It's really simple when you stop all the angst.
Transwomen are men
Transmen are women
We all have every right to dress and act as we choose as long as we do no harm to anyone.
So a transwoman can dress and act in a stereotypically feminine manner if they choose. They remain male. They may find their lives become more or less comfortable. I neither know nor care, on an individual level.
A transman can dress and act in a stereotypically masculine manner with the same response from me as above.
Given that I, an adult human female, often dress in stereotypically masculine clothing and usually do not act in a stereotypically feminine ways many, who choose to believe in such things, would say I must be non binary. I would reply yes, me and a great many other people, male and female, who don't wear clothes for any other reasons than to be comfortable and not to go naked in public. Or no, because classifications of feminine and masculine are different across different societies and have no internal, inherent logic or global meaning.
So I wear a bra because I am large of breast and am happy that I found a version that accords me some comfort. Not because I am feminine, because I am female. Trousers because they are comfortable. Women's trousers because they are cut to accommodate the female form.
Reducing to absolute basics: 100 years ago a woman in trousers was an unusual sight and the woman concerned would be labelled. These days, here in the UK, it doesn't get noticed.
40 years ago men started wearing women's clothing, make up etc, not for the first time in history. They were looked at, called names and, over time, began to be a little more accepted. Then the 90s hit and men went all metrosexual, manbags and guyliner, Gordon Gecko and money reclaimed masculinity.
Now we have men who want to be women. Well, tough. Biology is biology. Dress how you want, live how you want but don't presume to tell women what we can and cannot discuss, accept and refuse when it comes to actually being a woman.
And it is very possible for a transwoman to live 'as a woman' for 30+ years and still know they are male, not to presume upon female sensibilities and to accept that their male body doesn't pass as actually being female, no matter how much surgery, voice and body coaching they may have had.
Like many other GC posters here I am well acquainted with transwomen and transmen, have been for decades. I am not guessing, not hating, not denying them anything. Just as they are not asserting that human beings can change sex.
Though that is, of course, not what so very many say across SM, or what Stonewall would consider acceptable.