How I became Gender Critical

[SapphosRock]

This is a great article and really reflects my experience. Especially the slow realisation that Stonewall and the rainbow flag no longer represented me. Can anyone else relate?

https://duncanhenry.substack.com/p/tra-to-gc

Thank you for posting.

“Hi I’m a TERF, do you want to talk?”

Well done that woman.

Unfortunately so many men, in particular gay man, who have absolutely no skin in the game whatsoever, who chant "be kind" to us with no consequences whatsoever for themselves, don't progress beyond "TWAW, no debate".

Many of them will have heard
'Hi I’m a TERF, do you want to talk?”
And blocked.

But... Well done that woman.

Very interesting article, thank you for sharing.

I had a sense from long back that something was wrong with using life-changing surgery to seek to resolve identity issues but it was the BBC documentary Transgender Kids: Who Knows Best? at the start of 2017 that made me realise I had to actively learn more and speak out:

www.dailymotion.com/video/x58s24i

That's a careful and precise read, step by step unpicking all irrational demands and inconsistent fake facts.
Well done Duncan Henry - and thank you.

From that article:

"One day in 2019 I noticed a thread on social media that a work colleague had started. It said only women born female can be women. An argument on Facebook ensued with my “side” and her “side” arguing over this point, as I tried to make her see that trans women are women, just as much as she was, and that they were the victims because they couldn’t help being born male. I was incensed at her bigotry. So after several days stewing over this I contacted my LGBT group, and our HR department.

I showed them the social media posts and asked “is this hate?”. I was aware of the hate that was covered up with concern — Stonewall had told me to beware of such a line of attack, and the trans group agreed. Yes this was hate and I should report her. Eventually I did, but even then something didn’t feel quite right. I had expected to feel “righteous” as she was told to take her post down or face consequences. She complied, I’d won and stopped hate. Hadn’t I?"

I was the work colleague he reported. I've still not forgiven him, though I'm pleased that he has revised his opinions.

I'd also like to clarify that I was not told to remove my social media post by HR. I chose to do so before they even contacted me, as I couldn't face an argument at that stage (I'd probably welcome it now!)

When I did finally have a discussion with HR they agreed that there was nothing hateful in my comments.

Wow FuriousAndFrustrated I can imagine you felt... furious and frustrated.

Shame he hasn't been in touch to apologise as he clearly realises he was in the wrong.

I was the work colleague he reported. I've still not forgiven him, though I'm pleased that he has revised his opinions.

Bloody hell. I can't imagine how I'd feel in those circumstances. Not happy is an understatement.

I have to say his essay is exciting to me. It articulates everything, but with a broader back story.

@FuriousAndFrustrated that time would have been maddening. I hope he apologises

As someone with a close family member who is a trans woman, who has banned JK Rowling in their house and grimaces at her name being mentioned, this was an interesting read in what is a very confusing time for my family.

Thank you for posting that extract FuriousAndFrustrated. I now know that I don't need to read any more from someone who in all seriousness
"tried to make her see that trans women are women, just as much as she was...". And that's without the last part of that sentence to cap it.
Too bad you had to endure the idiocy never mind the reporting and spite.

@Abitofalark keep reading, it's worth it I promise.

You can't promise that, Sapphos. On the other hand if you wrote of your own experience, that would be different.

My experience is very similar. I'm a lesbian and always felt Stonewall supported and represented me. When they added the T onto LGB I was all for it. Why wouldn't I want to be a good ally to another minority group?

I truly didn't see an issue in recognising trans women as women. The trans women I knew were committed to fully transitioning and I couldn't see what threats they would pose.

Then trans activists started terrorising women in my town, bullying and threatening them out of their jobs. (charity bosses, cafe owners, we all know what happened to Kathleen Stock)

Every lesbian group I was in was overtaken by trans activists. Diva magazine started publishing articles written by an AGP male 'lesbian' who wrote of feeling aroused wearing his older sister's used knickers.

