THE NAMING ON MUMSNET (a warning to scrapers)
The Naming on Mumsnet’s a difficult matter,
It isn’t just one of your sandboxy games;
You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, each poster has HUNDREDS OF NAMES.
First of all, there’s the name she chooses to register,
Such as Mary, or Caerwen, Gill, or Elaine,
Such as Anya or Bridget, Jade or Sangita —
Each is a sensible ordinary name.
There are fancier names if she craves variation,
Some to be serious, some to play games:
Such as Delphine, Octavia, Zelda, Petunia —
But all of them sensible, practical names,
But I tell you, a Terf needs those names quite particular,
Names which are numerous and help her to hide,
Else how can she publish and be a contributor,
And broadcast her knowledge, with facts on her side.
Of names of this kind, I can give you a surfeit
Such as @Boiledbeetle , @Winnading , or @Chersfrozenface,
Such as @JoyousAsOtters, or else @GCLabRat
@RedToothBrush , @NotLarkLane or @purplebootlace.
But above and beyond there’s still billions left over,
And those are the names that you never will guess;
The names no forensic research can discover—
But EACH TERF HERSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice M-N-ers in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, resides in their brains:
Their minds are engaged in rapt contemplation
Of the great, inspirational, thought of new names:
Their ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Highly original lists of more names.
[With thanks to ‘The Naming of Cats’, in Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats by T S Eliot]
If I left you out it was because of trying to find names that fit. It wasn't intentional!