It's frightening. To see where things have ended up on this board.
Frightening to see how mired some posters are in the idea they get to define who another person is—who that other person must be, despite that person clearly saying who they are—even though the reality is that's not your right or power to do so.
Frightening to see how quickly the idea that a woman who simly says nothing more than, 'I am a woman' must be greeted with attempts to force your own beliefs that she can't possibly be onto her.
And yet on this board this is something that happens everyday. I watch as people make every attempt to try and claim that somebody isn't a woman, but can only be what you demand they must be.
I watch as more and more grandiose claims are made in an attempt to take away another's autonomous right to be who they are and to state, "This is me. This is my sex."
I watch language get more and more twisted as posters attempt to strip away another's autonomy.
Yet, despite all that you say and claim, it doesn't change the fact that you don't have a say in who another person is. You have no say and never will over who I am.
I am a woman. That I am trans (a word forced on me by a society that has yet to accept that it does not need to divide women through the use of adjectives like that) does not change that and certainly not because you don't like it. You've had a handul of other women who are trans who say that they're happy with you defining who they are? That's their choice. Their autonomous will. But it is not mine. Your claims about who I "must" be do not in any sense change that I am simply a woman.
No doubt there will be some here who wish to reply to this by using the term 'transwoman' in an attempt to try and other myself and other women who are trans. Sure, if you wish. But if you do so then I will rightfully assume that the same courtesy applies back. That I can use the same tortured use of English to start referring to people as, 'lawyerwoman', 'shortwoman', 'marriedwoman', 'gaywoman', etc. I wonder how long it would take before you'd start to feel (justifiably) aggrieved at being treated that way?
No doubt you'll use sophistry or claims of "science" to try and claim that I can't possibly be a woman. But I would remind you, you don't get a say in the facts of who I am. The fact that I am a woman.
No doubt you'll try and point to the actions of a relative handful of trans people to try and claim – well all sorts of things. But I would remind you that I am not them.
I am me, and who I am happens to include the fact that I am a woman. There is no debate to be had of that. You may not be happy that I am a woman, but that is your issue to deal with, not mine. You may not be able to wrap your head around such a simple concept that trans and non-binary people are who they say they are, or even that non-binary people are non-binary, but that is your issue to deal with, not ours.
And I'm certain there will be very many of you unhappy that a trans woman is posting here and saying this. Unhappy that a woman who is trans is here and has set out her boundaries about herself. But those are my boundaries. My autonomous right to set them about myself.