Sex Education safeguarding horrors reported in the Times today (SSA quoted)

[2fallsfromSSA]

This is mostly about Sex Education but there is so much crossover with teaching about gender.

Links:

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/35cd493a-fee1-11ec-88db-ae1b6b9bdd3e?shareToken=5727832e05f12b11a3f5f013a0a493ac

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10996893/Children-told-prostitution-rewarding-job-sex-education-providers-promote-kinks.html?fbclid=IwAR0KCS_n_-9Jr_NXsURgRz6qPbdtGktT0Wfw_O3C3kpgZeXHl5FL5WsokB4

twitter.com/SafeSchools_UK/status/1545665347730145280?s=20&t=A7LxK6jkwjG9AECtpMXC0A

Lots of examples from BISH which is run by Justin Hancock, includes material on kinks and fetishes ("n a post about “kink”, Bish links to a blog that provides a list of sexual activities including using manacles and irons, whips, swinging and beating) advice to a 14 year old having sex with her boyfriend that "she probably won't get pregnant using the withdrawal method". He failed to mention the relationship was illegal and also suggested lots of lube for anal sex.

Justin charges schools between £500-£600 a day to deliver this so called sex education.

Other examples covered in the story include materials from the Proud Trust advising parents to make play doh models with their children to demonstrate masturbation.

There needs to be a serious overhaul and careful regulation of Sex Education.

Agreed - it's interesting how many men have self identified as "experts" on talking to other people's children about sex. And that includes the numerous male born trans individuals / groups who have been doing the rounds in schools and universities for years sharing the details of their "transition".

We need to start seeing these "performances" for what they are - and it's not education.

Absolutely.

Sadly, the co opting of LGB to include the T and, particularly, the undefinable- bar-all-about-kink-Queer has been a disaster for education. Because education has recently "realised" how important relationship education is* unfortunately all the sexed up charities have latched onto it like vampires.

They know there's no guidance for how to teach the curriculum or write the lesson content so they happily filled the gap.

(labour's updated curriculum that launched just before the tories got in was v holistic, focussed on child development, mental health and relationships and based on a lot of research but no one remembers that. I have an old photo copied copy. I couldn't even find it archived the last time I looked.)

It's all v much appreciated here and on the chalk face ❤️

@FrancescaContini I agree, it is a male responsibility to stop rape. Until that goal is achieved, girls need to be forewarned on how predators operate, to keep themselves safe. I just want to protect women and girls. I think it's ok to have that conversation. This could be covered in consent classes for boys and girls, so both understand what is happening. Rape is caused by males, but the females suffer, that's the reality.

But many predators operate by befriending and gaining trust. Exhibiting predatory behaviour that goes unrecognised and unnoticed before it even gets to the point of rape.

Something adults are clearly failing at on a daily basis given the subject of this thread.

The adults around these children need to do their jobs. We can't place this responsibility onto children when the adults themselves can't do it. Or shout bigot/man hater/hysterical whenever behaviour is called out.

Yes, children and parents need to learn how predators behave. It should of course be age appropriate and with the onus on adults doing the protecting. It is something that needs to be talked about openly.

Predators will usually try to break smaller barriers through grooming. Like a hand on the shoulder, buying heart shaped chocolates etc. They operate in plain sight. If parents could know about these tactics, they have a better chance of seeing them off.

When l grew up, people didn't talk about predators at all. It was perceived as something that happened elsewhere to other people. Now we know it's in every strata of society. Preditors will go to great lengths, and we need a defence.

I can’t find the thread now, but the NSPCC I believe also subtly changed their definition of abuse in a way that means a child who has been groomed will not recognise what they are experiencing as abuse.

What worries me the most is the plausibility of the ‘be kind’ message purportedly underpinning the creep / normalisation of kink and violent and degrading sexual acts into SRE. My DD attended a uni open day where the hosting prof asked them all to follow her project on Twitter. It was about the creation of an LGBTQIA+ toolkit for use with younger children. The aim was to get the message right down to reception age children so that from the earliest age there is nothing to be ashamed of.

I have seen this same message linking ‘transphobia’ to Section 28, with people, particularly teachers, saying about LGBT books for young people ‘I wish I could have seen people like me in books when I was younger. It would have saved me from years of self-loathing and anxiety’.

Representation of LGB children, adults and families is great and necessary and it is wonderful that we have moved on from those dark days. The addition of T though has changed everything, allowing regressive stereotypes to return on steroids, peddling lies to children when they are at their most vulnerable in terms of grappling with the big identity and belonging questions, and giving a platform to ‘brave and stunning’ individuals, many of whom are deeply troubled and for whom normal safeguarding boundaries are somehow not seen as pertinent (eg the questionable. NSPCC ambassador appointment).

