Reddit: Very Helpful individual wants women punished at work for avoiding ladies' room now used by trans woman

[Durgasarrow]

www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/eq1iia/at_work_someone_has_came_out_a
On the "AskTransgender" subreddit.
"At work someone has came out as a female (formerly male). All the female employees are now using the unisex disabled toilet (which up until now, was only used by me), or toilets on other floors. What can I do to make her feel better?"

From the "Ask Transgender" subreddit. Discuss.

www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/eq1iia/at_work_someone_has_came_out_as_a_female_formerly/

Has anyone told the OP on Reddit she's a nasty bully yet?

Michelle

I know people refer to 'nativists' these days so it can't be long until someone coins 'natalvists' (and means it).

I saw this thread. Clearly the women at this workplace aren't happy sharing a bathroom with this individual. It makes you wonder if there's more to it.

I saw it too and thought exactly the same thing.

I was particularly unimpressed with the response that the women in question were doing something 'sick' in their passive resistance. So they say well if you don't like it leave or don't use the toilets and when women do just that the are 'sick'.

It is a sick microagression that the cis women in your office refuse to use the womens bathroom now.

Ah that was the one I was referring to.

I can't understand why people are saying this is a form of ostrasisation. Like going to the bathroom at work is a social event as opposed to something you do alone and with privacy?

It's not about the women avoiding that lavatory per se. It's about them not joining in and validating the person's "femininity performance". The ladies loo is the holy grail of validation, because they imagine all sorts of feminine performance associated with "powdering one's nose" and girl talk in the ladies' room.

TWAT. (Trans women are trans.)

Sicaro TWAT....I love love love that

Sicaro you are a genius

Thank you. I like to think so.

Great post from Chloek90:
I don't get it. A single transwoman feels uneasy in a male bathroom so she uses the female one with the company's blessings. That's fine. Her feelings are valid.
Multiple women feel unsafe in the female bathroom (I'm guessing here, OP never said why they refuse to use the bathroom) and use a unisex disabled bathroom instead. They don't go to hr, they don't ban the transwoman from the bathroom. They basically avoid to share the bathroom. That's not fine, their feelings do not matter, they are all sinister, bigots and passive aggressive.
The transwoman is allowed to feel unsafe or out of place and use whatever bathroom she wants.
The other women should be reported to hr for feeling they can do the same. How is that fair?

I honestly can't see the reddit thread being true. I think it's designed to cause frothing.

The account that started that thread has existed for all of 18 days with very little posting history.

A couple of years ago there was a very similar thread on reddit's legal discussion board. A young transwoman wanted to know which laws they could use to gain permission to use their college gym's female changing spaces. They were given a lot of advice and it apparently worked.

A few weeks after the first thread the transwoman came back, this time to ask what they could do to force the women to use the female changing spaces with them. Apparently all the biological females had drifted somewhere else and the transwoman wanted to find something in the law that'd bring them back.

And remember the school teacher? Who posted that there was now a male, teenaged pupil allowed to change and shower in the girls' changing room. The school had offered a much smaller room to any girl who felt uncomfortable with this arrangement.

(This is in the context of US schools where pupils undress and shower often in fairly openplan facilities, not individual cubicles with a door.)

None of the girls had complained or made a fuss, but first a few then many had decided to use the alternative facility.

The teacher came on to Reddit what to do about this, as the male pupil wasn't happy with the girls excluding themselves (and couldn't, of course, join them in the room provided just for the female students).

The answers were shocking - the girls should be punished, forced to change and shower with their male classmate, the alternative room should be labelled for transphobes, the girls should be excluded, shunned, publicly reprimanded and on and on.

It didn't matter that the teacher stressed that the girls were otherwise including this male classmate in their spaces and groups and were not being mean.

Self-exclusion is an act of non-compliance. It must not be tolerated.

This has come up over and over these past ten years at least in the US.
At Evergreen State College some local high school girls swim teams use the pool. The dressing room is open plan. A well known male flasher started identifying as a transwoman and using the facilities the same day and time as the high school girls. So as not to violate the naked transgender persons rights the high school girls were told that they could use a closet to change in. So they did. Then the swim team made other practice arrangements.

It bothers me that people think it's acceptable to use the disabled toilet as an alternative. Those were hard fought for too.

Women/girls avoiding a female service because males are admitted, may be indirect discrimination. It shouldn't just be tolerated.

Funny how the only woman who doesn't mind, wasn't using the shared toilet anyway!

Women/girls avoiding a female service because males are admitted, may be indirect discrimination. It shouldn't just be tolerated.

you can’t force someone to take a piss

Reddit is hub of truth and wisdom. It’s like being in real life, only better.

So, women in that office have started to use the disabled loo ever since a TW (who according to the pro-trans poster on reddit 'does not pass') has started to use the women's loo. Think about that happening in every office... Think about that happening in every workplace... Imagine the queues!

Reddit is hub of truth and wisdom. It’s like being in real life, only better.

That explains a lot, like the moderation team of twoXchromosomes for example.

Why do we have to say the words 'natal women' - can we not say women, meaning, as we all know, actual women?

So @NoNameIsBeingAccepted, are you saying that women are not allowed to remove themselves from a venue they find uncomfortable or unsafe, because it hurts the feelings of the person making them feel uncomfortable or unsafe? Women are not utilities! We are allowed feelings and to safeguard ourselves! Those women do NOT owe the transwoman validation. I find your lack of empathy to be very disturbing.

Deck the halls - Its possible the employer could be indirectly discriminating on grounds of disability by not providing reasonable access to the disabled loo to the person who can only use that loo.

I don't know if it could be indirect sex discrim because the women are self excluding because of the employer's policy. I doubt it tbh. I'm not a lawyer though! Think that's what was meant.

They're not just using the disabled access toilet, some of them are also using the toilets on another floor.
Presumably there's nothing the employer can do about that.