Would you ok your son wearing a dress?

[KristinaJup]

Candace Owens recently tweeted (in response to Harry Styles wearing a dress on a magazine cover) "Bring Back Manly Men".. amongst other things.

Who really cares if a guy wears tutus and glittery dresses? Prince was hot af in his heels and Makeup.

Imo I would have no problem with it at all if my son wanted to put on a skirt but the tweet gained a lot of traction and I saw quite a few memes and lots of fingers pointed at feminism for "ruining men"

If we carry on this way the next thing will be....women should not be wearing trousers! What do you think?

And try Wikipedia

If that was the case they'd be selling dresses in the boys section of the shop. Which they don't because they are designed for girls.

@buckeejit

Most of these responses are really depressing. Everyone who thinks their son would get bullied, have you discussed with him that people should be able to wear what they like without ridicule or judgement? Ask him what would happen if his mate turned up in a dress & what he &!others would say?

Be part of the change if you acknowledge that society is the problem.

Would you let your 4 year old get a tattoo because they wanted 'to express themselves'?? Exactly. Why? Because they're not old enough to understand the consequences of that decision

@jj1968

Ta *@DidoLamenting*

I also think where it did happen, with a couple of exceptions, it wasn't really about men being feminine, it was more about dandyism, in many ways another kind of performance of masculinity. They were the 'lovers not fighters', often aggresively heterosexual and in a lot of cases very misogynist. Bands like Duran Duran and the american big hair glam bands may have adopted a certain form of aggresive androgyny, but their music videos were full of half naked women writhing around. It was as if for man to present that way then he had to double up on toxic masculinity to compensate.

Obviously there were a couple of exceptions mostly on the London gay scene like Boy George, but I think people forget just how much he was despised by many people, especially the older generation of men. Any boy who'd admitted to liking Boy George or Marilyn at my school would have been relentlessly bullied. Even Wham or Adam Ant made you a bit suspect. The reality of the streets of Northern cities was very different to the Soho nightclubs the new romantics favoured.

Absolutely spot on analysis. You're right about Boy George too. He caused a tremendous fuss at the time. He looked gorgeous but his look never became mainstream.

It certainly did when I was a child, what with being a girl.i was bullied by both teachers and pupils.

Even today, something like half of senior schools have no girls doing a level physics

A tattoo is not removable, a dress is
Don't you ever put yours in the wash?

I didn’t realise so many people still saw this as wrong. I’m shocked by the responses. I can’t imagine not letting your young sons don an Elsa dress to a cinema showing of Frozen 3 when it inevitably comes out.

@TeenyTinyDustinHoffman

Who are trousers designed for? *@Savourysenorita*

Men and women. Women's trousers are shaped entirely different from mens however.

The OP was about boys and girls I thought?

@ReeseWitherfork

I didn’t realise so many people still saw this as wrong. I’m shocked by the responses. I can’t imagine not letting your young sons don an Elsa dress to a cinema showing of Frozen 3 when it inevitably comes out.

Please tell me this is tongue in cheek 🙈

And to be fair, women's trousers are often shaped to be alluring rather than practical, which is a cultural expectation not a practical requirement

certainly many of my climbing trousers are from the men's section, more sturdy and less tight fitting , although I am quite slim

@midgebabe

A tattoo is not removable, a dress is Don't you ever put yours in the wash?

You're still allowing them to make a choice that they do not understand the consequences of. Sometimes you've got to be the adult and guide them for their own protection

.

PPs who say they would worry for their children - the question is would you allow...Not would you make your son wear a dress... Genuinely surprised at the amount of control you have over what your over 3 year olds wear.

@Awarethebear It's really not. Shalwar kameez is worn by people of all religions from an Indian background- Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Sikh, Buddist, Jain etc. The long robe worn by muslim men to mosque is called a thobe. Its not a shalwar.

@Griefmonster

PPs who say they would worry for their children - the question is would you allow...Not would you make your son wear a dress... Genuinely surprised at the amount of control you have over what your over 3 year olds wear.

Why surprised? People generally buy clothes for their 3 year olds, and most of them buy from the boy/girl section as appropriate. The question didn't state an age. I think most posters are assuming older child who has more say in what they wear.

Condoms are designed for men. Dresses are designed for girls. It's no more strange to ask a woman to Don a condom than it is to ask a man to Don a dress. Both are designed for the opposite sex. Fact.

A condom is designed specifically for a penis, for males. A dress is designed to be supported by a pair of shoulders. I don't know where you're from, but round here boys, girls, men and women all have a pair of shoulders. So dresses are designed for anyone who fancies them. Fact.

... now haha your wholes just getting deeper.

That's a Buddhist thing, yeah?

I can't imagine anyone having a problem with it. It honestly shocks me that anyone does. I'm especially surprised to see posters on Feminist Chat having a problem with it, considering FC is usually pretty gender critical.

One of the main reasons we're having to deal with the fallout from all the trans identity politics stuff is due to society becoming far more rigid about people having to adhere to strict gender norms, and the resultant insistence that if you do anything society has coded as being for males/females, it means you actually are male/female and need permanent surgery, non-reversible drug treatments, etc.

I'd far, far rather live in a world where a boy can wear pink or skirts and still be a boy, than a world where boys are told if they like pink it means they're really a girl and need major surgery to 'fix' their bodies, and one where girls are encouraged to like trucks and get dirty if that's what they happen to like, rather than be told if they like trucks and getting dirty it means they're really boys and should be chemically sterilised so they don't develop breasts and start periods.

If society was more accepting of men/boys liking things coded as being "girly" or "feminine" we'd have a hell of a lot less men believing they're entitled to invade female spaces.

Wrap them in cotton wool and don't let them step out of line is not my idea of good parenting. Supporting them when people bully them, teaching them that they are ok however they are, that is good parenting , wether it's clothes or maths , the principle is the same

@Savourysenorita
So, ignoring the fact that the dress was about boys and girls, not men and women:

If a designer was to design a "dress for men", tailored to fit a man, would it be acceptable in your view for a man to wear it?

Unless there have been a few name changers, it's not the regulars who are promoting such sexist positions

Of course I would. I don't intend to actively put toddler DS in dresses but when he's old enough to express a preference, he can wear what he jolly well likes. Forcing people into boxes does more harm than good. I do wonder how far the, 'but other folk won't like it!' brigade would go to avoid censure. People didn't like the suffragettes either.

.