Express and Star article - head of British Toilet Association pushing for mixed loos

[Fenlandmountainrescue]

Apparently, in order to get us all back shopping again, it is essential that we should all share toilets. Because that is cleaner?

Yes and sometimes thats very neccessary. But thats only one. If you both need the loo I have to take him in then queue seperately for me. If there's only one you have to wait even actually if DS is some physical distress doing so. Only i can take him in. Unisex means a BF or other family member can take him in knowing they can nab me if actually DS needs more assistance than anticipated. When DS is really desperate and dives in the men's cos we cant find the disabled or its occupied (with a dad taking 3 mixed sexed toddlers in which wouldnt be necessary with unisex loos) i can dive in after him and make sure hes ok without embarrassing every one present.

I know many women object. But certainly not every

Unisex bu design is one thing, mixed sex by default is quite another.

I know many women object.

Yes many women do object. I’m sorry but your child’s needs do not override my daughter’s needs for a space free from men. A woman or girl should always have the right to privacy and dignity when needing to do something as intimate as urinating, changing her sanitary wear, etc.

That’s what the disabled toilets are for. I have a special needs daughter and I don’t want her sharing with males.

If the disabled is full and its a choice of soiling himself or the ladies, were in the ladies generally anyway. If you go to France the disabled loo is rarely seperated anyway.

If the disabled is full and its a choice of soiling himself or the ladies,

And if there’s a male in the female toilets, my daughter will refuse to go and soil herself, as she was abused and is distrustful of men. The only way to solve this issue is to have three toilet areas, make, female and unisex. It’s not right to force either sex to share, because of a minority of people who need or desire mixed toilets,

If you go to France the disabled loo is rarely seperated anyway.

We’re not in France, so that argument is pointless. And if you go to some other countries, people have no toilets so shite in the bushes. Charities are working in developing countries to provide single sex toilets to protect girls. Why do you think they’re doing that?

Yes many women do object. I’m sorry but your child’s needs do not override my daughter’s needs for a space free from men.

Don't worry my son won't ever be in the same cubicle.

Object away. You won't change anything. You'll just make a SN boy feeling shitter about something he already feels shit about.

Thankfully most people in real are actually very understanding.

Object away. You won't change anything. You'll just make a SN boy feeling shitter about something he already feels shit about.

But it’s ok to make my disabled daughter feel shit?

How long can that be your solution though - I assume he is a child now but at what age will he/you be comfortable for him to go alone?

As ok as it is for you to make my DS feel shit and be physically ill?

Really the argument gets no where. Some people want single sex. Some unisex.

Most people want single sex. A much smaller number of people want unisex. The disparity in numbers there is not irrelevant.

Lordfrontpaw

There is no solution, until there is unisex loos or consideredably more designated disabled loos.

Other than we leave it longer waiting for the disabled as he has become more aware. But that can cause withholding, soiling and even more problems and medication.

As ok as it is for you to make my DS feel shit and be physically ill?

I wouldn’t be the one doing that, you would, by not using the accessible toilets. Again, why should your son be permitted to use female toilets and make my daughter feel distressed and refuse to use the toilets. There are many young girls that would refuse to use toilets, changing rooms, etc, if men are permitted in, because they have been abused.

This is a genuine question as you and I both want what is best for our children, so will never agree on this. Do you think we should have three toilets, female, male and mixed sex?

But thats only one. If you both need the loo I have to take him in then queue seperately for me
I dont get this, you say mixed sex so you can both use the loo, then you say this which implies your son goes in the mixed sex disabled loo, then you go queue in the ladies? Why not use the disabled while your in there with your son?

No i think we should have unisex.

You have also missed my original explanation that explained we much prefer the disabled. But again there is usually only one. Sometimes we cannot wait. Why does your child's needs top mine? It's a difficult situation as as thing stand we all muddle through whilst trying to be respectful to other users.

We don’t need unisex - we need more accessible loos. You can’t just solve one groups problem by taking away from another group.

My sister has dementia and is going blind - I want her to feel safe in a public loo (she has days when she is fine but the blindness doesn’t go away). This is why we need single sex loos and changing areas.

No i think we should have unisex.

And lots of other women don't.

The push for unisex (or gender neutral in today’s terms) is not to address the issue of accessibility - this is quite another fight.

If loos are made unisex you can bet your boots that it is not for the benefit of the disabled. It is all in the name of ‘inclusivity’ (which these days seems to forget the disabled).

Why not use the disabled while your in there with your son?

Actually sometimes i do. Especially if there is a double door or we've had a long wait for the disabled. Or DS is not well and cant be left while i go in

But if you object to your female child having no privacy. How do you think a tween male child feels about having their mother do their business in the same cubicle with absolutely no privacy other tgan turning ypur back (or wheelchair).

And I'm also aware that someone else might be outside who can only access that loo.

No i think we should have unisex.

Why not three toilets, so everyone feels that their dignity and privacy is respected? That way everyone is happy. I don’t understand why they should ALL be mixed sex.

Because those pushing for inclusivity are all a little that. It’s not ‘accessibility’ - just access.

There isn't any situation which is going to work for everyone. But mixed sex toilets are not what the vast majority of people, of both sexes, want.

Hazel, you see the irony there yes?

Sorry my autocorrect is a bit weird. ‘All about that’

We don’t need unisex - we need more accessible loos. You can’t just solve one groups problem by taking away from another group.

And yet that is so often what proponents of self sex loos do.

Dad and 3 toddlers? Don't you dare use the ladies, use the disabled . Don't want men in the ladies. Label the disabled gender neutral (Tate modern).

We will never agree. Which was the point . Not every woman.