How easy was it for you to get your career back after being a long term SAHM?

[Isitrightorwrong]

I am due to either return to work or give notice after my second maternity leave. I have two children under two.

We don't need my earnings to survive.

I enjoy the kids alot and get out to keep myself from going insane.

I worry that if I don't at least work part time that I won't easily get my career back. I have a professional qualification with years and years of senior experience.

So, my question is this: If you have already been here and come out the other side after being a long term SAHM - what was the journey like back into the work force?

I'm also watching with interest. I am currently looking for work, also previously in a senior role with lots of experience. After ds1(3) I went back 4 days a week but took redundancy during maternity leave with DS2 and have also moved abroad, allegedly to a country with a more family friendly working culture.

I'm getting interviews ( although early days with all my applications), however it has been made fairly clear that if I had been out of work for much longer I would not be considered. DS2 is only 15mo, so I was pretty shocked as career breaks are not uncommon in my line of work. Assume the current economic climate is making employers more picky ( although again, the recession hasn't hit as badly where I now live). I'm also likely to have to go back full time, fortunately DP can work PT and I might be able to negotiate reduced hours once (if!) I get my feet under the table.

On the plus side, I'll get 10 hours of my life back a week to spend with children even if I do go back FT as won't be doing hideous London commute. I would love to spend a bit longer at home, but have loved my job also for the last 20 odd years and would be gutted if I couldn't go back.

Assume the current economic climate is making employers more picky

I think that's definitely true. I think employers have always preferred candidates who are in work, but the environment means that they now don't have to look outside that pool.

I left Uni in 1996, which was the first year that the "milk rounds" were back in full swing after the last recession, so basically, for my whole career I've been in a seller's market. Times have definitely changed.

So true reallife. I left uni in 93 and was very very lucky during that recession to get an accountancy training contract. By the time I qualified in 96 there was a huge shortage of staff at the same level, and I was fighting off the job offers.

I've worked for the same company since then, so it has been an interesting few weeks understanding how the recruitment market works these days from the candidates perspective. Thank goodness I've made internal job moves and recruited people myself, because the whole selection process is totally different, even given the fact that I've been promoted and am in a different field. Gone are the days of a quick chat followed by a job offer ( although am possibly seeing things through slightly rose tinted specs - it was a vv long time ago......)

I have three dcs: 13, 9 and one only 11 mths. I've done ft, pt and SAHM and contracting! By far the best solution has been contracting and interim - I'm in digital comms so also fortunate I can do a fair bit from home. Contracting is my recommendation too.

Watching this with interest - I've had a massive time spent at home for unavoidable reasons really, but am really struggling now. I was made redundant when my DS was 5 (id just gone back full time) I then fell on with my DD so didn't look for anything else then. My mum fell ill when DD was 8mth and I cared for her (which was a full time job) until she died recently. So all in all i've been "out of work" or SAHM for 7 year. I am now desperate to get back into it but with such a gap in my CV am really struggling also ive lost so much of my confidence I find even applying for jobs really intimidating. I am lucky that I don't need to work to survive my DH has an ok salary and if were careful we will be okay, I have just applied to do some volunteering so I can at least have something on my CV. Its really not a nice situation to be in though.

Interesting thread. A pal and I were discussing this the other day. Both in professional posts (NHS), so mat leave is fine, but going back after more than a couple of years would probably involve retraining - maybe even a top-up year of a degree - and would put you down a notch or two on salary. She and I both have DHs with project-dependant jobs, so if the project gets cancelled, they're facing redundancy.

The best way we thought would be to reduce our hours rather than quit, keep a foot in the door. Even if DH has a steady income, you just don't know what is around the corner, and if you suddenly find yourself as breadwinner, you might regret chucking a career.

Having said all that, I would quit tomorrow if I dared.

I've never been a SAHM, and I do know one or two women who've gone back into good, full-time well-paid work after years out of the job market, but I think it's a better move to keep your hand in, in some way. Gives you a lot more leeway and options.

This might be going off at a tangent, but I would urge anyone (but particularly women) not just to think about how you can 'survive' at present...but longer term, you need to think about retirement. Contracting may make you feel as if you can work fewer hours because you can charge a higher daily rate, but if you consider that your employer will spend approx 30% on top of your basic salary on pension/benefits/insurances etc, you really need to factor this in to your thinking.

