I am embracing virtue signalling pronouns in emails

[MsFogi]

I have realised I have made too many assumptions about gender over the years. I had always assumed that Paul (name changed of course) in my company was a man simply on the basis of his appearance (well over 6 foot, well built, big beard, low voice that only someone with an Adam's apple and whose balls have dropped could have). Imagine my relief to find that I have not been misgendering him for over a decade because he has helpfully added his pronouns to his email auto signature - they are he/him/his. There is no company diktat to add pronouns on emails so clearly this is important to Paul or maybe he has been misgendered recently.

So, I thought I would ensure that Paul was not offended on a Teams meeting this afternoon and kicked off the meeting by asking everyone to note that Paul's pronouns are he/him/his and that given that he has stated these that everyone please be sensitive to ensuring that they use them. No one said anything so I think they all took it on board, no one misgendered Paul and I like to think that his move to include his pronouns at work has been embraced in my meeting. Maybe as a result others that attended the meeting will add theirs to their auto signatures too.

If ths is really 'one of the nastiest threads on mumsnet' I expect it will be reported and vanish in a puff of smoke shortly. Adios, mes amigos, fare thee well, such sweet sorrow, etc ...

It’s always interesting to see what activates a collective dummy throw

Any sort of gentle mockery, generally. We must take this ideology seriously at all times.

And a thread about enjoying watching flies die. That is a very nasty thread. Why is it it’s only threads where people are calling out this g word that I’m not allowed to say that are labelled nasty or mean? Almost like people with an agenda are trying to stop people discussing this topic

I’ll miss you. It’s been fun. We had a good run didnt we?

employees without trans identities matter too. Some of them also have mental health issues that could be exacerbated by the behaviour of colleagues and superiors at work.

Quite.

It proves in fact that the supposed noble values are nothing more than a veneer, there is no genuine care or committment to them as values. They're merely a way to manipulate people into compliance with creating in fact two groups of people: the special ones who make demands and get service, and the herd who must serve them and be afraid of putting a foot wrong in the process.

How on earth anyone can be dim enough not to see the very obvious immediate problems ahead with this baffles me.

But you were mocking him. You know it, and he knows it.
The fact that you were sly and underhand about it doesn't make it any better.

You sound like a blue-haired wokie with no sense of humour.

Get a grip FFS, she was only having a joke with him.

How is it funny and clever? What’s funny about it? It’s not very clever either - it makes little difference in the grand scheme of things and didn’t take a huge amount of brainpower to think up. People are falling over themselves to pretend it was really witty and intelligent - and I get it because if someone has similar views to you then of course you want to think they’re great for standing up for those views. But it really wasn’t clever or funny. There was nothing funny about it.

And as for ‘it’s just a joke/lighten up/no sense of humour’ isn’t that just what bullies say when they’re laughing at you and you dislike it? It’s not ‘a joke’ when the person you’re laughing at doesn’t find it funny. It’s just you laughing at being nasty to someone.

You seem very very determined to paint OP as an evil bully @Kanaloa is it because she will not accept the new religion?

Why is telling people the pronouns someone very freely put in his email signature bullying? If he didn’t want people to use them he should not have put them in should he? If he ours them in his email signature he can’t be upset if people use them can he?

No - I’ve explained I also disagree with the trans movement and think pronouns in emails are silly, and pronoun announcements in real life are a waste of everyone’s time.

But I’m not one of those people who will fanatically applaud anyone’s actions just because they agree with me on one topic. I simply said in a measured way that I thought op behaved unprofessionally. I also didn’t think it was ‘so funny and clever.’ There really wasn’t anything funny about it, was there? And I don’t think the best way to argue your point on the trans issues is to single someone out in a meeting you’re running then gleefully skip to mumsnet to have everyone fawn over you and nominate a fairly dull story for classics as if it was hilarious.

Although plenty of people have thrown insults and sneering comments - no sense of humour/dreary/blue haired ‘wokie’ etc. Just because someone disagrees that op is a hilarious clever little darling doesn’t mean they’re part of or agree with the current trans movement. I don’t. And whenever it comes up I share my opinion with others about how damaging it is to women’s and girls’ rights. But I do it respectfully and in an adult fashion - not by sneering at my colleagues then trying to get others to tell me I’m oh so clever.

