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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Woman who has been chained to her partner

93 replies

JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority · 26/02/2021 13:50

Hopefully the link works. link

I was going to title this “couple who have chained themselves to each other” but after reading the report that’s clearly not what has happened. Her boyfriend chained her to him to stop her leaving him.

This woman has been hospitalised due to the ulcers this chain has created on her arm.

Lots of grinning faces on Facebook. This is a woman who has literally been chained to her a abusive partner to prevent her leaving- it’s causing her physical injury- they’re publicising his abuse of her. And people are laughing.

What the actual fuck needs to happen for people to recognise abuse when they see it?

OP posts:
B33Fr33 · 26/02/2021 16:54

The woman on the balcony watchers didn't just egg him on. They paid him to abuse her. The camera was left running as he called the emergency services only stopped when they arrived. And everyone who thinks abuse being publicity makes it ok is fine with that? Madness

heatherhoneys · 26/02/2021 17:35

You’re clearly confused

You're clearly rude.

aweegc · 26/02/2021 17:43

After many years of being gaslit and nobody believing me, I'd have also set up a scenario where others would see what happens had I'd had the chance. I think it's a perfectly reasonable thing to to in certain circumstances.

As for this chaining. FFS. It's horrific. She's got zero chance of getting away from him. Now he's legitimised it too she has even less chance. If she says to someone "help me leave" very likely she'll get a response along the lines if "but isn't the reason you agreed to be chained is that you kept running away and decided on this way to stay together?"

Also another thing that comes to mind is that there's no chance he'll be sitting up falling to porn while she's trying to sleep. I'm wondering how much she's able to say "No dead, I don't want sex tonight" and have him say "Oh ok then. Let's have a cuddle and go to sleep".

Original poster
JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority · 26/02/2021 17:46

@heatherhoneys

You’re clearly confused

You're clearly rude.

No, you have picked up the wrong end of the stick and decided I was saying something other than what I actually said. Therefore you are confused. There is nothing rude about pointing that out. I’ve explained what I was saying. It’s there for you to read and realise your mistake in your own time. I won’t let you derail this thread any further so I will ignore any further goading from you.
OP posts:
Original poster
JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority · 26/02/2021 17:47

@B33Fr33

The woman on the balcony watchers didn't just egg him on. They paid him to abuse her. The camera was left running as he called the emergency services only stopped when they arrived. And everyone who thinks abuse being publicity makes it ok is fine with that? Madness
This just blows my mind. What is wrong with this world? Do they not see these victims as actual people who feel pain? Or do they just not care?
OP posts:
Hm2020 · 26/02/2021 17:49

That poor women this is sick Angry

SweetPetrichor · 26/02/2021 17:59

It’s their 15 minutes of fame. Context will easily have been lost in translation.

tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 26/02/2021 18:12

More like his 15 minutes. He's an abuser, plain and simple. And I'm sure he'll think of other things to try out once this stops getting hits.

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/02/2021 18:32

@SweetPetrichor

It’s their 15 minutes of fame. Context will easily have been lost in translation.
I'd love to know what context gives a lovely, sexism free, non abusive spin to this story. A grown woman chain Ed to a man so she doesn't leave.

What possible context could be OK. Even a 15 minutes/stunt/experiment is fucking dodgy.

JosieJarker · 26/02/2021 18:50

It is sick.
That sore looks really painful.
Im allergic to some metals, gold and even a platinum ring gave me an itchy rash, having a heavy chain made out of god knows what next to delicate skin must be so so uncomfortable even without the fact its joining her to an abusive bastard.
Shocking to see women on a feminist board minimising and defending the blatant abuse of a young woman.
Shame.

JerichoGirl · 26/02/2021 19:04

@SweetPetrichor

It’s their 15 minutes of fame. Context will easily have been lost in translation.
Why do you say that?
vivariumvivariumsvivaria · 26/02/2021 19:10

God love her.

I see stories like that and I find myself talking to my teenage kids - the girl gets "the first time someone scares you, you leave and you come home" and the boy gets "you are bigger, faster and stronger than a female partner. You must remember that because men can accidentally be scary"

It's kind of a buzz kill for them.

Original poster
JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority · 26/02/2021 19:12

I’m trying to figure out what other context there is I’ve missed. Man tells the world he is fed up of his partner leaving when they row so he decides to chain her to him, she initially was against this but he persuaded her. Woman is then hospitalised due to injuries caused by the chain he inflicted on her- man refuses to remove the chain. Yes- I can feel the love in this story. And the laughter just bubbles to the surface.

OP posts:
PotholeParadies · 26/02/2021 19:15

Photographic evidence of ulcers from manacles are not subjective concepts that can be mistranslated.

The physical body and wounds to it are realities that exist independent of human language.

JerichoGirl · 26/02/2021 19:18

@JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority

I’m trying to figure out what other context there is I’ve missed. Man tells the world he is fed up of his partner leaving when they row so he decides to chain her to him, she initially was against this but he persuaded her. Woman is then hospitalised due to injuries caused by the chain he inflicted on her- man refuses to remove the chain. Yes- I can feel the love in this story. And the laughter just bubbles to the surface.
There isn't any other context.

Denial is very strong, we cannot have the status quo disrupted by truth.

Original poster
JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority · 26/02/2021 19:19

If a friend or my sister was doing something either deliberately or accidentally to herself that caused the same ulcers I would be massively worried and urge her to speak to her GP about her mental health. It is not a healthy mind that allows your own body to be damaged in this way.

OP posts:
heatherhoneys · 26/02/2021 19:23

@JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority

I see where we ended up talking at x-purposes, when I read the thread it looked like you had said that you wouldn't take part in an interview if you were abused instead of another poster saying that.

Clearly the MN quote system is what was getting confused.

GoodQueenAlysanne · 26/02/2021 19:34

This is terrifying, who the hell agreed to weld them together in the first place..? Surely the hospital
or police or someone, should be insisting on removing them, and having a chat with her, on her own? She can hardly say anything, with him right there, and no way to run if he tries to take it out on her later?

And this too
"It is not a healthy mind that allows your own body to be damaged in this way".

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