Trans women started winning in female sports, claiming women's prizes, lesbians were transphobic for not taking trans women as partners. Stonewall abandoned lesbians.

The final straw was discovering all the women's refuges and centres in my area has been captured and overtaken by TRAs.

And here I am. Gender Critical.

Oh definitely. The risks of coming out as GC in the LGBT community are very high.

I used to think there was a way to be a feminist and a trans ally, and I used to think there was middle ground and compromise.

The TRAs have proved that is impossible and they are unwilling to concede anything at all. Women and lesbians are not permitted to have anything for themselves. We are not allowed to speak for ourselves or voice any opinions unless we are cheerleading trans rights.

Anyone who steps out of line or speaks up for women's rights is relentlessly bullied, harassed and threatened. Or simply cancelled.

I've been blocked from most lesbian groups now, the AGP males are still in them of course.

Thanks for posting Sapphos. We've seen similar accounts from other women, with all the same intimidation and taking over of lesbian groups. There's been a bit of a complicated history with women and Stonewall or its predecessor campaigners. I always felt that it was essentially a men's movement even when gay women decided to join it and even though they've had women in prominent positions. But the way it's turned out in the last five years has been disastrous for women.

He did apologise, via a mutual acquaintance. He couldn't apologise directly as I had blocked him everywhere. (And still have him blocked!)

We no longer work at the same organisation, so I don't have to come into contact with him . Mind you, we hadn't worked together for years even before this, and yet he still felt inclined to try to get me into trouble. I just can't understand the mentality of "you must agree with me or I'll try to get you sacked."

Duncan Henry says he realised the gaslighting of lesbians — demanding that they accept transwomen as sexual partners — is a form of ‘conversion therapy’.

I agree, but the trans lobby has twisted the meaning of ‘conversion therapy’ to include include counselling for young people who are convinced they are trans, and want drugs and/or surgery to affirm their identity. Counselling gives them a chance to think these life-changing interventions through first.

The government is currently considering extending the present restrictions on conversion therapy to limit what therapists can do to help people like Keira Bell avoid making a life-changing mistake.

If you want to give kids this chance, let the government know. The consultation is at
www.gov.uk/government/consultations/banning-conversion-therapy

Massive dick move to report you @FuriousAndFrustrated also further proof that Stonewall has turned the whole movement into a cult. People are so absolutely sure they are the good and the righteous, that this is tolerance and kindness, everyone else is hateful and need to be dealt with.

I remember Duncan on Twitter. He put up with a fair amount of abuse. I appreciated him coming from a different perspective and I have to say, this essay is possibly one that could change some of my friends rigid views. Voices from the LGB community are very insightful and important. Especially as most men were on the side of “be kind” before the penny dropped.

I agree that reporting you was a massive dick move FuriousAndFrustrated

However, I can also understand Duncan's righteous rage. A few years ago I got into a similar war of words with a high profile feminist on Twitter, I was convinced she was in the wrong and causing harm to poor, defenseless trans people.

I cringe about it really hard now. I doubt she remembers our exchange but if she does then I owe her a big apology.

I think Duncan has been brave to publicly admit he was so wrong and even if you can't forgive him then at least you can feel vindicated.

Thank you SapphosRock for your account of how your views shifted. I remember you on this board a while back when you were presenting the be kind argument, and it must have been difficult to hear what we were saying. But then you looked and learned and experienced what we were talking about. And came back on to tell us why you changed position,and I thank you for that, as a lesbian who is depressed by other lesbians who have not been able to reject the TRA ideology.

You are welcome catzwhiskas

I'm interested if anyone was GC right from the start? Or did everyone start out supporting trans rights until they clocked what it actually meant?

The risks of coming out as GC in the LGBT community are very high.

Oh my god my comment was deleted for pointing out the difficulties faced by LGB people who are GC.

ScraggyThang I appreciated him coming from a different perspective and I have to say, this essay is possibly one that could change some of my friends rigid views.

I agree.