Should I tell a potential employee I am pregnant?

[Twiggles36]

I had an interview today with a start-up in another European country. I would be working with them as a freelancer, remotely. They are quite a small company and are looking for someone who can guarantee about 15-18 hours per week. As I'd be a freelance collaborator and not an employee, I'm quite sure I wouldn't be given formal maternity leave/pay, I would just not accept any projects for a few weeks when I have the baby. In the interview I did not mention I was pregnant, as I didn't want to hinder my chances, but I also feel a bit deceitful accepting an offer when I know I wouldn't be available for a month or so after my baby is born in the summer, and this could create serious problems for them as I am offering a very specialist service and it wouldn't be easy for them to find someone to fill in for me while I'm away. If they make me an offer, should I tell them I am pregnant and won't be working for a month or so after the baby's born?

(Baby's due at the end of June)

Absolutely not yet. You’re freelance.

Freelancers don’t get mat pay from the companies they work for - it’s a contract for service not an employment contract.

I wouldn’t. I’d just act like it was new news and tell them how you’ll accommodate it when you start.
Yes it’s rubbish for them, but you not working Is rubbish for you and your baby.

That said they may feel it’s a bit rude and it may damage your relationship with them. But you’re taking a risk in telling them first, ime they won’t hire you

For a small business with you doing something hard to replace it would be kind but you don't have to.

Is this your first baby? What makes you think you'll be in aposition to work after just a few weeks?

Provided you can deliver what they need when they need it overall, it shouldn’t be an issue, should it?

Perhaps I could tell them, but only once they've given me an offer? That way they can't withdraw the offer without it being blatant discrimination. If I tell them when they're still considering candidates they could not accept me but make up another reason

@WouldIBeATwat

Provided you can deliver what they need when they need it overall, it shouldn’t be an issue, should it?

The thing is, it will be an ongoing collaboration, more or less permanent. So when I'm not working for them, the work just won't get done for a few months.

@JustWonderingIfYou

For a small business with you doing something hard to replace it would be kind but you don't have to.

Is this your first baby? What makes you think you'll be in aposition to work after just a few weeks?

It is my first baby, yes. I'm not sure, maybe it won't be feasible. I was thinking to tell them I won't be able to work for maybe 2 months after the birth, does that sound realistic? It is a role in which I can manage my time as I like, as long as I get the projects that need doing done each week. The thing is, my freelance work has been so sporadic and unstable for the past few years, and this might be a really good thing to have going forward.

I think I disagree with the others. It would be a different calculation if you were an employee, but if I was contracting with a service for something, I would like to know well in advance that they would not be available for a certain period. It really wouldn't matter why - I would only need to know that there would be no availability from x to y.

@Twiggles36

Perhaps I could tell them, but only once they've given me an offer? That way they can't withdraw the offer without it being blatant discrimination. If I tell them when they're still considering candidates they could not accept me but make up another reason

Freelance is not employment. Different rules.

TBH, going back to work varies hugely. Some people manage to do it quite soon after, depends on birth and how you feel/recover. Personally I'd say 6/9 months is more realistic and fairer on both you and the baby.

It can be difficult sometimes to know how long you will be off with a first baby. But your work also sounds reasonably flexible. Do you have someone who can be helpful with childcare?

FWIW I worked from home and with my fourth baby only took two weeks off, but I might give a little more time for a first baby. If you had a section it might take you that long just to be able to get around like normal.

Are you sure this is a freelance role? Talk of permanency implies not?

I also think you grossly under-estimate the impact of a 2 month old baby on your time.

@WouldIBeATwat

Are you sure this is a freelance role? Talk of permanency implies not?

Yes, I am a sole trader and they are a company, so they would be outsourcing work to me. It's just that it would be on the understanding that I can provide a certain amount of work each week. If I can't, I would be within my rights to just not accept projects for a while, but they are interviewing people on the understanding that this would be an ongoing collaboration.

@MangyInseam

It can be difficult sometimes to know how long you will be off with a first baby. But your work also sounds reasonably flexible. Do you have someone who can be helpful with childcare?

FWIW I worked from home and with my fourth baby only took two weeks off, but I might give a little more time for a first baby. If you had a section it might take you that long just to be able to get around like normal.

Not really - my parents are far away and DH works full time as an employee, so his hours aren't flexible or part-time like mine.

@WouldIBeATwat

Freelancers don’t get mat pay from the companies they work for - it’s a contract for service not an employment contract.

Yep I know, that's why I said I'm sure I wouldn't get this (I know it's obvious but so many of my friends are like "when are you going on maternity leave" or "how long do get for mat leave") so I always just presume people don't understand how it works for freelancers haha

*as in get mat leave

It depends entirely on your baby whether you'd be able to work from home with no childcare. I have a 4 month old and sometimes struggle to put a wash on throughout the day! Also I'd feel very guilty trying to distract her whilst I worked behind a screen so be prepared that it might not work out.

@rolopo

It depends entirely on your baby whether you'd be able to work from home with no childcare. I have a 4 month old and sometimes struggle to put a wash on throughout the day! Also I'd feel very guilty trying to distract her whilst I worked behind a screen so be prepared that it might not work out.

Yes, it is difficult because I really don't want my baby to be emotionally neglected and up to now in the pregnancy I always envisioned having loads of time to spend with them during the day - walks, reading books, groups, playing together... because recently my work has been so slow and sometimes I don't get projects for weeks at a time. However, an opportunity like this would, on one hand, be ideal - I've been hoping for more consistent work for about 3 years, something to "set me up for life" so I'm not constantly looking for new clients or going weeks with no work and suddenly being inundated. So it would be a very good long-term opportunity, but maybe not very nice for the baby in the short-term :(

If it really doesn't matter when you do your 15 to 18 hours, and you could do them mostly during the weekend when your DH is available to care for the baby, then it's potentially doable. Would be a bit miserable though, until your baby is old enough and you are able to put them into childcare for that time during the week. So perhaps 2 to 3 full days in nursery or with a childminder? Were you planning on using paid childcare at some point?

Freelance is not employment. Different rules.

Sorry, I don't mean discrimination in a formal sense. I know they'd be within their rights to withdraw the offer upon discovering I'm pregnant, but I think they would be much more hesitant do so as it would be really obvious why they are doing it.

@RoseslnTheHospital

If it really doesn't matter when you do your 15 to 18 hours, and you could do them mostly during the weekend when your DH is available to care for the baby, then it's potentially doable. Would be a bit miserable though, until your baby is old enough and you are able to put them into childcare for that time during the week. So perhaps 2 to 3 full days in nursery or with a childminder? Were you planning on using paid childcare at some point?

Yeah, that is an idea, although I think it would be quite nice to have family time, with the 3 of us together, at the weekends... I didn't want to put them in childcare until they're about 2 or 3, but maybe it would be better for them if they had 2/3 full days with a childminder, having lots of fun and attention, and the rest of the time with me, as opposed to always being with me but not really with me.

I feel you are being unreasonable on your baby. You need to give them what they need in the initial first years. It is a good mindset for both you and the father to be able to prioritise this little person.