Old lady.... why is this still an acceptable insult

[FrameyMcFrame]

I've heard it so many times recently.

'You do x,y or z like an old lady'.

Because being compared to a old woman is pretty much like saying you're the lowest of the low, pathetic and deserving of ridicule?

I'm so angry when I hear this.

It's always men who say this.

So just lazy cliches? Not the non-lazy cliches, which take more effort? Good luck with your crusade.

I'm from a culture which reveres and respects the old, and every one of the women who have been the most influential in my life, and whom I most revere, have been over 80, so I've never seen "old" as negative, but I do observe it being used as negative in Western society, and the attitudes that go along with that. It's a pity.

And even when people make the effort to NOT be ageist, it's always by comparing old people to young, such as videos of old men dancing wildly, or old women wearing wildly eccentric clothes or extravagant makeup, and applauding, and saying, "this is how I want to grow old"! As if it's all about preserving their youthful way of life. Which, to me, is not the aim at all.

I know that not all old people are wise, but I think that's what we should strive for: to learn the lessons that life with all its changes and vicissitudes brings us, so as to be able to be respected when we are old.
But it's a vicious circle. I see lots of old people, women especially, fearing old age desperately and trying to imitate the young, and that's when, I believe, they lose respect. We worship youth in Western society, which has led to a certain haughtiness on the part of young people, and automatic dismissal of anyone over 50. Or even over 40.

You are correct of course - cliches are always lazy.

Crusade is a bit lazy too.

“joyless thought police.”

Is up there with lazy cliches too. And pretty mindless.

flo as a tired old lady I see it as a doff of the cap! Nice for you to have the energy.

Dangly flaunt your age with pride, and don't let the punters patronize you!

Dangly you've killed the thread.

🏴‍☠️

As if it's all about preserving their youthful way of life. Which, to me, is not the aim at all.

Exactly. The way advertisers target older people is full of ageist assumptions. In the US, the ads for retirement facilities/sheltered accommodation are full of images of fit-looking older people playing tennis, swimming, and otherwise appearing "youthful." As I have aged, I can no longer do any of these things well, and I don't want to live somewhere that promotes these as the definition of living well in old age or that might consider me diminished because I'd rather sit in a rocking chair and read.

Again, for me anyway, it's recognising the difference between making a valid discrimination or acknowledgement where age is a factor and applying ill-informed, blanket stereotyping and casual insults.

Almost all of us will have physical limitations because of age; some of us, but by no means all, will have cognitive issues- a very tiny proportion of us will be lucky enough to be like the 2 D-Day veterans Harry Read, 96, and John Hutton, 94, who commemorated the 75th anniversary of theNormandylandings by parachuting on to a Normandy beach. Treat every one respect- age should only be relevant, if it is actually relevant.

The casual ageism on MN is pretty dreadful- often on threads where posters are pontificating about how anti- racist/ anti- sexist they are.

This is an example ageist shite that is trotted out on MN,no wonder 'old' is used as an insult when people actually believe this bollox-

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3655640-To-curb-my-parents-chat-under-their-roof?watched=1&msgid=89048764#89048764

My goodness- yes that certainly shows there are MN members who have no problem with being ageist.

That thread is so depressing, but sadly, not surprising.