Empowered by 'sex work'

[Springfern]

Long time lurked on this board. Thought I'd introduce myself!

Looking for some advice. I'm firmly rad fem when it comes to so called sex work. I used to work as a support worker for prostituted women and it was such a grim and depressing job. I've spent a number of years reading about prostitution and the nordic model. This is something I feel passionately about and it makes a lot of sense to me alongside my other feminist views.

The problem is... I'm hearing more and more women arguing that sex work is 'empowering' these days. Friends, colleagues, people who I other wise respect...and its everywhere in the culture (their must be about 10 netflix shows right now which glamorise prostitution!) I find it hard to argue with or get through to them without it sounding as if I am anti women's choice (ironically). I also get very have andninvested and then am probably written off as a crazy woman! Have any of you had an success in these types of conversations? If so how? What have you said? Have you managed to change anyone's mind?

My best response at the moment is rolling my eyes and saying 'the men who pay for it feel empowered' ...I need something a bit more substantial though!

I dunno if I would feel3 empowered by sucking a strangers dick for a fiver tbh

I don’t think anyone would

When people say that's empowering I read it as them saying that's the best women can aspire to. Which would be depressing if true, but luckily it's not, so the next logical thought is, why is this person trying to make me think that it is? How do they benefit from that?

Yeah kittens but the people that write that stuff won’t be the women that are doing that stuff that is for sure

You won’t see them doing the fiver blow job

That's true littlbrowndog. Velveteen, what particular set of circumstances for example would make prostitution empowering for you personally? Is it something you would do?

It's the best that The Likes Of Them can aspire too, I suppose to speakers often do make exceptions for themselves and women of their own class or educational level.

It's the best that The Likes Of Them can aspire too, I suppose to speakers often do make exceptions for themselves and women of their own class or educational level.

Yes, this is true. Whenever I hear comfortably middle class (not a criticism - I'm middle class myself - just an observation) women in the groves of academe they always couch their views in the subjunctive: "If I were to have a choice between prostitution and flipping burgers at MacDonalds/wiping arses for minimum wage in a care home, I'd choose prostitution."

Firstly, the women saying that are only saying it safe in the knowledge that they personally will never have to do any of the above. And secondly, would they fuck. They're actually lying.

Yeah the empowering people believers

Bet the empowering people ain’t got their mums their daughters theirs sons their dads their aunties their uncles doing sex with strangers to be empowered

Funny that or not so much

Empowerment isn't usually linked with a job where you have such a high risk of being assaulted or murdered by your customers either. I don't think violent men distinguish between the empowered "sex worker" and the exploited prostituted woman.

I'm extremely germ phobic and so the thought of wiping arses for a living stresses me out, but I'd still pick that over prostitution because a. less dehumanizing, less dangerous, altogether less unpleasant and b. all things considered the germ phobia aspect would be even worse in prostitution.

Flipping burgers is just tedious and poorly paid. Comes with very low chance of rape, murder, and contracting STIs as a result of one's job.

I wouldn't feel remotely demeaned by wiping the arse of someone who needed help, nor of flipping a burger.
That someone feels these are comparable to being used as a wank-bag and would prefer the latter is ridiculous. I'd love to see them try each 'job' for a day and then confim their assertations. Yeah right.

Yes, it's telling that the ivory tower sex pozzies' idea of "demeaning" is so classist.

If I were to have a choice between prostitution and flipping burgers at MacDonalds/wiping arses for minimum wage in a care home, I'd choose prostitution."

It's also so insulting to these workers, especially care workers who do an essential and very important job. And indeed the clients and customers of these workers. The clients of care workers have no choice in having to use these services. Macdonald's customers aren't harming the counter- staff- to compare these groups with punters is vile.