DD wants a breast reduction.

[cinammonbuns]

Her breast are not too big for her body, they do not cause her back pain and she would not be able to get on on the NHS. She says she wants a reduction because she feels disgusted when she looks at how big her boobs are.

She is a 32EE and a size 8 top and bottom for reference. She is 18, 2nd year uni and has an internship this summer which would fully cover the cost of the procedure. She has said it’s been bothering her for years and has no issue of it causes her to be unable to breastfeed as she doesn’t want children.
I think she would like to go down to a B to C.
Is there any links or advice I can give her. I am happy for her to do it if she considers all the risks but I know the plastic surgery regret rate is quite high so I want to inform her of all the risks.

[MissLucyEyelesbarrow]

@AnnaMagnani

M&S?! Say no more.

They are absolutely shite and should be banned from bra measuring. They still add 4 inches on the back for starters.

Get a Boob or Bust measurement and the lovely ladies on Style and Beauty will have lots of recommendations on minimizing, 18 yr old appropriate bras of the right size.

Agree. If you are anywhere near London, go to Rigby & Peller. They are lovely and you don't have to buy anything. Getting the right size bra, not the size that M&S and John Lewis measurers told me to buy, was genuinely life-changing.

That said, as a 28/30E myself, I wouldn't stand in her way if she wants surgery. It's not just the size of the breasts, it's the proportions. Like me, she probably has a narrow back and shoulders, so the bloody things stick out a mile. I've come to terms with mine now, but they caused me so much self-consciousness, harassment and discomfort when I was younger. Why should the poor girl suffer for years, on the off-chance that she might want to breast-feed in the future? It's not as if she is giving up her chance to have children.

[cakedays]

@CovidSmart

The one thing that stopped me from having surgery was the risk of loosing sensation in the nipples.
Too important in my sex life.

Yes absolutely here too. I always had large breasts, though when I lost weight overall they reduced a lot, and following pregnancy are now something like 34G. But I have always had very sensitive nipples and (in my 40s) am not quite able to orgasm just from nipple stimulation but almost. So I have made my peace with how they look just for what they add in other ways!

I wanted a breast reduction as a teenager (and went about for years wearing those ghastly M&S "minimiser" bras), but the things that stopped me from pursuing one was first the breastfeeding angle (which did in fact bother me as a teenager); but especially the nipple sensation one. Losing nipple sensation would have been a big blow even at that age. That might be more something that might impact on your DD than the theoretical idea of breastfeeding?

As an aside I was actually very worried beforehand that breastfeeding would affect nipple sensation (was keen to breastfeed anyway). By god it was painful but I stuck it out for 18m. DD was like an industrial Hoover. After giving up bf I was so relieved to find that the nipple sensation wasn't affected by them having been practically chewed off by a baby six times a day for over a year

[dratalanta]

I'm a UK size 6/8 and making the change from 32E to 28G/GG was life-changing for me. With a proper bra, I feel in comfortable and in proportion, and I have the choice in clothes of whether to emphasise my bust or hide it. I also wear nightwear with soft bras built-in, so I can answer the door like that without feeling self-conscious. I'm now in my 40s and have never regretted not having surgery.

[AmazingGrapes]

I wore a size 8 at age 18 with DD breasts, at 29 (Pre kids) was size 8 with C cup and now (post kids) I am 34, size 10 and B cup.

Kids or no kids my body changed so much from teen years to 20s. How would she feel if she got a breast reduction and then ended up with an A cup in a few years? Or put on a small amount of weight and went up a dress size? Her body will change many times over the years probably and it’s much sustainable to learn to accept (and appreciate) your body than it is to continually change things you don’t like.

I was a non-confident late teen/young adult and I became confident in time. If someone had offered me surgery, I may have taken it, but I don’t think I’d be as confident 15 years later as I am now if I had not learnt to accept myself the long and slow way IYSWIM.