It is not enough to simply think that all will be OK because your DH earns enough. Sorry if this is too pessimistic an outlook - but how do you know that your DH's pension provisions also include you?!
And this is not about what would happen if you split up - most people do not have a good idea of how much they need to save to afford the retirement they would like. How will one person make enough savings for two of you?

I admit to not being a long term SAHM (2 x mat leave of 10 mths each)...but this is partly why: I don't want to risk stalling my career, nor having a big financial deficit (over the course of a working life time)

I am planning to become a SAHM (DD2 is 3 months). My employer allows careers breaks of upto 6 years post baby, you return to a post a the same level you were at when you left (although it may not be in the same department). I am an accountant so in theory this could see me returning to work in a customer-facing role at the equivalent level but hopefully not.

I am mindful that I will need to keep reading & occassional networking to stay in touch with whats going on.

I suppose it's a risk but I have 30 more years of work and I just think I worked my way up once, I can do it again if I need to.

I've never been a SAHM but what I would say as an employer is that the standard of CVs I'm being sent on spec at the moment is really high - it's a tough old world so think carefully before jumping ship, especially if the next generation will be able to step into your shoes with ease.

Also, think about your long term finances - how many years NI contributions have you got and what about employee / private pensions - will your partner pay to keep your contributions up while you are out of the workforce?

HomeEco - it's a very good point. I've made very certain that my contracting day rate factors in all of that and would urge everyone to do so if they are looking at contracting. I took my salary and then added in my bonus, share things, car, hols, health and pension contribs etc. to get to my actual income. Worked out what that was on a per day basis and then pretty much doubled it to get to my starting day rate as a contractor. And will be paying a big chunk of the money I earn on this and other projects into a pension. Plus I do think it is important to future proof your family against the unexpected as much as possible - keeping my CV ticking over so that I can enable a return full time should I really need to (illness, death, divorce can happen to anyone) or want to is at least as important a motivation as wanting to earn some money, needing time away from the kids etc.

When you've worked hard to develop your career, you owe it to yourself not to step away from that naively. I want to spend a bit more time with my children while they are young but I can't abandon my career and just hope it and the job market will still be ready and waiting for me as and when I choose. TBH it's arrogant to think it will be - why would an employer want someone who's not worked for 2,3,4,5,10 years when there are plenty of other people who have been working during that time. So if I'm going to step away a little I need to be savvy about this and mitigate the risks to my career. There is still a huge risk that I will never achieve the career potential I could have if I'd stayed full time, but I am mitigating it as best I can and keeping an eye on the marketplace and my skills so I can step up the work if I need to before it's too late.

I had a successful career in L & D pre DC. I was a SAHM for 7 years, went back as soon as the youngest started school.

BUT - I didn't go back to what I was doing before. Same industry, but a lesser paid job, but nonetheless a very interesting one, part time, flexi hours, work from home. The last bit is key for me. I have no desire to go back to doing what I did before, even though the pay is better. I liked it whilst I did it and was good at it, but I've been there and done it, iykwim.

I am fulfilled, not stressed, well paid for the hours I do, and love the small company I work for. I feel very, very lucky to have found the job ( through a friend ) - but equally they are very, very lucky to have me as I bring a wealth of industry-relevant experience to the role.

I stopped work in 2002 as an academic (research/lecturing) in a university and am hoping to go for an interview to restart my career (at least part time) next week at another university.

I did keep up with my field in that 10 years by working for myself part time and continued to supervise two PhD students as well. I hope that will be enough to get my foot in the door as it is a very speclaist field and the job I am interviewing for is perfect for me.

They asked for explanations of any gaps in the CV so I hope 'SAHD caring for family' will be accepted as a valid reason. I'll let you know.

I think if you stop work completely and don't keep your skills up to date it must be near impossible to go back other than in a much lower paying position.

OP, my advice to you would be to take the opportunity to go back to work! You are so lucky to have this opportunity waiting for you, especially if you can request p/t hours.

By the end of my second ML I had no job to go back to, so I had to start looking for work from scratch. It was really hard trying to think myself into the level of confidence needed for the applications and interviews.