Cuckooing T into this minefield of a confused muddle of mandatory RSE, the practical need to educate about pregnancy and STIs, consent and sexual orientation tipped a lot of education professionals out of their comfort zone. As a result, more teachers than ever before have looked to external schemes of work (many of them endorsed by local authorities) and assumed they fit the bill. The vacuum appears to have been disproportionately filled by experts from the ‘sex positive’ side, where nothing is shameful. Unfortunately for girls, that means a whole generation of boys have been told about / seen practices that utterly demean girls and pay no attention to their pleasure. And a whole generation of girls have been taught to expect boys to expect anal sex, to choke them, hurt them.

Whoever ends up in charge of education after the current shitshow is over needs to get this sorted and fulfil the manifesto pledge about properly limiting children’s access to porn and get the online harms bill through.

@partystress It's got so complex now. I think we really need to simplify and focus on child protection.

This is such an important conversation.

The addition of T though has changed everything, allowing regressive stereotypes to return on steroids, peddling lies to children when they are at their most vulnerable in terms of grappling with the big identity and belonging questions, and giving a platform to ‘brave and stunning’ individuals, many of whom are deeply troubled and for whom normal safeguarding boundaries are somehow not seen as pertinent (eg the questionable. NSPCC ambassador appointment).

My red flag moment was when I realised how much influence this person took (or was given) despite their involvement with some of the most extreme violent and degrading porn that women are subjected to:
www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/3374614-John-Ozimek-now-Jane-Fae-on-women-feminists-and-victims-of-pornographers

Knowing that they claimed to have influenced the Girl Guides into removing safeguarding and that countless media outlets gave them a platform to promote their beliefs made me realise just how dangerous to children this ideology is. That Mumsnet thread was from 2018 - and look at where we are now...

Thank you @MrsOvertonsWindow , I had completely forgotten about that individual.

Chilling when you look at the extent of institutional capture.

WarriorN - Yesterday 23:25

Sorry to derail the main discussion but I just looked up the case you mentioned last night (of someone rushed through genital surgery without due counselling) apropos it having taken place in an area that is usually more sensible.

I was very shocked to read that the clinic that carried out the surgery said, openly, and apparently without any sense of it being a failing on their part, that it “Does not provide mental health services to clients.”
That is so shocking. This says it all.
I can see that they may assumed adequate counselling would have taken place before the surgery referral (it had not); but surely you don’t carry out castration etc before taking extra checks? This lack of joined up services is not ‘care’ at all and has had tragic consequences.

’The first question you get asked there is, “Do you want genital surgery?” ’ he says. ‘I wasn’t sure. But I’d heard you could get therapy if you were on the waiting list for surgery, so I said yes.’

The clinic – which will not comment on Ritchie’s specific case – told the MoS it does not provide mental health services to patients.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10953157/Man-suing-NHS-trans-surgery-regrets-bravely-waived-anonymity-share-ordeal.html

For someone with those "niche" interests to permitted to weigh in on matters relating to child safeguarding still feels unbelievable. I suspect it would be to most people but having successfully muzzled the press to prevent them openly reporting facts in relation to the trans agenda, presumably people (except for the Girl Guides) just aren't aware.

@2fallsfromSSA · Today 09:06
Thank you very much for your message, and for all you are doing.

partystress · Today 11:20
I won’t quote your whole thread as it was quite long, but I agree with all you say.

I would like to add that I also hate the pushing of young children into being randomly sexual in the purely physical sense, long before they’ve gradually and naturally reached and gone through puberty and begin to form respectful and loving relationships of various kinds with others in which more than the body is involved. That early separation of the body from the mind can make for a sort of detachment leading to an unfulfilled emotional desert in my view.

Scrolling I was really shocked too.
I thought he was in the us when he first started tweeting.

Wow this is horrific. What are we normalising?

I agree 😥

There is a parliament petition about removing gender ideology from RSE see:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/petitions_noticeboard/4585082-rse-content-on-gender-vs-sex. Res gender vs sex

I’m very glad to hear this. As the saying goes:

The best revenge is a life well lived.

I hope you have a lovely peaceful life now 🌷

I want to sign and forward this petition but it’s disappeared…

It's still there, under Petitions and Activism, under the Classified(?) section of All Talks. I don't know why the above link isn't working. I'll try posting it again:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/petitions_noticeboard/4585082-rse-content-on-gender-vs-sex