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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Missive from a London local authority to its employees

34 replies

NeeshyOne · 22/01/2023 11:05

We are all aware of how damaging it can be for individuals to be misgendered. Misgendering can damage someone’s self-confidence as well as having an impact on an individual’s mental health.
Getting someone’s pronoun right promotes inclusivity and helps all people feel seen and recognised.
As part of our council wide drive to equality we have been considering how we can best minute our formal meetings.

We will review this to see how its working but we will try to apply the right pronouns and when we are not aware of this will either use neutral pronouns, job titles or full names. We will not assume pronouns from appearance.

Lots of us have started to sign off our emails with our pronouns and wear badges which is obviously helpful. However this is not universal and a matter of personal choice. I would however be grateful if you could drop me a note letting me know your pronouns. We will hold this data securely and for this purpose only. This is obviously not compulsory but as explained without this we will use neutral terms, jobs titles or full names. Which we choose will sometimes depend on the grammar (clarity remains a primary driver for us) but we will look to ensure we properly reflect in particular contributions by women.

I attach a guide (from Stonewall) to pronouns generally and changing your email signatures.

END

I work with this LA, not for them. But I am seriously pissed off with it, especially the continued use of Stonewall as some sort of benchmark for best practice, rather than a politicised lobbying group pushing an ideology. Is there any point in challenging it? How?

OP posts:
BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn · 22/01/2023 18:33

"We will hold this data securely and for this purpose only." - so, only for use in the minutes of meetings?

But they aren't going to keep the resulting minutes secret, are they? So by circulating the minutes they will be telling everyone this 'secure' data.

It's almost as if they've not thought this through.

eurochick · 22/01/2023 18:50

Ereshkigalangcleg · 22/01/2023 11:11

We are all aware of how damaging it can be for individuals to be misgendered.

Are we?

Quite. I have a name that is obviously female to most Europeans but I work with people from all over the world. I get lots of emails addressed to Mr [my name]. I have not found this damaging or distressing.

Boiledbeetle · 22/01/2023 19:36

I used to hold many meetings, and did my own minutes as it was quicker.

Revise drainage layout third floor Action ITH by 1/2/23

Chase Building Control for next inspection date action FS by 19/1/23

It's not Fucking rocket science (although I'd bet in a meeting o f rocket scientists they probably do the same as me)🚀

JanesLittleGirl · 22/01/2023 22:14

Ain't ever seen a pronoun in a set of minutes. Action; owner; due date.

Boiledbeetle · 22/01/2023 22:33

@JanesLittleGirl I know Right! I mean it's been a while for me but I figured my example above was still the standard.

Why would you use pronouns? Minutes is about actually recording who said what.And what needs doing.

You put their names at the start with their initials and you use the initials throughout so that no-one misses anything they need to do. And anything anyone says is attributed to the initials of the person who spoke.

Reallybadidea · 22/01/2023 22:40

I would reply that you have no problem with being misgendered and therefore you have no preferred pronouns.

nepeta · 23/01/2023 20:15

I wonder why being misgendered or deadnamed is assumed to be so damaging and horrible. I understand that it is rude if done on purpose by someone knowing that the person doesn't want that name or those pronouns used, but why would its effect be so devastating?

If you know, deep inside, who you are, and if this identity is inherent and immutable, then why does it matter so much to receive external validation?

I am trying to relate this to something in my own experiences, such as what triggered my PTSD in the past when it wasn't yet treated (certain faces, smells, sounds). But surely the society isn't expected to change for my sake? So when can the society be expected to do that?

Boiledbeetle · 23/01/2023 20:35

If push comes to shove and you have to give them i have the perfect pronouns for you

supercalifragilistic/Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

Forgotthebins · 24/01/2023 13:01

Well that’s clear as mud isn’t it.

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