Pronouns at work...

[truetuesdays]

I know this has been mentioned on here before but where do we actually stand on refusing to put our pronouns on email signatures?? How far can the employer actually take this? Messages come "from above" that we should all now be doing it. I'm not going to.

I'm tempted to just put he/him but I'm aware this is facetious (although what could they really say?)

This is in local government job.

[quote IDreamOfLogCabins]@Svalberg

Many thanks for replying and that's spurred me on. I'm in what might loosely be described as a global client relationship role so have to take some care. However, I've definitely noticed a difference in tone between emails to myself and my more junior male colleagues. Will go ahead and test out going with initial. last name and see what happens.

[/quote]
Good luck. I fell into so many traps in my first job and resolved not to in my next job(s), so it was initials on letters, never volunteering unless it was something that I wanted to do or benefited me, never making the tea round, and not becoming 'one of the girls'. It got easier as I became more senior, and as technology has moved on.

Jesus... just imagine being the kind of person bothered about telling other people if you’d prefer for them to refer to you as “she” or “he”,

Some people need to get a sense of perspective.

@Taswama

Idream . Without a first name, people will just go back to the more formal Dear Mr Dream / Dear Mrs Dream. They will probably default to Mr.

It's a heck lot easier in my field where Dr is the default and afaik no one is particularly likely to be bothered if they were wrongly addressed as such. But in general I don't see why, if I chose to sign myself as E. Dragon, why a response shouldn't therefore be addressed to Dear E. Dragon, or Hi E. Dragon depending on the appropriate level of formality.

This is in the US so not much help but may be of interest

www.insidehighered.com/news/2021/03/29/court-sides-professor-who-repeatedly-misgendered-trans-student

Personally I am a post gender individualist and being forced to identify myself using pronouns violates my human rights. I insist on being addressed by my name at all times because I choose not to label myself with pronouns.

This is an interesting read:

'When You Put Preferred Pronouns in Your Email Signature'

leelaventura05.wixsite.com/website/post/when-you-put-preferred-pronouns-in-your-email-signature

@Josiemac93

Pronouns are important! What makes you not want to write them? I don't see any issue in popping your pronouns at the bottom of an email.

@Josiemac93 Do you just 'pop' your age or sexual orientation at the bottom of every email as well, because that's how intrusive or personal it feels to many.

@FluffMagnet

They shouldn't be forcing people to "out" themselves. That's the tack I would take - its actively damaging to people not confident to announce to the world who they are, any more than you should force people to announce their sexuality. Also, evidence to show women constantly reminded of their sex perform worse than when left to get on with it. Plus, having experienced plenty of discrimination based on sex in my career, there is no way I will draw further attention to my sex in work correspondence. Just a smattering of ideas how it negatively impacts their employees (including the very ones they wish to help)

Yawn.

Stop telling trans people what is helpful to us and not. Promouns are a good idea - and you can change how you want to be referred to in a click - when you are ready.

I think I'll start writing Mrs Charlotte Smith or Miss Charlotte Smith - that should confuse a few & satisfy said employer.

Yawn also

I don’t identify as trans. If you met me I’d just look like a very butch woman. But ive struggled with gender identity since my very earliest memory.

I detest seeing myself referred to as she. I’ve dealt with that in my own way. And have reached a peace. I desperately, desperately don’t want to bring that baggage of mine into the workplace. Work is a place I can be free of all that.

The idea that I might have to declare pronouns at work, in my email signature, that i see hundreds of times a day...

It horrifies me, almost viscerally. i can feel the adrenaline rising just thinking about it.

Don’t mind in the slightest what others do. But I’d honestly rather put my weight, age and sexual orientation in my email signature than declare a pronoun.

Furx. 12 stone. 53. bisexual.
Neither he, she or they. But say what you like if I’m not there.

Why compulsory though. If someone wants to put their pronoun to help others be clear on their preferences then fine. But you should not have to this.

Pronouns are important! What makes you not want to write them? I don't see any issue in popping your pronouns at the bottom of an email.

They're not important to me. I won't be popping them anywhere.
A bit of respect for other people's feelings around this would be nice. But clearly that's too much to ask. A one way street for sure.

Stop telling trans people what is helpful to us and not. Promouns are a good idea - and you can change how you want to be referred to in a click - when you are ready.

Goodness, as soon as trans people stop telling others what to do, then I'm sure we will get along great. Pronouns are not a good idea to me or many others. So stop telling other people to use them. I will never be ready to do this simply to please other people. Not. Going. To. Happen.

I was at a conference a couple of years ago when the facilitator for each table asked us to introduce ourselves, give one interesting fact about ourselves and give our preferred pronouns.

I said my name, that I am a GC feminist, and that I don’t have preferred pronouns. There was a slightly awkward silence for a few seconds, then the next person introduced themselves.

Surprisingly, the world didn’t spin off its axis.

Promouns are a good idea - and you can change how you want to be referred to in a click - when you are ready.

Some of us will never be “ready” to engage in this bullshit, thanks.

Hell will freeze over before I out pronouns in my email signature. I don't care if other people want to, but it's fundamentally wrong to impose your opinions and viewpoints on other people.

I dont have preferred pronouns and tbh people would only use them when talking about me when I'm not there so couldn't give a shit what they say. Anyone talking to me would use my name.

If others wish to offer their preference I would always use them but never ask nor expect more than that.

said my name, that I am a GC feminist, and that I don’t have preferred pronouns. There was a slightly awkward silence for a few seconds, then the next person introduced themselves.

Someone raised it at work, I emailed telling my boss it wouldn't be happening. She said, "agreed" and we all moved on. If it was required I would contact my union.

I facilitated for years. Sometimes you don't know if someone is male or female and/or how they identify. Then it's "Terry raised an interesting point" "What was Terry saying earlier".

Seconded!

@RobboCop

I thought it was usually Teri for women? But the point stands as Kris for example could be either.

My username is literally Terry!

God knows how brickie's, plumbers decorators and mechanics get by.