I’ve joined Stonewall’s last (?) stronghold. 😫

[OnceAgainWithFeeling]

Changed jobs earlier this year. I’m in HR. Have had several run ins with the EDI lead about not collecting any data on sex to inform eg need for menopause support and it being the actual protected characteristic. She agreed. Or so I thought.

New boss started a couple of months back and today I’ve been subjected to pronouns at the start of every meeting, talk of the Women’s network, menopause, misogyny and everyday sexism but then also Stonewall, pride network, the gender identity policy being developed.

I feel like it’s closing in on me. An interview candidate led with an example of someone complaining about pronouns on badges - they did not wish to have them (nor do I) but instead of making that an option, an additional pop up box was developed to “educate dissenters”. I left the NHS to come here, which has distanced itself from SW. I felt so positive about the role, which is demanding enough as it is.

I’ve updated my CV today. :(

to “educate dissenters”.

Holy moly!

I'm sorry, OP, what a hellish situation. Has the NHS distanced itself from Stonewall?!

All my local Trusts have left SW.

Had a humongous argument with my DH a few weeks back about the whole thing - he called me prejudiced and a bigot and said it’s something he will never ever discuss with me again. We have a daughter, FFS.

Genuinely feel like everyone around me has gone insane. My sister even tried to make excuses about DQSH and that monkey dildo show the other week. 😫

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10160975/Department-Health-latest-public-body-DITCH-Stonewall.html

This sounds awful. The silver lining is that they can no longer sack you for telling them your thoughts.

I won’t want to work there soon enough. :(

But where else is there that’s safe from this utter madness?

Join us in financial services. I’m trying to imagine a situation in any of the organisations I interact with where a colleague or client tried to announce their pronouns, or wanted to discuss their gender identity, or explain that sometimes they felt like a man and sometimes like a woman and we all had to use our intuition to work out how to respond to them on a given day, and was met with anything other than a quizzical look and a “well, moving on” sort of bemusement.

I left financial services for the NHS. Old boss is completely on the GI bandwagon. :-/

Reinsurance and runoff seems to have remained remarkably untainted, thank goodness.

@ComtesseDeSpair a “well, moving on” sort of bemusement. 😏

Due to an imminent restructure at work it looks like I am going to be moved into EDI and I am dreading it for exactly these reasons.

Plenty sectors/industries mostly unaffected by these issues, OP. Although I suppose if you're working with EDI people you're more likely to be up against it.

Thanks re the DOH article, AnyFucker - it doesnt' seem to have filtered through yet?

Also, I'm sorry about your DH. That's rough.

Credit Suisse comes to mind.

NB: other financial service companies do not seem to be an improvement in this regard.

Re: the DoH, this is very removed from NHS Trusts. SW is firmly embedded at every level of many areas in the NHS. Look at the recent responses from NHS personnel to the EHRC guidance: so many seniors declared that they intended to disregard it. afaik, Dr Michael Brady has faced no consequences for the claims around the review of the single sex wards.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4506395-Fears-over-flawed-NHS-single-sex-wards-review-carried-out-by-trans-advocate

I'm in Financial services. Totally signed up to Stonewall. In pride week last year they conducted an interview with some senior Gay and Lesbian professionals and they asked the question about whether there was a conflict between Lesbian/womens rights and Trans right- response was that this was totally fake- all lesbians were totally pro trans right/no exclusion etc etc. we have pronouns (not compulsory) questions about our gender stored with data about sex/disability etc - no reeducation of dissenters.
the only "good" thing is that the D&i agenda doesn't really impact anyone- its all lip service - which is generally bad but...

I work in HR too, I'd just leave if I were you, you can try fighting from the inside but risk damaging your career if you're too vocal. I turned down a job last year for this very reason 💐

A colleague mentioned that someone had left over “the pronoun thing” to the new Director. Response was basically “good riddance”. 😬

I fear stonewall is still stonewalling the NHS but under another guise. Hospitals are awash with rainbow paraphernalia as they compete for rainbow badge accreditation.

it’s creeping in, I’m seeing more ‘my pronouns are’ on email signatures by the day.

i was asked to put mine on, my answer was I didn’t care what someone referred to me in my absence. Our resident french speaker then went into a feminine/masculine rant. Does the pizza mind that it’s male? Does the croissant care that it’s female? (I may have got those mixed up). Our wider team tellingly haven’t put any on - possibly because they’ve been given ‘permission’ by our exchange which was in an open meeting. I wanted to get to ‘adult human female’ but the french language dominated the remaining time!

What a shame, it is probably easiest to move jobs.

The cynic in me thinks that some NHS managers are motivated to promote this stuff because mixed wards are generally easier to manage than maintaining separate sex ones.

If you haven't been there too long OP I would try to move on and explain away the time on your CV.

If you were to stay I would look into joining a Union or paying to be a member of the Free Speech Union (not perfect but I hear they are very helpful), check your house insurance for cover on employment issues and I would look to join a grassroots group that is relevant. For example there are sensible, not gender woo, groups for midwifery and teaching. If an HR one hasn't been created yet then there will be one soon I expect. I once thought the NHS wouldn't buy into this but I've realised that as a public-facing service it was probably an easy target and I understand so much more about institutional capture now.

There is good advice to counter this if challenged as you may find it difficult to keep your head down. Sex Matters and Legal Feminist are good resources I find. Also search here for 'pronouns' and you'll find more.

Due to your DH and sister buying into all this I hope you have some local groups like the Women's Rights Network or Standing for Women locals for support. It's really important so to stay sane, I hope you find your way with family and with the job. You're not alone.

Thank you.

Just to be clear, I’m not in the NHS anymore. My current employer doesn’t recognise trade unions.

it’s a huge job and at times I feel I’ve sold my soul (there’s a lot of travel and late night/weekend meetings), but Im getting so much positive feedback about what I’m getting done that I’d be sad to have to leave over this agenda. :(

Ffs. Why can’t a hospital just be a hospital?? Why does it need to waste staff time competing for a badge like some bizarre adult sex-obsessed version of Blue Peter?

I’m keeping that last line to use at a suitable occasion!

Me too OP.

Meanwhile here is a brief conversation from a recent visitor to the hospital:

"Lady topping up the masks,l pointed out how the ones they have squash your face, she said they had forgot to order, l said if they had ones with rainbows on they wouldn't have forgotten to order she said they'd have millions"

Looks like I'm not the only member of staff to be fed up with it.

Gosh I feel better for being as upset by this TWAW being pushed into the progressive movement by progressive leaders I used to follow.
I don't trust the judgment of one host since he said angrily he can't understand why anyone would freak out over a transwomen in women's sports. He's very educated and I'm sure he knows the arguments on both sides but only chose to voice one side.
I also quit trusting AOC as much after finding out she was such a strong advocate of TWAW. It shows either really bad judgment or dishonesty.