man in women's changing rooms

[cherryblossomwoman]

Hi All,
I'd like some advice on the situation please:

I am a member at a gym and I go swimming at one of the clubs. I recently noticed a new life guard on duty at the pool. This life guard looks like a man with bright lipstick and long hair. I didn't think much of it until I noticed him entering the ladies' changing rooms and showers. He wasn't changing at that moment, just walking through. For clarification - this is definitely a male person, who has a man's appearance and voice, so not just a masculine-looking woman.

The changing rooms are all open space and there are only a few cubicles for changing, most women change near the lockers where there is no privacy from others. Also, the access to women's toilets are through the changing room only.

I do not like and do not understand this situation and I want to make it clear to the gym management. Particularly I am no longer comfortable brining my teenage daughter to swimming at that gym.

Any advice how to go about it? Any similar experiences?

1. Check the gym's policy on male staff entering the women's changing and showers. I would imagine it's that they shouldn't.
2. Make a complaint. Just be completely factual about it. Don't make any assumptions about this blokes gender identity- simply state that the male person on duty at x time entered the women's changing rooms, seemingly just to look around.
3. If they dig in and have a policy of male staff being allowed in the women's falicities (without a good reason and chance for women to cover up) then end your membership and cite breach of contract.

Is this a David Lloyd club?

Or virgin active? They told me men could get their penis out in the changing rooms in front of my daughters when I asked them to clarify. And I did ask that specific question and they said yes.

That is good to know @Norma27 I am looking for a gym for myself and my teenage daughters to join. I had hoped that the members type clubs would care more about their members than pandering to fashionable minority ideologies. Apparently not! I will strike virgin active off the list!

I may as well stick with the local council run leisure centres in that case!

Are you absolutely sure too eg check Adam's apple.

I have a female (definitely female) who got accused of being trans, she's 6'1 and fairly masculine in build, but has given birth! You don't want to get this wrong. They only walked through

I've encountered a trans woman in open changing rooms years ago, long before the current epidemic, hardly a new phenomenon, did shock me at seeing a naked man there but they kept themselves to themselves.

I would not be happy with this either. As someone has said,yes just be factual. Good luck.

The problem with raising that a man was in the changing rooms is that they may well say 'no there wasnt' if the bloke says hes a woman

Look at the issues with the woman that was raped on a ward where the hospital denied there were any men. They denied there were men on the ward because the man that raped her was identifying as a woman

Put a complaint in.

I'm sure this would make many women feel uncomfortable.

We had a similar situation in work whereby a man transitioning in to a woman asked which shower rooms to use. The outcome was that we told him he could use whichever shower room he/she liked.
I followed orders and told her that, but personally, I think that's quite wrong.

There were a lot of complaints.

I was gutted as I had been a member there 14 years. They lost 4 memberships that day.

It is a Virgin Active gym. @gogohmm yes definitely a man.
I expect that if I complain they will come up with some justification on tolerance/diversity/equality but I will do it nevertheless. This cannot just go down unchallenged. I imagine that I am not the only one who may be uncomfortable with this, so I am planning to post it on a local community social media site. Maybe if we generate enough noise something will happen...

@cherryblossomwoman I’m 100% sure you won’t be the only one who feels uncomfortable.

@cherryblossomwoman use the term male not man. Reference this study https://fairplayforwomen.com/unisex-changing-rooms-put-women-in-danger/

Most council run gyms (where they haven't been hived off to private providers) are totally captured. Worth checking the policies of your local ones, though.

I know Bannatyne's gyms had genuinely single sex changing rooms in July last year, I imagine they still do. Again, worth checking if there's one you can get to.

I’m sure you are right about the council leisure centres being completely captured but if we come across any male staff or customers in the women’s changing rooms or toilets we will just stop going and try to figure out exercise at home despite the constraints of space and equipment and the fact that it is harder to find motivation. We’ll miss swimming too.

If I am stretching myself to pay for a private members club and tying myself into 12 month contracts, I expect women’s only changing rooms and toilets, for my sex to be respected, to have privacy and dignity when changing and to feel and be safe.

I would definitely opt for Bannatyne if I lived near one.

I've got the impression Duncan Bannatyne doesn't buy into any of the gi crap so his gyms are probably a good bet for respecting single sex changing etc.

I seem to recall that Duncan Bannatyne explicitly said that single sex would mean single sex in his gyms, Baldieheid.

Good to know. Pity I can't afford it, but I would if I could.

We women need to spend our money wisely. Businesses that offer me less (privacy, safety, dignity) than they offer to their male customers just don't get my money. Its discrimination, and I can do it too.