Autistic teen and trans issues

[Apparentlychilled]

My autistic 15 year old DD has started to wonder about being trans (agender. And yes, I had to look that up). My view is that she's wondering who she is. Probably because she's a teenager and autistic. Can anyone recommend books/articles/websites to discuss feminism, identity, teen identity etc?

When she came out a few years ago, it didn't phase either DH or I. But this feels different and it feels a bit like a band wagon she's jumping on, and I think it's more about identity and her sense of self. We've talked about how our sense of self can evolve and that being a teen is all about figuring out who you are. And yes, I'm aware that there seems to be a high rate of autistic teens amongst those who transition.

She's an avid reader so I think it might be helpful to casually leave some articles or books lying around, so that she's not just getting her information from her friends/the echo chamber of social media and YouTube.

Hi, depending on how mature she is, possibly Helen Joyce's book Trans might do the trick- Helen was on GMB this morning (you can see it in YouTube, if, as I would, you want to check her out first) or the film Adult Human Female I'm not aware of any books or films specifically aimed at young people with autism, but maybe another MNetter might be able to help?

Thanks @pottydimley - will check her out.

This might be of use?

mybodyisme.com/product/sex-and-gender/

I don't really have any good suggestions for your DD, sorry.

Bayswater support are good if you're not leaping to affirmation. They might be able to suuggest something, and they have some good advice on their website about how to talk to teens.

Also for parents (not teens themselves), I found Stella O'Malley and Sasha Ayad's podcast series "Gender - A Wder Lens" well worth listening to though there are a lot of episodes by now! It's on YouTube.

Most autism charities and online communities are absolutely captured despite the glaring red flags, so try to limit internet access if you can.

This is absolutely typical of autistic teens, to the point where there should be warnings and better ways of supporting available, if only organisations were full of adults who actually gave a shit about safeguarding!

My autistic daughter isn’t trans, but has a variety of MH issues that manifest in the same way as trans issues do. It’s an awful lot about identity, not fitting in, pressure to fit a certain ideal (gender stereotypes, body image, personality). There is a level
of delusional thinking which is very difficult to deal with, but my approach tends to be never to accept the delusion.

Thanks all! Really appreciate it. 🙏