The daily grind of entitled wankers

[Grace212]

A slightly unusual question for the board

I’m looking at driving again after a very long time. Today I had a refresher lesson. It was nice. But I did find myself wondering, will my world contain more or fewer entitled wankers if I’m driving again? As opposed to frequent public transport and a cab about once a week?

This may be the maddest question on the board but ...life is so full of arses.

I have only been driving three years.

I am only 5ft 1 and would say avoid Ford Focus. I managed to write mine off eight weeks after passing. I then got a Nissan Juke which had around view cameras and gave me a slightly elevated position. Plus the seat goes up a little higher anyway. Everyone says Ford seats don’t generally go up that high. Anyway, in the three years I had that, I didn’t crash once.

I now have a Vauxhall Crossland X which is bigger again. No cameras in this which is hard to get used to. I do have sensors though.

Regarding wankers. I find it easier in the car, at least I’m in my own safe space. I actually find it easier to ignore them in my car than on public transport.

Oh and my husband sometimes thinks I’m too close to the steering wheel in my car. I think because my position alters slightly depending on my foot ware that day, or how much pain I am in.

Who is John? I frequently had the same discussion with clients who were small, for some reason they felt safer rammed against the wheel. In a modern car the airbag inflates and if you are too close can injure you particularly if you have glasses on. In an older car the steering wheel can seriously damage you both internally and externally which is why there is an appropriate seating position irrespective of your height. If you are jammed against the wheel because you can't depress the clutch without, find a different car/instructor. And seating position is one of the first things you should check before purchasing a new vehicle.

In my day, we didn’t have any of these fancy features! I haven’t had a crash, unless you count.....I’m sure Joh will blame me .... a driver who went into me at a roundabout because he was looking at the right hand lane, and according to him, I should have been gone already! He was not pleased when I pointed out he was in the wrong.

I later wished I’d called police and had him breathalysed actually but I was too taken aback.

I had forgotten about car wankers over the years.

Joh I wouldn’t be jammed against the wheel, but about an inch closer than the instructor says.

Re airbags, at 5ft and with a child size neck, some people say either have a child airbag or don’t have an airbag. Not sure what to do there.

Im 5'4 so bit taller but in a lot of cars closer to the wheel than is ideal re air bags. Cars are designed to fit the average man and my legs arent that long.

I would suggest test driving plenty of cars and adjusting wheel, seat to see which fits you best. You may find something a bit higher feels better, you get a better view of the road IMO.

Overall though i like driving and any encounter with wankers is outside of my space generally.

I haven’t driven for 20 years and nothing in car design has changed to suit short people?!

5ft 4 sounds like a dream to me.

' I frequently had the same discussion with clients who were small, for some reason they felt safer rammed against the wheel.'

Because we can't reach the fucking pedals otherwise, John.

Jesus christ.

Yes op is a thick argumentative twat. I asked if saying that makes you feel better, if you can't be that direct yourself, maybe it helps if someone else does it. Do you feel better telling the stupid short women they don't know their arse from their elbow, hmm?

Yes we know we're more likely to die, thanks to car manufacturers ignoring 50% of the population for years. And let's not even think about pregnant women and crashes, the cat manufacturers certainly don't want to have a nice chat about that.

Blah blah boring tbh. You sound like my dad.

Grace it has, most cars you can adjust driver seat height and steering wheel too.

Of course if you adjust it so you feel comfortable some wanker is always ready to say you're doing it wrong and you're going to die... Fuck them tbh. We're way more at risk in collisions anyway, and we'll always look like the car doesnt fit because guess what! They weren't designed with us in mind at all.

They can come and laugh at our funerals I suppose, they might find some self righteous pleasure in that.

You can adjust the height on seats now, often the steering wheel too. Ultimately you need to be comfortable. And I found that as I was driving more and gained more confidence I didn’t feel the need to be so close to the wheel.

Fraggling no way, my funeral is going to be private.

So on balance....yes, I’m just trying to work out which way of life is going to be more or less irritating.

PS both seat height and steering height were adjustable today but the guy said my preferred position was wrong, so I did as I was told.

It was literally an inch on the seat that he was saying to me “you’ll much more damage to yourself in a crash”. I’m not trying to be closer to steering wheel but I have got to reach the pedals.

I've found most of the cars I've had in the last 20 years or so fine except for some the seat belts. Wtf do they make them adjustable but not adjustable enough?

If you are jammed against the wheel because you can't depress the clutch without, find a different car/instructor. And seating position is one of the first things you should check before purchasing a new vehicle.

That's good advice from Joh (autocorrect wants to make that John, obviously).
Japanese-designed cars are IME often quite good - maybe because Asian men are generally not as tall as Europeans?

If you have the option you can change if the roads/ trains are in a mess.

