I was browsing in a well-known bookshop a few days ago. A woman roughly my age - a member of staff - approached me and asked me if I had read a particular book that was on the table (perhaps it’s part of her job to find out what customers are currently reading?). We chatted for a few minutes - she was obviously really knowledgeable - and then she gestured towards a table with a big pile of the same book and said:
Have you read this one? It won the Women’s Prize for Fiction recently?
Me: No, and I am not interested in reading it - it was written by a man (NB: the shop isn’t very busy but I have raised my voice a little so others can hear). The prize should have gone to a female writer.
Her: (looks taken aback and obviously not sure what to say) says nothing
Me: (keeping voice slightly raised and enunciating very clearly) I mention: men in women’s spaces/toilets/changing rooms (gesturing at my DDs) and I don’t want my daughters to go into a public toilet to find a man in there just because he says he’s a man. Women and girls need privacy and to feel safe.
Her: saying nothing but listening intently
Me: I’ve read an excellent book recently - Irreversible Damage by Abigail Shrier (I then give her a couple of salient points from the book eg ten years ago, this ideology didn’t exist/social contagion/ Internet) Also mentioned how such stereotypes were being broken down when we were children but now they’ve risen their ugly heads again.
Got interrupted by my DC who needed money. Woman went off to the till. Just as we were about to leave, she came over to me and said:
What’s the name of the book again? I’ll look for it.
Went out and elder DD furious with me for having what she called a “feminist rant” in public and how I shouldn’t express my opinions. I set her straight, too.
It felt good 😌