"Lancing soft play boss speaks after adult event seen on fetish site"

[SpicyMoth]

I honest to god have no words.... I knew Lancing had gone into steep decline over the years but not to the extent where they'd have to resort to this to get some money in!

https://www.theargus.co.uk/news/24104618.lancing-soft-play-boss-speaks-adult-event-seen-fetish-site/?ref=socialflow&fbclid=IwAR2azqGaV1DcoPvWRye2zdyHDuXtTdtGCeTgSi4jcpUwGvwjtVqNn2Js4CI

It's all well and good not to "kink shame" but surely society has to draw the line bloody SOMEWHERE?!

Also, imagine pretending not to know that this has anything to do with kink and fetish?!

Oh dear. That's grim. At least they asked the staff and gave them a choice whether to work there during this or not.

If the owners didn't see the "connection" between this event and fetish/kink/sexual then did they not at any point ask themselves why these adults want to behave in this way?? What did they think it was for??

There's not enough cleaning in the world that would be enough for me to take a small child there after that event.

I mean, soft plays are already covered in poo, wee, sick and drool so..........

Oops! Dreadful business decision. At least the owners banned sexual acts and faeces from the CHILDREN’S soft play area…

"The over-25s event offered a “nappy change room”, baby food and “a lovely story time” with milk and biscuits, but organisers reminded attendees to bring their own nappies and wipes."

Yet apparently no sexual stuff happened.

Who was changing and wiping these adult baby-LARPers?? Apparently "Carers, daddies and mummies" were invited, so presumably they were??

Fucking disgusting to happen in a kid's venue.

I'm pretty sure there's at least one bodily fluid that likely ended up on some of the ball pit balls that would never be seen in a soft play normally. And the fact that some of these adults will be getting off on the fact that this is the case.

I feel physically sick.

Though one close to me has adult nights, openly advertised and it's full of older teens and young adults- no fetish needed!

Nothing wrong with wanting to go to one as an adult, just leave the bizarre behaviour and costumes at home!

The over-25s event offered a “nappy change room”, baby food and “a lovely story time” with milk and biscuits, but organisers reminded attendees to bring their own nappies and wipes.

“Although the event was not at all sexual, kinky or fetish based,

Idiots. They shouldn't be in charge of their own toothbrush, let alone anything else.

Bosses at the play centre, in Chartwell Road, Lancing, said that it understands an adult dressing in a nappy “is not socially accepted by many”, but it was not until “after the first event we were made aware of the community’s link to fetish and kink groups”

Liars. Why should adult nappies be socially unacceptable, then?

It's all well and good not to "kink shame" but surely society has to draw the line bloody SOMEWHERE?!

I'd argue that the line should be drawn well short of anything that could be construed as harmful in any way to anyone.

My socially-liberal instincts leap to agree with people when they say that if they're not harming anyone else, they shouldn't be shamed. Whatever my personal feelings on an activity, my automatic position would be that if there's no harm, there should be no shame, disapproval or taboo, and that what people do in private or in agreed venues (and with consenting others) shouldn't be the subject of opprobrium.

But with kink, fetishes, and other sexual turn-ons, tabooness — something being forbidden and naughty — is a big part of what gets some people going and gets them off. If we create a society where the only things which are truly taboo, and the only things which are considered disgusting and shameful, are things which actually merit taboo, disgust and shame because they're harmful to others, that means that anyone who needs taboo or shame to get off is pushed towards things that are actually harmful.

So despite my socially liberal leanings, my pragmatic side suggests that it's a social good for people to have access to a wide array of shameful, taboo, but ultimately harmless sexual pursuits, and therefore we should societally continue to ridicule, criticise and disapprove of certain harmless fetishes and deviances where part of the appeal for some people is the shame, humiliation, or risk of being caught.

(Obviously this wouldn't include things like sexual orientation, where shame makes no difference to it and only causes suffering.)

So why add other bodily fluids unrelated to children?

If the owners didn't see the "connection" between this event and fetish/kink/sexual then did they not at any point ask themselves why these adults want to behave in this way?? What did they think it was for??

They'll have been fed a load of stuff about age regression. (And how could anyone possibly confuse CGL & GGLRE; the absolute bigotry [etc] 🤦‍♀️)

So I am not allowed to point out the comorbids here?

Yeah, of course all the people attending were using it as a therapeutic session to address trauma....

A children's play centre sees no problem with inviting adult fetish organisations to use the children's facilities? It makes you wonder what other social or safeguarding boundaries they're choosing to ignore.

Try again. Linguistically gymnasticate yourself to avoid deletion.

(I might trademark that).

Weird.

