Ok so I’m really fucking angry. How do I direct this so I’m not just screaming into a void.

[Ostryga]

I’ve always been GC on the ‘down low’ because you know - we’re all horrid creatures that want vengeance. Or something.

I cannot fucking stand this any longer. I’m reading everything and honestly I want to just burn men to the ground.

Obviously I have to direct this into something less annihilating and more all encompassing. But Jesus Christ. Where do I even start?

Eh?? Literally no idea why that was deleted. There was absolutely nothing inflammatory in that post.

How do i get clarification on why a post has been deleted?

@BenCooperisaGod if you report the post yourself, you can ask for a clarification as to why it was deleted

@Waitwhat23

What on earth was wrong with BenCooperisaGod's comment? Didn't seem rude/personal/outrageous to me

I was wondering that…id ask MNHQ

So apparently i used a banned phrase, that has the initials of a common male name (think henman). But i don't think i did. Am i going mad?

@VenezuelaChant

Join local GC/radfem groups. Write to your MP/MSP. Donate to crowdfunders. Subscribe to GC newsletters and make noise about current campaigns. Speak to friends. Warn the women in your life who are unaware this is happening. Encourage the men in your life to notice and call out sexism, because this is a movement deeply rooted in sexist poison, and men are still more willing to listen to men than women. Drop things low-key into conversation. Get involved as safely as you are able. Draw courage and strength and wisdom from the many, many women who are in this fight together alongside you. Realise that this is sisterhood.

How do you find local groups? In a big city so I am sure there are plenty. I am not on FB. Contact one of the GC lobby groups?

Op I feel you, sometimes it just makes you despair. But like pps, generally I feel heartened that public debate is becoming more possible, and in personal life I’ve been braver and had positive responses, which helps.

I couldn't say for definite but it certainly didn't jump out at me (and it normally would because I know that the misogynistic monitors really don't like that phrase being used). Interesting how quick the deletion was given the posts I have seen asking for cis not to be used which are entirely ignored though.

So a bit of clarity. I was referring to children when i used the banned terminology. I did this as legally children cannot transition in any physical sense, so thought it might be different to the adult setting, particularly as in the example i gave which involved the potential of mixed sex sleeping arrangements for teenagers.

In my view the need for crystal clear language when safeguarding is concerned should over rule any sensitivities about identity. I suspect that a large portion of the unsuspecting public would think a transgirl is a female child. This is why our language is policed so heavily.

But at least now i know.

I’m none the wiser as to why MNHQ want to impose a ban on those three initials, (or the phrase written out in full).

It’s a much more accurate description than the one we’re forced to use on this site and I’ve seen many MANY more instances of “unkind” language directed toward those that recognise reality who are GC.

@BenCooperisaGod

So apparently i used a banned phrase, that has the initials of a common male name (think henman). But i don't think i did. Am i going mad?

I don’t remember seeing it, and I’m sure if i did id remember

Ask them to show you your post

Not in a snotty way but in an honest how did I manage that way…at least it will put your mind at rest

They did show me the post and i did use an approximation of the banned phrase. The reason i suspect it didn't jump out was because i used it in the context of children and the intent was clearly about clarity of language rather than as an intended 'insult'.

Also appears this is a blanket ban, so phrase cannot be used to refer to a specific person OR in the abstract.

I am thinking when clarity of sex is paramount the option now is to say transgirl (i.e. male child). I don't really see how this is any more respectful, but hey ho.

I take breaks and try to look at different views but the anger does come in waves.

I'm m holding on quite hard at the moment to male and female, because the tide of activism long ago started trying to take them over (eg a paper on transgender experiences in sport that used 'transgender females' to mean male people and 'transgender males' to mean females). I got a polite PM here from someone asking me to stop referring to transmen as female or females. It was a PM with lots of smiley emoticons and asking me to make 'small changes'. For sure, eliminating the ability to refer to women as a sex class is TINY. I responded angrily but I hope politely.

There is hope. There is a HUGE pushback going on in one political party right now. There has to be, because the inability to name a problem cannot stand. Betty Friedan wrote 70 years ago about 'the problem that has no name'. We ave to be able to name ourselves.

Write to bloody boris Via the website
If everyone does this they filthy tories know it’s important.
I’m happy that everyone gets to live how they want BUT we need the conflicting requirements of women with a penis and women with a vagina openly talked about.

As any fule know I don’t agree with the terminology above just can’t be arsed to dance about.

I am looking forward to using it when I talk to dcs school about this. They are hiding behind language.

Join the women's rights network on Twitter and find local people

@BenCooperisaGod

They did show me the post and i did use an approximation of the banned phrase. The reason i suspect it didn't jump out was because i used it in the context of children and the intent was clearly about clarity of language rather than as an intended 'insult'.

Also appears this is a blanket ban, so phrase cannot be used to refer to a specific person OR in the abstract.

I am thinking when clarity of sex is paramount the option now is to say transgirl (i.e. male child). I don't really see how this is any more respectful, but hey ho.

Oh gotcha

So it was the two first words that caused the issue

I always think thats a bit silly, the word identifies/identify is thrown around with wild abandon without any issues on here…usually

And youve got to respect everyone’s identity until you use the actual word

Also stop thinking that it’s about explaining and that people will see the light.

Most of the pro trans posters on here clearly don’t care about the threat to women and children of twaw. If a man identifies as a woman, to them, that should trump any other concern. Forget hospital rapes and damaged de transitioners, they are collateral damage, ‘friendly fire’.

Therefore action is all that matters. Writing to mps, Boris, the school, your work.
Follow mn on it’s online safety work.
Donate to crowdfunders.
Delete twitter.

Today a male friend has posted on FB about the US swimming situation. He isn’t getting any abuse at all people are agreeing with him. I wouldn’t dream of putting it on my FB however.

Why on earth is Mr Henman a banned phrase? It's the most accurate description, surely?

Because trans activists decided it was "hate speech" and put pressure on MN.

www.theguardian.com/media/2018/jun/13/mumsnet-transgender-row-feminism-tougher-forum-rules

On the point of seeking out relevant groups to join and interact with, can I ask if anyone knows relevant situation in Ireland (where I now live, although am English)? Who would the relevant GC feminist groups be here, does anyone know? Self id has been here since 2015, who is kicking back?

www.womensrights.network/

Contact these women. They have groups across the country and have regular campaigns you can get involved in. Channelling the anger into actions really helps.

[quote Ereshkigalangcleg]www.theguardian.com/media/2018/jun/13/mumsnet-transgender-row-feminism-tougher-forum-rules[/quote]
Oh, wow, I hadn't realised, thank you

@theDudesmummy

On the point of seeking out relevant groups to join and interact with, can I ask if anyone knows relevant situation in Ireland (where I now live, although am English)? Who would the relevant GC feminist groups be here, does anyone know? Self id has been here since 2015, who is kicking back?

For Ireland try thecountess.ie/