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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The Bluestocking Inn, cocktails and cocoa and all

1000 replies

DeanElderberry · 22/02/2026 17:10

Opening soon in a salubrious location.

And thanks to the miraculous qualities, although we will indeed have

One-steps and two-steps and the divil knows what new steps
We know that we never would be dull again, bedad
We'll have wine, porter and lemonade.
We'll have cocktails and cocoa and all
We'll have champagnes tonight
But NO real pains next morning
Tonight when we dance at the Bluestocking Ball

slight apologies to Frank Harte

OP posts:
Thread gallery
140
Magpiecomplex · 01/03/2026 17:49

Regarding the clumpy shoes @MarieDeGournay, all the better to kick annoying people with. Like, for example, authors doing a character assassination on you.

WearyAuldWumman · 01/03/2026 17:58

DeanElderberry · 01/03/2026 17:05

As spring advances I've been noticing I have Great Tits.

Coal tits in my cherry tree, but no pics.

Chersfrozenface · 01/03/2026 18:04

Magpiecomplex · 01/03/2026 17:38

Will this do, Cher? Sounds like you need it Flowers
And a sympathy camel and dromedary too 🐪🐫

Thank you very much, Maggers. See you when I regain consciousness.

Britinme · 01/03/2026 18:33

I saw Shakespeare fritillary and thought I was probably too ignorant to be familiar with it. I have shared this image before - it's my own particular chickadee with a suffragette mohawk.

Britinme · 01/03/2026 18:34

Dammit no image appeared! Trying again...

The Bluestocking Inn, cocktails and cocoa and all
MarieDeGournay · 01/03/2026 18:53

I'm just popping in to say I can't stay for long, and I see that lots of you have said lots of things I would normally respond to. By the time I pop in again later, there'll be even more things I would normally respond to and even less likelihood I'll be able to catch up with them all😒Not ignoring youSmile

So Flowers for Cher, for your loss, and hugs for anyone else who needs one. Or even who would just like a hug
Laters, 🐊s

lcakethereforeIam · 01/03/2026 18:57

DeanElderberry · 01/03/2026 16:54

tch, I went and googled 'Shakespeare fritillaries' and decided they must be those splendid Crown Imperials that I'm too cheapskate to buy.

V fond of the snakesheads, mine haven't opened yet.

Sorry. They do sound rather grand. I'm not a fan of the Crown Imperials, at least not the shades of yellow and orange I've seen. I rather like some of the other smaller species (whose names escape me) although I've never tried growing them.

MyrtleLion · 01/03/2026 19:40

Loving the long line of gerbils with drinks!

I have a rotator cuff injury on my left shoulder which is very very sore. The Walrus has helpfully massaged it, even though it is agony. But it helps. It also helps to take painkillers but I'm quite forgetful (probably ADHD) so I've only just taken two ibuprofen.

I also planned to do.a Right to Choose three weeks ago but haven't got round to it...

DeanElderberry · 01/03/2026 19:42

I'm not sure what that is Myrtle, but it sounds like something to be careful about.

OP posts:
MyrtleLion · 01/03/2026 20:17

DeanElderberry · 01/03/2026 19:42

I'm not sure what that is Myrtle, but it sounds like something to be careful about.

The rotator cuff is a group of muscles and tendons that surround the shoulder joint. These muscles keep the ball of the upper arm bone firmly within the shallow socket of the shoulder. A rotator cuff injury can cause a dull ache in the shoulder that worsens at night.

I had one on the right hand side a couple of years ago.

It's very sore but it should get better on its own. If not I'll call the physio team in a week and see what they see.

EmpressaurusKitty · 01/03/2026 20:24

We’d like to offer the services of Kitty’s sympathy dragon, Cerys Tiamat, & her support dog Matilda to anyone who might benefit from them, as well as Bertram the sympathy camel.

The Bluestocking Inn, cocktails and cocoa and all
NotAtMyAge · 01/03/2026 21:29

PastaAllaNorma · 01/03/2026 17:15

We had them in the woods behind our house when I lived in Canada. Gorgeous wee birds named after their call "chickadee-dee-dee"

My snakehead fritillaries haven't sprouted at all yet but at least the tete a tetes are in bloom in time for Dewi Sant.

As for feeling better - I just need to get old enough for the NHS to agree to my knee replacement. It's been bone on bone for over 10 years.

As for feeling better - I just need to get old enough for the NHS to agree to my knee replacement. It's been bone on bone for over 10 years.

That's inexcusable! Our vicar had both knees replaced in her mid 50s, because she could barely walk at all. How can age be a factor when a bad knee is so painful and disabling?

EdithStourton · 01/03/2026 21:39

DeanElderberry · 01/03/2026 17:05

As spring advances I've been noticing I have Great Tits.

Alright for some.
Get thee to Bravissimo, and I will queue up for the SMALL boobed ladies' day at the mammo clinic.

And thanks to @RumNotRun for the tractor pic. I saw an ancient Ford trundling around the other day, but not as ancient as that one.

EdithStourton · 01/03/2026 21:48

Apparently knees can only be done once, but still...

I know an old geezer whose second knees are shot to shit, which stops him jumping ditches the way he would like. Which indicates to me that he wore them out by, er, jumping ditches.

Marie, I am a great fan of clumpy shoes. At this time of year I mostly switch between wellies and a pair of men's ankle boots. They are all clumpy and very comfortable.

Brit, I hope your drug kick in in time for you to enjoy your evening out.

And Cher, I'm sorry life is so stressful at the moment.

AuntieMsDamsonCrumble · 01/03/2026 21:52

The thread has run away from me again. I've been out for most of the day visiting relatives and just managed to skim through the posts. Lovely to hear about all the harbingers of Spring - including the tractors😁

I know it is Spring because the council are suddenly going hell-for-leather doing roadworks before the end of the financial year.