I don’t see why they don’t have the event in an adult venue and “theme” the venue the way they want it. I’m sorry but cynically I think it’s because these adults get off in being in a real children’s space. Any suggestion that this is therapy is BS. I have heard of therapy that involves regression type behaviour but this screams kink and not therapy. any link between sex and childlike behaviour/items etc makes me highly uncomfortable…as it should anyone.

If the event was in no way sexual then why the need arrange via the odd message app (can’t remember the name). Why the need to specify no wet accidents….adults should know wetting in a child’s space is not ok….normal adults don’t need that specified (continence issues obviously separate).

At least they've made it easier for private detectives / blackmailer, etc

I wonder what the security vetting services would say? Someone could lose their job.

They do it on purpose, Lynn!

This is vile! To be honest I'm fine fine with perverted grown men who want to wear nappies and get off on the thought of being babies, being kink shamed. Fucking weirdos.

Of course they are, but it's more the fact that those in attendance are more than likely getting off just on the pure fact that they're engaging with things children engage with on a regular basis.
If this was a soft play venue that has been created solely for adults, and had only ever been used by adults for example, I highly doubt they'd be as "into it"

Some extreme examples here for the sake of making a point, but it's one thing for someone with this type of fetish to go out and buy themself a children's toy to shove up their ass, it's another thing entirely to steal something that you know a child is/has actively played with to shove up their ass.

The same way it's one thing for a bloke to buy himself some brand new lacey knickers to wear(To reference some M&S reviews), and it's another entirely to nick your sister's or even mother's pants!

It's the "use" that makes it more "thrilling".

Typing this has made me feel absolutely disgusting, feel like I need a 4 hour long Dettol bath after that! 😷

Totally agree and it’s a disgrace the venue allowed it. I hope the local families vote with their feet.

"I don’t see why they don’t have the event in an adult venue and “theme” the venue the way they want it. "

It's not impossible for them to do that, even within the exact area Lancing Manor has a very large sporting hall which people will rent for bouncy castles as just one example. Hell even the bloody Parish Hall has a room I'd expect would be big enough!

The only logical reason I can think of as to why they don't want to do that, is that they specifically want their event to be in a place which has actual children in attendance and interacting with the venue at some point.
They'd argue, I imagine, for "authenticity".
The actual reason I imagine is more in line with my previous comment re; thrill.
It's grim imo.

Quote from Springer: link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-023-02564-z

Adult baby/diaper lovers (AB/DLs) enjoy role-playing as babies and/or wearing diapers. They also engage in other related activities, such as urinating or defecating themselves and having an adult care for them. Previous surveys have revealed that AB/DLs commonly report sexual motivation, a finding that is corroborated by case reports in the psychiatric literature and some media interviews. The fact that AB/DLs change their appearance and behavior to become more like babies raises the possibility that they have an erotic target identity inversion (ETII). In ETIIs, a person’s external erotic target is inverted into the self, resulting in sexual arousal by the fantasy of being a member of the target class or by imitating one. If AB/DLs are sexually motivated by an ETII, they should experience both sexual attraction to babies and sexual arousal by the fantasy of being a baby. We surveyed 207 male AB/DLs recruited from the Internet about their sexual orientation, sexual motivation, and sexual interests for a primarily quantitative analysis. Consistent with past research, a substantial minority of participants reported non-heterosexual identities (42%), and a large majority reported some degree of sexual motivation for being AB/DLs (93%). Wearing diapers and urinating or defecating oneself were rated as especially sexual. Even though 40% of participants reported sexual arousal by the fantasy of being a baby, only 4% reported sexual attraction to babies. This pattern of results is contrary to predictions from the concept of ETIIs. Instead, participants indicated that physical or mental pain, humiliation, and an adult woman were important to their sexual fantasies of being a baby. Masochism appears to be a promising alternative to an ETII for explaining the sexual motivation of AB/DLs.

It is a paraphilia, sometimes known as auto-nepiophilia, or paraphilic infantilism.

Another quote:
Paraphilias are recurrent, persistent, and intense sexual interests in atypical objects or activities. The most commonly encountered paraphilias in sexological or forensic settings are pedophilia, sexual sadism, exhibitionism, and voyeurism. Paraphilias are often comorbid with other sexual, mood, and personality disorders. Assessment and diagnosis require an integration of multiple sources of clinical information, given the limits and biases of self-report (through clinical interview or questionnaires). Clinicians ideally have access to more objective assessment methods, such as phallometric testing of sexual arousal. The accurate assessment and diagnosis of paraphilias is essential to effective treatment and management.

i'm all for spelling these things out, now.

Gone are the days when we can euphemistically talk about something, because it would appear, people just aren't understanding it.

Possibly deliberately.

Any soft play centre that doesn't understand adult baby nappy wearing is a sexual fetish have got to be either fucking kidding me, or they have a naivety problem that means they shouldn't be running it.

The more explicit people are about these fetishes, the better.