Repent motherfuckers.

Having said that, humour is so subjective. So if you were all genuinely giggling away and thinking ‘wow this woman is so so clever, how did she ever think of that clever and hilarious idea’ then I’m glad you enjoyed it. It just isn’t for me. And personally I don’t think anyone’s going to come round to the right way of thinking when this is the attitude that goes with it.

Do we have to do a Cersei walk of Shame or is just 30 Hail Marys enough?

Why do you think a trans ally would be embarrassed about his pronouns being mentioned in a meeting, exactly? It seems like a strange assumption to me, thinking that pro-trans people would be upset by people mentioning their self-expressed pronouns, and I'm really not sure why people are so enraged about it, or at other people here for daring to find it mildly amusing.

So would you prefer is to issue ease and death threats and get people fired like the TRA do? Which is better, gentle mockery or nasty abuse? I mean, one of the bekind lot sent JKR a bomb threat. Is what the OP did worse than that?

Sorry that was abuse and rape threats

For me the choice isn’t between mocking your colleagues and boasting about it or death threats. I do think there’s a measured in between where you can meet with firm
and respectful debate and protest. No aggression, no passive agressive actions. However, I can see we’re simply not going to agree. You think anyone who isn’t fawning in agreement is an enemy - I’m really not. The trans movement is the opposite of what I stand for. However, that doesn’t mean I think anyone who also disagrees with the trans movement is automatically right in all their behaviours.

So you’ll be telling the TRA that their abuse of women is not acceptable, or is it just women you wish to chastise? Women tried the ‘measured in between’. Some of us are still recovering from the abuse we got. Some people lost their jobs.

. I do not fawn over anyone and I totally respect anyone’s right to disagree with whatever they wish. I would not have done what the OP did, however much I find it funny. It is the hyperbole and hypocrisy that annoys me. We are all just supposed to go along with the pronoun nonsense while nicely asking if we can have our rights back. All these people calling the OP out for ‘bullying’ when it is people who do not subscribe to this ideology that are getting bullied. It feels a lot like DARVO to me

I don't see any reason to get angry and insult people about a story you don't see the funny side of. You do you. This is a broad movement, women are always held to a higher standard than anyone else and never allowed to indulge in even gentle mockery of this patent nonsense which is destroying women's rights. We're expected to be saints while other people can be vile to us and people justify it. No. If you don't approve of the OP, you don't have to join in. But give over with the lectures and tone policing.

Of course I think it’s unacceptable. I don’t know how I could tell ‘the TRA’ as a whole but I give my opinions that it’s unacceptable (both on here and in real life).

Just because someone disagrees that this behaviour was hilarious and totally amazing doesn’t mean they’re in agreement with the TRA.

As I said we’re simply not going to agree. I think it wasn’t funny, you don’t seem to be able to see my side, so I don’t think any proper debate is really possible. I’ve said what I think, but you seem to think there’s only people trampling all over women/sending death threats and people ‘hilariously’ mocking random staff at their work who have joined in the stupidity. I think there’s shades of grey in the world. I agree the pronouns are silly, I don’t think mocking one person publicly at work (and saying you don’t have a sense of humour if you don’t find it funny) is the way to challenge the trans movement.

Hope his toes rightly curled! 😂

So what is then.? If mockery does not work, asking nicely does not work, gentle criticism does not work, straight saying no does not work, what do you suggest? Descending to the levels of the TRA?

Just because someone disagrees that this behaviour was hilarious and totally amazing

Why all the exaggeration and sneering at what people think is amusing? It's unnecessary. You don't find it funny. Other people do. People watch Dave Chapelle and Ricky Gervais, some of them find it funny, some don't. There are AIBU threads where people have recounted indulging in much worse behaviour in the workplace, with many people egging them on. I fail to see why an anonymous poster talking about mentioning someone's self expressed pronouns in a meeting is completely beyond the pale.

Personally I think these people being encouraged to take themselves less seriously would do everyone a lot of good.

Well, I thought the OP did a good thing