Have you used your 13 weeks 'Parental Leave'?

[Mo2]

As you probably know, if you work and have a child under 5, you are legally entitled to take up to 13 weeks (unpaid) 'parental leave' in the first 5 years of his/her life.
I'd always assumed this was for emergencies etc, but was talking to friend recently who knows several people who have taken it just to spend more time with their kids in the early years.

I checked out the DTI website, and sure enough it does say "Parents can use it to spend more time with children and strike a better balance between their work and family commitments".

Just wondered if anyone had used any of their Parental Leave for this purpose and how their employer handled it?

The DTI link is here

DH took a week when dd was about 6 months old and was a SAHD for a week. We both took 2 days parental leave recently just to spend some time with dd, we took her out for lunch, to the tate modern, to playgroup, to music class, all the things we don't usually get to do with her.

It's a really good thing.

My dh has agreed with his employer that he will take 2 weeks a year for the first 5 years and the rest can be used on an ad-hoc basis eg if the nanny is sick or not available etc. My employer is happy for me to use it as and when, but we may well use a week to take an extended 3 week holiday with dd next year.

Unfortunately cannot afford to take unpaid leave but still pay for nursery. Even if it is an emergency will take paid leave (ie holiday) or make up the time on other days (work 3 days).

I have used a week this year. Work would be happy for me to take more but it's a cost issue. Like Bozza still have to pay for nursery. Will probably use more when DS in pre-school and we have school holidays to deal with.

DP not allowed to take more than his 25 days holiday. Has to take holiday when DS sick even (can't take unpaid). So I take all the time off as work seem surprisingly lax about me taking time off when DS sick.

I thought the Parental Leave had to be taken in 1 week chunks but the HR manager said no one would complain if I took less time at one go.

Freddiecat if your dh works in the UK he is entitled to this time, they can't say no. Of course they can make it difficult for him but he is entitled.

Some of my colleagues have negotiated taking it a day a week - if you have more than one child under five than it lasts quite a long time. I'm thinking of using this option when I return to work after maternity leave.

eefs, why would you use that option rather than use your right to work part time?

CD - I know but most companies won't let you use PL to take adhoc days unpaid to look after a sick child. We checked the DTI website and there's nothing saying that you can take unpaid leave to look after a sick child so them insisting he uses up his holiday is apparently OK.

Their arguement is that "no one else does that". However it's a male dominated company, and "generally" (and yes this is a generalisation) the burden of taking time off work for a sick child falls on the mother so they are not used to it. Plus we live no where near our parents so they could not help. most people round here ask their retired parents to help out but we can't.

He is planning to take 1 week PL next year to paint the house This does actually mean that he can spend his holidays with us - not doing DIY.

Oh sorry FreddieCat, I thought you meant that he couldn't take it at all!

Yes, DH did mention he might take a day's PL to watch a test match - told him to get off his arse and into work!!!

DH has taken PL, to work on the house, to help me after 2nd baby was born, to work on his own business and as extra holiday time.

DD is only 18 months but so far Dh and I haven't needed to.

Fortunately as a teacher I do get a number of days paid leave for emergencies - can't remember how many - maybe 5 days? or a little more? each year. I have used some of that last year. I work part time too so don't really need to for sepnding time with DD.

Dh uses his holiday time for spending time with DD; and his firm is reasonable if it comes to emergencies. He has never lost any day's pay yet, not even during the time DD was born.

I would be really reluctant to use it as it is unpaid. I did once say that I was ill to stay at home withh DD last year when she was poorly.

I haven't used it since I get plenty of holidays and work part time, and my work is very flexible about changing days around etc.
however it has been useful for dh - he took an extra week when ds was born (giving him 2 weeks off) - this time won't need to as now entitled to 2 weeks paternity leave. It was also a useful negotiating tool when he requested to reduce his hours to a 4 day week - it is agreed with the company that he won't take parental leave in addition to his reduced hours (though of course in extremis they couldn't enforce that).

Emergency leave for a sick child (or other emergency) is a bit different - you are entitled to leave work to care for someone in an emergency. PL isn't meant to replace this right, it is additional (and employers can insist that it is taken in blocks of one week). However I believe you can only take enough time under the emergency leave to put into place alternative arrangements, so not sure how it would work in practice.

I used four days this summer and it was fine but don't like taking unpaid leave if I can help it! Dh took holidays for the week and we had a great time with ds doing things in central London which we normally don't do (take London for granted because we live in London).

Don't normally need to take parental leave as work are pretty flexible and I get enough annual leave but this summer was an exceptional one as ds's childminder was away for five of the six weeks of summer holidays.