It would have been my dream to go back to an existing job at my previous level, with the option for part time hours. As it is I have been very lucky to get a great job relatively quickly, but at a lower salary than previous, and no option but to go full time. If I had tried to get a part time senior job I would be waiting forever, and likely would never recover my career.

My motivations very much included pension provision, as well as banking the ability to keep up my earning capacity for the future.

Good luck with the interview Morebeta!

Thank you. Lost my confidence a bit so I'll need it.

I started the thread linked to further up.

I have been a sahm for just over nine years - actually I took maternity leave and then a career break but then resigned my position.

We've recently moved areas, so I would be in a position of looking for work regardless iyswim, but I think tbh that as well as finding it difficult to go back after such an extended period of time, the current job market is such that everyone is in an equally difficult position and it is definitely an employer's market.

There are currently so few jobs and so many applicants that atm even if you are exactly what they're looking for you may not get an interview simply because most employers just can't interview everyone, and even experienced candidates are being overlooked.

I was talking to someone the other day who was telling me she'd applied for a pt admin post for which there were 137 applicants. An employer might interview ten of those, maybe twenty, but unlikely more than that. and the rest...? I imagine some application forms probably don't even get looked at in the current climate.

I have an added disadvantage in that I am visually impaired and that rules me out of some jobs. I can't go and work in tesco on a till for instance or become a TA in a school because I can't read a white board/children's work. e.g. I was sent a job yesterday for an admin post but an essential requirement was to have a valid driving licence, so my pool of jobs is slightly less, although I am applying for anything and everything that enters my inbox that I feel I am capable of.

Having said that I am starting a course in March and if it works out I will hopefully be starting my own business. I think that that is often the way to go - I will keep looking for jobs in the interim as businesses take time to build, however this feels like I am at least doing something.

I've never been a SAHM, but took 15 months off for my first period of maternity leave (going back 3 days per week after that) and 14 months the second time. I don't think I'd have got back into my career (law) at all if I hadn't continued to work during that time. I've been completely sidelined now even as a part timer, to try to progress from a 4 or 5 yr gap out of the workplace would be in my opinion virtually impossible. There may be some firms that would take you on but I'd guess at 99% want commitment to the profession / long hours in the office and anyone who isn't prepared to give that, and demonstrate that they've given that throughout goes on the "no thank you" pile.

Having said that, I have a very good friend who took 5 yrs out (not a lawyer) but took the opportunity to revisit what she wanted to do. She now has a job she really enjoys and it does fit in with her children etc.

Also watching with interest. Am a senior(ish) lawyer so have invested heavily in career. Returned to work when dd was one, now pg and wondering what to do after dc2.

Ideally would like to work two days in office, one or two days at home. I've been at the company almost six years, know the job, people etc and enjoy it. The money is reasonable given that I don't gave to do long hours, weekends etc anymore.

Full time for me would mean missing out on too much at home. Also the whole nursery thing is a hassle as it Is with one, and the fees are extortionate so it's working out if finically sensible. That having been said, so far, I'm enjoying be back at work and like to have a break as I find time at home far more tiring!

Hello, this is an interesting thread!
I've been a SAHM for over 7 years. I went back to work after dc1, and then we moved with dh's job when I was newly-pg with dc2. dc3 came along a bit sooner than intended, so I never got work in this area.
I was a research scientist before, heading more into science admin/business side of science.
And then when youngest dc was 2, I started to retrain as a solicitor. I'm now nearing the end of college, and need to find a training contract, which isn't easy. Since Christmas, I've started admin work (don't laugh) 4 hours a week for a local manufacturing business, which has great commercial experience, and e-commerce, and allows me to say on my CV that I am Employed, and they may be able to up the hours later. I'm also doing volunteer stuff for CAB and our police force, which is unpaid but good for my CV.
Not finding it easy at all to find full-time work as I'm over-qualified for most things other than a TC, which are like hen's teeth to get, but still plodding away at it.
Had my first paycheque in 7 years last week - a whopping £50, but it's a start!

Couldn't be helped because of the circumstances, but I really wouldn't have chosen to be a SAHM, and my life is so much fuller and happier since I started to get "back out there". I wish working mothers wouldn't be so hard on themselves - honestly, being a SAHM is not that fulfilling, if you're a career minded sort of gal.

Interesting thread. I can say it quite clearly, stopping work to focus on my family is the one and only regret I will ever have.

