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Original poster

partner lost his job! :/

32 replies

mummykayxx · 24/08/2013 12:08

my partner was forced to resign from his job when he was called into a meeting and was told he wasn't getting on there so they were going to pretty much sack him. he has only been there a few months, but he wasn't happy there, they didn't train him very well but I know he tried his best. now we have a 2 year old to support, a flat to run and rent, a mortgage deposit that is going to have to be spent on general living and a car to run (we're young so insurance is about 250 a month on its own). feeling so rubbish that we've spent about a year saving for our deposit and its going to have to be spent on normal everyday things. absolutely gutted. he has worked everyday since 16 and really doesn't want to claim job seekers but until he finds a new job, looks like we're going to have to. sucks :/

OP posts:
Bowlersarm · 24/08/2013 12:10

Could you look for a job?

Original poster
mummykayxx · 24/08/2013 12:24

ive been looking part time for months (so bubba doesn't have to go to nursery) and rejection every time. he wants to be the one to go to work (man thing I guess) plus he's got more experience than me

OP posts:
GetStuffezd · 24/08/2013 12:27

For the time being could one of you stop paying car insurance? It would be a bugger for that person to have to be ferried round by the other but it might save a bit of money. Also if he resigned will he even be able to claim JSA?

GetStuffezd · 24/08/2013 12:27

he wants to be the one to go to work (man thing I guess)
Sorry, in the real world that doesn't cut the mustard and he might have to re-think that attitude in the near future.

Bowlersarm · 24/08/2013 12:28

Fair enough. I would keep looking if I were you though just in case it takes your partner longer than he expects to find a job. It could be a life saver if you're able to find employment and he isn't.

Make sure you get everything you're entitled to in the meantime.

Original poster
mummykayxx · 24/08/2013 12:30

I don't drive so its only his insurance. he is able to claim but is so insistent that hes only going to be unemployed for a few weeks (and jobs are hard to get these days but I don't want to burst his bubble) he says he doesn't need to claim but we will have nothing if it takes him a while to get another job

OP posts:
Original poster
mummykayxx · 24/08/2013 12:31

also hes not his child so think it would be unfair for me to go to work full time and force him to look after my son..

OP posts:
GetStuffezd · 24/08/2013 12:34

250/month on JUST his insurance? Bloody hell I had no idea it was so high for younger people. Are you in an area with decent public transport? Could you perhaps SORN the car for a while?

Original poster
mummykayxx · 24/08/2013 12:39

just his insurance. no public transport atall, we live a half an hour drive from all family too which is a problem :/

OP posts:
dashoflime · 24/08/2013 12:47

Uhh! Horrible situation! The job sounds rubbish though- perhaps one day he will look back and see this as a lucky escape.

YY to JSA- and as soon as possible too (you get paid from the date you claimed, not the date you lost the job)

Also- if your getting Tax Credits- make sure they know about the change of circumstances. If your not getting Tax Credits- then claim. And don't forget about Housing Benefit and Council Tax Benefit.

I disagree that it would be unfair for him to care for your 2 yr old btw- when he got together with you- he took you both on!

CommanderShepard · 24/08/2013 19:10

I agree with the other posters - you and your child come as a package. If he's not working he needs to help out with childcare so you can be the one to work. Seeing it as a man's thing to provide is - sorry - a bit pathetic.

I know JSA isn't what most people want to claim but he needs to start claiming it so that any gap in your finances is mitigated. Forget pride - hard as it is - this is about the welfare of your family. As for your car insurance being ~£3000 per year, can you change cars to something a bit less insurance heavy? Or are you paying fully comp on an old banger that isn't worth it? (We had an ancient first car that was only worth covering for third party fire & theft).

I do feel for you, and maybe I'm misinterpreting but does he have his head in the sand a bit? Is there more to him being asked to resign than just not getting on with them?

CommanderShepard · 24/08/2013 19:12

I'm on my phone so can't link easily but google entitledto.co.uk - if you're entitled to any tax credits or other help then you need to make sure you're claiming them.

HappyMummyOfOne · 24/08/2013 19:45

Take the car off road as its too much of an expense, there must be some public transport as even rural routes here have buses.

Having the "man" work is daft, you need to shelter, feed and clothe a child. If that means you working and him doing the childcare then so be it. If you let him earn to keep you then surely you let him share the childcare, either you are a family or not.

EBearhug · 24/08/2013 21:32

there must be some public transport as even rural routes here have buses.<

My sister lives in the country, and her car was off the road for a bit. If she had had to rely on the bus, she would have been able to get into town where she works twice a week, and not at a time which would have been suitable for work. She just had to take a couple of weeks off till her car was sorted. Rural public transport, where it exists, is often totally unsuitable for holding down a job.

hermioneweasley · 24/08/2013 21:36

I am sorry, that really sucks.

Bluebell99 · 24/08/2013 22:13

but if he resigned, can he even vlaim jsa?

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme · 24/08/2013 22:25

£250 a month? Jesus. Confused that was the cost of mine for a year. You must be able to do something about that surely? I know you get locked into contracts but how long till you're due for renewal? Can you cancel it without penalty?

You might be able to claim for income support etc too. Child tax credit? Council tax help? You really need him to get to the Jobcentre ASAP, they'll help with all that.

dashoflime · 25/08/2013 09:02

He cam claim JSA because he didn't leave without good cause. In this situation I would use the words "contract ended" when asked and only elaborate if asked for more information. (long time welfare rights officer here)

WorrySighWorrySigh · 25/08/2013 19:24

Regarding the car, what is he driving? Having just gone through choosing a car with DD I can say that there are huge differences between car insurance costs.

There is no shame in claiming JSA. Get him to a Job Centre and start claiming. This is what he has paid his NI for all those years.

Right now he needs to keep his chin up. Work with the job centre, they really can help him.

missmapp · 25/08/2013 19:27

The thing about claiming JSA is you get transport paid to go to interviews. DH was made redundant last year and hated signing on, but the paid to go to interviews thing meant he could go to all interviews without having to weigh up if it was worth paying the train fare or whatever.

I went from pt to ft when he lost his job, wouldn't have made that choice otherwise, but needs must.

Good Luck

dashoflime · 26/08/2013 07:26

Very good point about the transport costs missmapp

janey68 · 26/08/2013 10:08

Surely the car I insurance costs can be cut?
And agree with happymummyofone- it's illogical for you to be happy with him supporting you and another mans child, yet when he's no longer working, you pull the 'its not fair to expect him to look after someone else's child ' card.
You need to keep looking for work too.

InTheRedCorner · 27/08/2013 13:30

It's a tough situation. I would look online into changing the insurance, what car do you have?

I have pm'd you a link to a vacancy website incase there is anything there for either of you.

You should both be looking for work now and who ever gets one first needs to work until something more permenent comes along,sign up with agencies for clerical work if you can.

I agree with looking into what you can claim whilst you look as well.

Good luck.

CaptainSweatPants · 27/08/2013 13:33

You should both look for work
Nursery is great for 2 year olds - he'll have a ball !

LIZS · 27/08/2013 13:35

If he resigned he may not be able to claim JSA. Presumably he was on probation and just told it didn't work out . Does he really need the car it sounds like a commitment too far atm . I'm sorry but just cos ds isn't his child if he is at home unemployed he should look after him as your partner if it enables you to work.