[PaleGreenGhost]

cakedays I'm exactly the same re nipple stimulation. I wouldn't give that up willingly. It would almost be as bad as losing my clit. But at 18 to be quite frank I didn't know that about myself. I'd had plenty of sex but none of great quality!

I assume that maybe not everyone's nipples are like this as so many people seem to be OK with boob jobs or reductions.

As an aside a few posts have mentioned EE size, I didn't know that existed (and I'm FF). Is this particular to a brand or shop?

[PaleGreenGhost]

Agree with PP that correct fitting bras can make your boobs look and feel a lot smaller. I think all the ads with models wearing bras that shove their boobs right up mislead us about what fitting looks like. "Boob or bust" or "a bra that fits" are good.

[CharlieParley]

[quote cinammonbuns]@MeadowHay thank you I will tell her to get measured when she can. I was surprised at the size too as her breasts don’t look that big to me and I wondered if they got it wrong. It was at M&S I’m not sure how good they are.

I think she has some good bras, some bad ones she is on a student budget but maybe if I offer to buy her some it may help. The problem is she is not really worried about support but more about size and would want a bra that made them look much smaller.[/quote]
I once tested the local bra-fitting services and M&S was one of the worst. They still added 4 inches (the formula used 50 years ago when bra fabric was very different from today). This allows M&S to match the customer to the bra sizes they sell, instead of matching the correct size to the customer. M&S simply don't cater for bigger cup sizes on smaller bands.

You can easily do it yourself or visit Debenhams, John Lewis or Bravissimo. They measure well and stock the necessary sizes.

I'm a size 16 and a 32G, so I honestly doubt your daughter is a 32. I can only echo other posters - a properly fitting bra can be life changing for those with bigger breasts.

[CharlieParley]

Also, I wear Molke bras sometimes and in their type 1 fabric I find they minimise my size. I used to get annoyed and embarrassed before when doing upside down postures in my yoga classes, but the Molke bras have changed that completely.

[StuntNun]

My breasts didn't finish developing until I was about 19. Do you think she would consider waiting so she could be sure no more development was likely?

I echo other comments about her being in the wrong bra size. I wear size 12 tops but sometimes have to size up to a 14 because of my boobs and I wear a size 28 back. She can't be 32 inches under bust because then her waist would have to be at least 32 inches which would be a size 14.

[Whatwouldrowando]

I had a breast reduction aged 42, op. If I'd been able do it at 18 I would have. I was a 10/12 with 36dd breasts - and yes, I had proper fittings/bras and went to specialist shops for them; it made no difference in the awkwardness of them, not being able to play sports comfortably, getting catcalled etc etc. My only regret is not getting them done earlier. I'm now a C and frankly would go down to an A if I could.

(I'm a GC feminist and very aware of other reasons why young women might want to reduce or remove their breasts... but I really think breast reduction should be offered to women who want it.)

(Happy to message with your daughter if she would like. Or you.)

[Whatwouldrowando]

Sorry, 36ff breasts!

[BilboBercow]

Honestly I wouldn't object to having it done as I would have loved not to have gone through the constant attention and harassment I received with large breasts as a teenager and 20 something.

I'd say she should probably wait a bit though if possible because I was around a 30EE at that age and I'm a 32HH now (at 40)

[Shefliesonherownwings]

Op I had a reduction 9 years ago aged 28. I’d wanted it done since I was 18 and spent years saving and researching. I went for several consultations at different places in London. 9 years and two children later they have gone back up in size although not the H cup I was before. I’m about an E now. It did slightly impact my ability to breastfeed, not in terms of supply but more nipple shape and latch.

In spite of that, I will never regret having the reduction and I wished I’d had it when I was in my 20s. Although I’ve put weight on and my boobs are bigger again, they are still perkier than before I had them done and those years of being able to buy tops and dresses off the shelf, not having back and shoulder pain and more importantly not being ashamed of them were wonderful. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.

[MrGHardy]

"has an internship this summer which would fully cover the cost of the procedure"

Sorry if this has been asked before, but what does this mean? Why would an internship cover a fully elective medical procedure?