I enjoy driving personally and drive in London (not central) , don't find it too bad. People are quite aggressive but that seems to be a function of getting in a car, men and women can and do drive aggressively. The ones who are v dangerous are usually young men though eg souped up cars roaring up the high street, massive overtakes etc.

OTOH if you can do without then it's easy cheaper and less hassle. Driving is v pricey now and pollution etc. Electric car maybe?

Actually waffling on has been really helpful
Thank you for listening

Here’s the summary

Each week, I have a choice of 4 days on public transport and 2 days of driving

Or I can do public transport 6 days a week with a once a week minicab to reduce the journey a bit on one of the train days.

Which features more annoying blokes? Cos I’m 43, I’ve been dealing with them since I was 14, and I’d like to just be a hermit now with the occasional visit from female friends. Initially the car thing was exciting, but am I just adding to the variety of annoying bloke I have to deal with?

Thank you, lovely feminist board.

I commute on tube, sometimes train (have choice).

Have commuted by car in past and still drive.

Less annoying wankers in car as they aren't actually in your space, pressing legs against you, not 'seeing' you as you're little etc. Also get my feet trod on at least one a week, that's always a bloke that does that, weird. Maybe because of the whole small plus female plus over 40 = invisible thing?

Car yes there are arseholes but they aren't literally in your face.

Interestingly I had a test go on some kind of advanced wearable about 5 years ago (prob standard now lol) and my commute was when I was most stressed, I hadn't even realised. Worse than child wrangling, worse than work.

It depends where you drive I suppose.
The last entitled wanker I'm still seething from was months ago: a white van driver who used aggressive hand gestures after I pulled out in front of him (not too close in my opinion).
A few months before that a woman dived into a parking space I was heading for then shouted obscenities at me
I drive daily and don't see much of it though.

Fraggling, how did it measure stress please?

I’m glad I started this thread, I thought no one would reply!

I’m a confident driver, been driving for decades, frequently on the western arc of the M25 which can have its challenging moments.

Drove on it yesterday - lovely, free flowing, not the usual bunching , but noted more than usual idiot behaviour cutting in and out. Had a brief time going slowly in a queue past a particular fool who had been doing last minute 4 lane cut acrosses - and saw he was openly smoking a big spliff ! That is what worries me about driving now - the illusion that we are all being equal participants in a fast but cooperative dance being destroyed by that behaviour .

Interesting about seating position and airbags. Its something that has never occurred to me. DH sits really close to the steering wheel as he says he feels he has more control. Perhaps he does it because of his short legs (29in inside leg).

I sit almost reclined, with elbows slightly bent ( inside leg 36in).

I shall warn him about the airbag injury thing.

Car yes there are arseholes but they aren't literally in your face.

Yes - it's not as personal.

Have to say this is my favourite thread title ever, Grace212. Sadly I think the EWs are just too prevalent everywhere. I thiink the stuff about testing air bags is discussed in Caroline Criado Perez's book. Nothing anywhere is ever tested on women.

I think that rotating is the answer to the CFs. There is a certain type of train chappie who, if he had been on the Titantic, and was told women and children first would have said 'Don't be silly, my laptop/phone (generally Apple) takes priority. They spend the whole journey manspreading their laptops and award themselves extra points if there is no room for a handbag on the table.

Black cab cabbies are often maligned unfairly. Still remember the cabbie who told me Labour needed a woman leader and that Yvette Cooper was loads better than Jeremy Corbyn.

Good luck with deliberations!

Grace it was something related to blood pressure, hold on I'll see if I can find it.

Just remembered something... It was a trial, and a few of us were seeing weird numbers around how many calories we could consume or similar. When asked, they said, oh its calibrated to average man at present...! We were like, right then (silent eye roll).

Found the site, it was a medical grade thingy

'heart rate, skin temperature, respiratory rate, blood oxygenation). Additional clinical and non-clinical parameters (blood pulse wave, activity and steps, energy expenditure, sleep, heart rate variability , Inter-beat-interval & stress)'

Fraggling, that’s interesting because even if you don’t hate the Tube, some of those factors will be at play because of being underground and in a hot can?

Nettie, these weren’t black cabbies. Sorry if being thick, but not following on the rotating. My work varies, my journey to mum varies but there’s just ...I dunno, playing music out loud, manspreading etc etc, no point changing carriages because it’s all the same. You mention tables though, these are tubes or the trains that don’t have tables IYSWIM.

When dad was alive, the journey pissed me off going once every three or four weeks! Twice a week, urgh.

I should add, in fairness, local minicab firm were great when dad was ill and some days I was weeping openly in their cab! School holidays are always an issue with mincabs, the regulars are doing childcare and an influx of crazy seems to come in.