping you from getting a local job? Do you have transferable skills if you cannot get a job in your previous field? Can you retrain in another field which interests you? Do consulting/start your own business?Or can you still commute into London from where you live now? Assuming your daughter is now at school you have more possibilities. It's not the end of the world!

I am in kind of this boat. Not impossible to do outside London, but not the type of my work that I enjoy if that makes sense. Were you finance in some form if it impossible outside London?

I am trying to think about about the areas of my previous job I enjoyed and the skills I have. Those can be transferable.

There must have been reasons you left? Did you honestly love your job and do it for the family, or were you fed up and stressed? I was fed up and stressed with some aspects of my old job, but it is hard not to look back with rose tinted specs.

Have you thought about some time with a career counsellor? I am thinking about that. Worth the investment in the future.

I loved my job. I didn't want her to grow up in London & our house was too small, no garden etc.

Wanted good schools etc.

All of those things we now have & am very happy with that aspect ..... It's just me that feels like i have sacrificed my aspirations & ambitions.

That makes me sad.

You are right, I could retrain in something, just need to decide what.

How do you find career counsellors?

We sold at the worst time so did very badly financially out of it. House prices where we were have rocketed back up but house prices here have hardly budged. Irrelevant I know but making me feel even more stupid.

I think you need to look at it from a different perspective.

Leaving London and giving up work was the right decision for you THEN. Things have moved on and being a SAHM is no longer working for you. Brainstorm all the things you could do where you are with your DH in his stable job. You might be surprised what a bit of thinking throws up.

Never regret your decisions. Be thankful that you had time with your daughter. Some people never get that luxury.

Thank you.

I do think I need to look at it from a different angle.

I am jealous of my friends with great jobs, good incomes etc but need to remind myself that they chose different sacrifices to me.

I'm going to sit down & have a think.

What did you do in London?

Can you say the job, people might have done the same move and found something similar outside London.