[LolaNova]

She’s definitely wearing the wrong size bra. I’ve always been a 26/28/30G-H (depending on weight, pregnancies etc.) as an adult and tbh my boobs have never looked massive. I’d think most people would say they were slightly on the larger side of average. A 32E is a very normal and not at all disproportionate size.

[Brefugee]

I wish I'd had mine reduced at that age. And after chimdren they just got more enormous. I have hated them (the look, the size, the way they restrict my activities) for ever.

Having said that, one thing that stopped me is that I once read they might grow larger anyway.

But still. Late 50s now so no point but it is my biggest regret

[NewlyGranny]

A family member + much older than your DD - had this procedure. It worked well for her, but she was warned that both nipples would need to be repositioned and she might lose all sensation in one or both, depending on nerve damage.

Worse, there was a radio documentary or podcast about this surgery and a young woman suffered a necrotic nipple - meaning the tissue died: it turned black and dropped off.

She needs to know that the influencer accounts she's probably looking at are essentially advertising, and the more she looks, the more the algorithms will show her one side. I'll try to find the article. It may have been on Woman's Hour.

You just know if it all goes horribly wrong, she'll ask why you didn't stop her. 😕

[youvegottenminuteslynn]

@MrGHardy

"has an internship this summer which would fully cover the cost of the procedure"

Sorry if this has been asked before, but what does this mean? Why would an internship cover a fully elective medical procedure?

I assume they mean the money they make from the internship will cover the costs of the procedure.

[janeapple111]

I was just thinking this last week, I have very large breasts and I am only five foot two and they are very heavy.

I was thinking about a reduction, but I dont want surgery. I am going to lose weight, losing weight reduces our breasts a good bit.

[janeapple111]

And to be honest, the second reason I wanted to get a reduction was because I hate men staring at my breasts, but should i make men force me to slice open my body so i do not get stared at, no I do not!

I think that a lot more women want breast reduction these days, because they are scared to look female, which is sad.

[janeapple111]

@FuckingFabulous

I had this surgery at 18.
My breasts were bigger than your daughter's but i felt horrified by the negative attention they brought me. I wanted them smaller and I had it done on the NHS. No, I couldn't breastfeed past a couple of weeks but I am still so happy I had the surgery. It will be 19 years ago this year and I have zero regrets, but I know for sure I would have been so unhappy to keep my breasts at the size they were

Isn't it sad, that men sexually harassing us , makes us have surgery?

When I was thinking about getting a breast reduction, the primary reason also for me was not because my breasts were heavy, or because I didn't like my body, it was to get men to stop staring at my breasts.

But then I thought, I shouldn't have surgery because men have made me be afraid to have large breasts. Fuck them!

[NewlyGranny]

What Janeapple says!

It's men's and boys' attitudes that need to change, not girls' and women's bodies.

[Shehasadiamondinthesky]

I've had a mastopexy which is basically the same operation but to lift rather than reduce the breasts.
This should only be done if the case is really serious because it leaves life changing noticeable scars and your nipples look like they have been taken off and sewn back on which they have.
You can't go topless afterwards. It's been 30 years since my op and my breasts still look like they've been assaulted in a knife attack.
She needs to know this.

[Arbadacarba]

I've wanted one all my adult life - however much weight I lose, mine don't shrink. They're uncomfortably and unsightly, and have only got more so as I've aged. If I could afford it, I'd get one tomorrow. I say your DD should go for it.

[MsMarvellous]

While I agree with @NewlyGranny 100% the reality is that it we aren't going to change these attitudes overnight.

My friend has huge boobs for her frame. She has always wished she could afford a reduction. The attention (not positive, very aggressive and horrible) from men has damaged her mental health around relationships in subtle but important ways. She has huge issues, or did, at nearly 40 she's dorme a lot of work to improve that.

I would hate that She felt the need but i think I would support her.