Honor Blackman dies- news reader refers to her “two adopted children”

[LittleRa]

Not sure if this is the correct section but Bond actress Honor Blackman has died of natural causes aged 94. I happened to be reading the family’s statement online at the same time as the BBC news reader was reading it and I noticed the statement said she “will be greatly missed by her two children Barnaby and Lottie” whereas the news reader said she “will be greatly missed by her two adopted children Barnaby and Lottie”. Why?! A glance at her Wikipedia entry shows she adopted them in 1967 and 1968.

Don’t know but it sounds a bit shit.

I bet she never once described her babies like that.

They are her children. I hate when the media does that.
Sad news.

So sad to hear about Honor Blackman

In answer to your question, as an adopted person myself, I’m afraid there are many who still think ‘adopted’ means you’re not the ‘real’ parent/child (I still get people who ask me about my ‘real’ parents if I tell them I am adopted. They don’t mean it badly but it is rubbish all the same.

This children were Honor’s children. End of.

That’s what I thought! It really jarred! When I heard him say it I thought how odd to mention the fact they’re adopted at this moment in time, and I checked the family statement that I was reading at the time. The fact it wasn’t mentioned in their statement made it all the more odd for the BBC to mention it.

*This

*Those (stupid auto correct) sorry!

Perhaps they meant well? It reflects well on her and her determination to become their mother that she went through that for their sakes- it was a hellish process to adopt in the 60s. And they were, in fact, adopted- they presumably know this and know she loved them and chose them.

@ChloeDecker That’s horrible and so insensitive of people.

I don't really get how it's offensive. I'm sure she was honest with them about the adoption. I think we need to fight this culture of bring offended by undisputed facts tbh. It's a slippery slope.

Well that’s crap. Legally they are her children and I bet she loved them as such. Not only is it rude to differentiate, it’s none of our business.
💐 to them.

I don't really get how it's offensive

Because it doesn’t need saying, and from the statement issued by her family she considered them her children. It’s no one else’s business and didn’t need saying.

@Bluntness100 I didn’t say it’s offensive (also it probably is), I said it jarred and I think it’s rude and unnecessary to be said, at the moment of her death.

I think it is reasonable information to give. It isnt intended to be hurtful or dismissive in any way. Just facts and ones that show her in a good light.

Yes should just be "children".
Sad to hear about her death. Watching her interviewed she always seemed like she would be a right laugh and a great party guest.

RuffleCrow

Because to those children, Honor was their mother. Not their ‘adopted mother’.

It hurts to have that distinction highlighted constantly and especially at a sad time like this.

I know I’m adopted. Always have known. It’s nothing to do with that. It’s about people using a phrase that is unnecessary and divisive.

There is a difference between someone saying ‘I’m adopted’ or ‘I have adopted a child’ to a journalist choosing to emphasise Honor’s ‘adopted children’ when there’s was no need to describe them in this way. Would they also have said about another family, ‘Such and such’s children or ‘Such and such’s children or ‘Such and such’s children? No they wouldn’t because it is a description that is totally unnecessary in that context.

By the journalist stating ‘adopted children’, it is an unconscious dig that she didn’t give birth to them as if that makes someone a different or any less of a mother.

I never say this to people in real life though because I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or cause a scene but it is an insensitive thing to say. It just is.

Yes it was really strange when the statement was otherwise read verbatim.

I agree to some extent, as an adopted person myself, BUT always notice that sometimes news bulletins contain odd-sounding sentences, simply because they’re trying to cram a lot of info in a few seconds. So descriptions occur like “the thrice married John X said”, or whatever. So if they’d had longer, they might have said “She’ll be sadly missed by her two children. She adopted both Lottie and Barnaby and built a loving family, which was another wonderful thing about her.”

It doesn’t ‘show her in a good light’ at all, @RaininSummer. You adopt because you want children, not because you’re some selfless do-gooder. — the idea that you’re Mother Teresa won’t survive your first adoption information evening. And one of the most deforming and toxic expectations of adopted children, from toddlerhood and into adulthood is the idea that they should be ‘grateful’.

RIP Honor Blackman
Thinking of her family and friends

it was a hellish process to adopt in the 60s

No, it wasn't!

It feels like it’s differentiating between an adopted child and a “real” child if you actually spell it out. It’s unnecessary. I was adopted at birth and would be mightily pissed off if someone referred to me as “evil’s mum’s adopted child”. I’m just her child and as she says “I couldn’t love you any more even if I had given birth to you”.

Would you expect details in a three-sentence radio obituary of how someone’s ‘IVF children’ or ‘children that she had via a surrogate’ survive her?

Sadly this sort of language is really common, similar to the morons who ask me “who is his real dad?” Me you fucking idiot, I don’t say that, tempting though.

Agreed. Nobody ever says ‘She will be missed by her birth children’. No need to mention how they became her children at all.