Bank switched account to husbands name

[GreenFootstool]

We have a joint account for household stuff. I opened the account five years ago, set up all the direct debits etc and put myself as primary contact because DH is very dyslexic and so I do 100% of the household paperwork.

He also deploys for months of the year, so I am primary contact for every bill and account we have.

We don't have debit cards, just use it as a billing and savings account with a packaged deal for phone cover, travel insurance etc.

All our statements are online, so I've never really looked at the names before but I've just had to claim on the insurance and it's all been switched to his bloody name!!

FWIW my name is also the earlier letter of the alphabet so it's not about that.

I'm really cross. I've contacted them to ask for an explanation and said it needs to be changed back. It's clearly sexism at play with the Mr name taking priority when I'm the only bloody person that manages it.

I thought we were past this nonsense in 2026 but clearly not.

It's more the architecture that programmers have to build on.

Complain away (you think I haven't for 40+ years ?).

Things are only going to get worse, as "AI" hoovers up all that legacy code and treats it like the word of God.

I think that must be breaking all sorts of regulations as the credit card agreement is with you.

I can't even get a copy of my mum's credit card statements under power of attorney, as they insist that statements can only be sent to the primary cardholder.

Recently on holiday and received an invitation to a wine tasting as Mr and Mrs Husband'sFirstName Surname.

I went to reception and told them it was the 21st century and I have a first name of my own and expect them to use it.

Today. My car, registered keeper, only driver, arranging service. All agreed with a service bot via email. Service department sent confirmation of date to husband when specifically told not to.

Infuriating, isn't it ?

Service department sent confirmation of date to husband when specifically told not to.

A breach of GDPR. Imagine if people took that seriously.

I've not experienced this recently and our council tax is actually in the name of Mrs Igel Kott and Mr Igel Kott which is quite amazing.

But I mentioned on another thread recently that I had the "we're only speaking to Mr because his name is first on the account" at NTL (which became Virgin Media) but I got around that by threatening to cancel the DD if they refused to speak to me.

Although 02 decided that I was Mr rather than Mrs, even though my first name is very female and isn't unisex...

😱

Back in the heady days of the 90s, when banks and building societies handed out bonuses and share certificates like confetti, they always went to the first named person on the account, who was always ... (Guess).

DH and I treat all assets as shared, so him getting all the shares was OK, but I'm sure there were thousands of couples where the men pocketed the shares for themselves. It can make a real difference, not just symbolic.

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Hey, no issue with your being happy with it - I'd assume that anyway, you're presumably not using it coz you're unhappy with it!

What I do find odd in contrast is the "proud" lingo that implies some kind of achievement. Proud of what? Having bagged a husband? Is there some kind of superiority inherent in that?

That's when I tell them "if using Ms is too hard for you feel free to use Dr". All those years labouring for an earned doctorate have to be good for something 🤣🤣🤣

French banks are just as bad. I opened a French bank account only for it to be Madame surname DH first name. I complained but they just shrugged their shoulders.

OMG are they STILL doing this? I remember my mother complaining about the same thing in the 80s. They had shared finances, but she inherited her father's house, couldn't sell it so rented it out, and she opened a (I think it was Halifax) account in her name for the rent to go into. Eventually my Dad asked if it could be joint as he had contributed to repairs and furnishings and buying my uncle's share of the property, so she made it a joint account - and yes they put his name first and sent all the correspondence to him.

When she phoned to complain and ask why they had done this, they said it was a matter of courtesy - courtesy to whom ffs? She said it didn't feel very courteous to her, but they wouldn't change it. It seems that forty years on and we are still having the same problems and the banks are still in the dark ages.