I had a rotator cuff injury a few years back. The physio did sort it out, but it still likes to remind me whenever I need to do a job that requires my arms to be raised for any length of time, such as hanging new curtains.

Sending sympathies and joint-soothing vibes to those who need them - Pasta, Cake, Myrtle and WAW plus anyone else who is experiencing pain. I'm sure this up-and-down weather doesn't help and woe betide the next doctor who tries to tell me otherwise!

I think I would like a hot chocolate laced with Tia Maria as my nightcap please, bar-gerbil.

NotAtMyAge · 01/03/2026 22:22

Well, I forgot to buy Welsh cakes and didn't get round to making bara brith, but there are tete-a-tete daffodils on the kitchen windowsill and I did make some very tasty leek and potato soup for supper on Dydd Dewi Sant, so I feel the day was fittingly marked after all.

Off to bed now after last night was punctuated by a very long wakeful period, so hoping the Sleep Gerbil in particular is on duty now.

Britinme · 02/03/2026 03:37

My birthday dinner was delicious, and as it’s Maine Restaurant Week starting today (which is why it’s a day late…) a prix fixe menu. I had a vegan chestnut bisque with roasted mushrooms (finely chopped, salty and crunchy, scattered on top, followed by scallops on a roast beet puree with crispy prosciutto bits and some other veggies (small helping but extremely tasty) followed by a vegan chocolate mousse with a pistachio custard and raspberries and toasted curried almonds (which sounds weird but they were just slightly spicy). I’m on antibiotics so no alcohol so I had a Phony Negroni with it. It was a fine dining treat.

ErrolTheDragon · 02/03/2026 07:18

That sounds lovely, Brit.

AuntieMsDamsonCrumble · 02/03/2026 07:36

I'm glad you managed to get to your lovely meal @Britinme and it sounded delicious.

On the UTI front, after several bouts a few years ago, I found cranberry juice, or better still, capsules (more concentrated) help to fend off recurrences, although they are not a cure if you already have the UTI. These days, I make my own muesli, which includes dried cranberries.

DeanElderberry · 02/03/2026 07:42

That sounds like a wonderful birthday meal. Blue sky and bird song here, and I was very brave and had a shower, so all set for a crafty morning.

OP posts:
EmpressaurusKitty · 02/03/2026 07:46

That sounds fabulous, @Britinme. I’m so glad you had a good time.

EmpressaurusKitty · 02/03/2026 10:49

Thank you to everyone who told me having a mammogram would be fine.

I was in & out in under 15 minutes, all the staff I saw were female & it never went beyond a bit umcomfortable, so now I’m celebrating with cake.

MarieDeGournay · 02/03/2026 11:44

EmpressaurusKitty · 02/03/2026 10:49

Thank you to everyone who told me having a mammogram would be fine.

I was in & out in under 15 minutes, all the staff I saw were female & it never went beyond a bit umcomfortable, so now I’m celebrating with cake.

That's great news, EmpressaurusKitty, I hope our words of wisdom and experience meant that you went into it feeling a bit less apprehensive.
Enjoy the cake, you've earned itWink

Your birthday meal sounds wonderful, Britinme, it's great you were well enough to go out and celebrate in such style!

As Damson put it: 'the thread has run away from me' so I know I'm missing a lot of individual stuff - hoping everybody feels better this morning, whether from physical troubles, or other people being 😠to you💙

One thing I wanted to pick up on was Deano's comment about Jenny Diski - I know nothing about her, never read anything by her or about her, but what Deano said certainly coincides with the MdeG novel - it was really dark, and she seemed to really enjoy making it darker and darker bleaker and bleaker and nastier and nastier ..
I wasn't expecting hagiography [I know I'm not perfect, and not everyone at Court appreciates my choice of footwearWink] but...

I'm looking forward to reading the academic book on MdeG as 'philosophe morale et politique'.

EmpressaurusKitty · 02/03/2026 11:59

That's great news, EmpressaurusKitty, I hope our words of wisdom and experience meant that you went into it feeling a bit less apprehensive.
Enjoy the cake, you've earned it

Thanks @MarieDeGournay & yes, Theo definitely did! I couldn’t believe how quickly it was over.

MarieDeGournay · 02/03/2026 12:02

Yesterday I did some 'tidying' of books which of course quickly became reading them🙄
I picked one up, opened it at random and there was 'Fair daffodils we weep to see you haste away so soon' - it was a copy of Herrick's poetry that I forgot I had.
I'm not going to quote that poem cos it's one of those 'yeah they look nice but any day now they'll be dead and so will you'. Since it was in his religious phase, he didn't add the usual 'So since you're going to be as dead as an ex-daff soon anyway, darlin', how's about a shag?'😄

I liked this poem, it's along the same lines as the verse by Sedulius Scotus (840–860)
Techt do Róim,
mór saítho, becc torbai;
in Rí con-daigi i foss,
manim bera latt ní fhogbai.

A going to Rome:
A great trouble, a small profit!
The king who you seek here at home,
Unless you carry him with you, you will not find him.

and the Yiddish proverb: 'Nearer to the Synagogue, farther from God'

To Keep a True Lent - Robert Herrick

Is this a fast, to keep
The larder lean?
And clean
From fat of veals and sheep?

Is it to quit the dish
Of flesh, yet still
To fill
The platter high with fish?

Is it to fast an hour,
Or ragg'd to go,
Or show
A downcast look and sour?

No; 'tis a fast to dole
Thy sheaf of wheat,
And meat,
Unto the hungry soul.

It is to fast from strife,
From old debate
And hate;
To circumcise thy life.

To show a heart grief-rent;
To starve thy sin,
Not bin;
And that's to keep thy Lent.

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