I left when I was at the top of my career to become a "trailing spouse". I didn't need to work as exh was earning well enough and in any case, I was working in a very specialised sector so there was absolutely nothing for me job wise in the places we landed. Even when I tried everything, sent 100s of CVs out, went into retraining and both times I graduated with honours, but there were no jobs for me in the area chosen by exh.

DS was born with a multitude of health problems that required some attention in the early years so I stopped looking for jobs for a couple of years, once I went into full search mode it was practically impossible for people to take me seriously with such CV gap. Whatever people say about equality, it doesn't matter how justified and good is for the mum to take care of the children, the lack of recent experience seriously hinders any job search.

I never recovered, I have been working for a few years in admin jobs which are lovely but dead ends, no career progression, in paper I am now no longer a manager, a lecturer, or whatever I was in the past. With luck I will get to what was my first professional salary 20 years ago in about 3 years time.

What makes the matters worse was that despite the career sacrifice on the family altar, once the marriage went down the drain, I have been left in such bad financial position that without the blessed tax credits DS and I would be living in the street. Obviously I'm not saying that your marriage will fail, but accidents happen and having a single income in the family is, now and to my view, a very irresponsible decision. Yes, I was there to suport my husband and to bake and take DS to the park... at the expense of not being able to provide for him as I should nowadays.

Interesting thread as I've returned recently from mat leave and am seriously considering giving up work as I'm not managing to juggle very well. There seems to be a lot more comments from people who regret not working than people who are glad and content with their decision to be a SAHM.

In RL, of the people I've spoken to, most who did give up work say they were glad they did (unless they're lying of course ), as despite their career maybe suffering, they got to spend more time with their LOs, which to them was more important than their career.

I'm a teacher. I enjoy my job but all of the outside classroom work is getting me down and I'm constantly doing hours and hours of extra work outside school which is really tricky fitting it in with DD. I'm desperate to give it up and be a SAHM but the thing stopping me hand in my notice is how will this impact my long term career, but then again, i have options that I won't bore you with , and in the future I feel I would regret personally if I felt I had been too stressed and tired and busy working and missed the early years of DD, but I wouldn't regret so much leaving work to be with her even if getting back to work is tricky. Maybe that's as I'm not as ambitious as some here. I'm a classroom teacher and happy with that, I have no need or yearning to be a head of key stage or other promotion.

I wonder if the bias towards regretting leaving jobs to be SAHM is indicative of women in general

I went back to work full time when ds was eight months. I was too scared of my career stagnating at a critical point ( had done the LPC and was looking for a training contract) to even consider part time. It was fine, I enjoy work and frankly the time to myself. Ds benefited from a lively and lovely childminder. I am on maternity leave for the second time and hope my firm will allow me to drop to 30 hours but if they say no I will have two options - go back full time or resign. So I would go back full time.

piglet. I think my actions have been influenced by my mothers experience - she came home to a note propped against the kettle after 24 years of marriage. Only the fact she had kept her hand in at work throughout, despite not really needing the money at the time, kept us from the gutter.

I really wanted to SAH but we would have had to give up our house. We decided I had to work, and it was really hard for a while. Now, I am so glad because I would not have found a job in this market. I teach too and still have the advantage of term time work which is great for my family long term. I think I was giving in to guilt at first, thinking I was being A Bad Working Mother, but thinking long term was definitely the right decision for all of us.

I'm a SAHM with no intention of returning to work anytime soon. Technically there is no career to return to. There is no way i could have my previous career and be a mother, as the job was a 'life' and one that did not cater for families or children.

I have re studied at Uni for a new career but am now pregnant with DC2 and living in yet another different country as a trailing spouse. So no present opportunity to make a new career work. My husband has a good job and earns a great salary so living on only one wage is not a problem. As for the future...maybe my husband will leave me, maybe he will loose his job, maybe i will be left careerless and on the streets alone. That is a risk i will just have to take. And i am quite prepared to take it. Right now i am doing the best thing for my marriage, my children and myself. We are very happy and i doubt there are many people out there who have all boxes ticked ie. Being there for children and husband, running a good home, having a great career, being in total control of my future financial earnings etc.

When the DCs are happy and settled in school i would like a second shot at a career, but i know i am taking the risk in the current job climate that that opportunity may never come knocking on my door.