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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Can you be a feminist if you have long hair?

152 replies

Fizzypoo · 30/07/2019 21:12

I would love to be a feminist. I have read some books, I have read the feminist boards on here for a number of years (before GC) and I have learned about the structural inequality women have, and still have more to learn.

But I have long hair, I like looking hot on a night out and realise this is for Male attention. I have a lovely boyfriend, 2 DC and work in a LA job where I have to be careful about what I say online (and even who I follow on twitter as I'm GC). I would love to be a no nonsense sort of person like Greer and have that inner confidence in what she says with no fucks given, but I'm not.

I would like to go to meet ups in the city I live near, but I don't think I would fit in! I feel like a young naive girl as opposed to a strident feminist woman who knows her shit. Can I really belong in feminism?

OP posts:
Propertyofhood · 30/07/2019 21:17

Wha?!

Of course you can!

I know what you mean about feeling like you don't know your shit (I used to feel like that on here) but definitely try a meet up if you want to.

Fairenuff · 30/07/2019 21:17

Eh?

BluebonicPlague · 30/07/2019 21:21

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WrathofSWhittIeKlop · 30/07/2019 21:23

Lol

MIdgebabe · 30/07/2019 21:23

I own a skirt. Am I allowed to be a feminsit?

WombOfOnesOwn · 30/07/2019 21:26

My long hair makes me feel confident. My mother cut it very short as punishment more than once when I was a child, and for me, caring for it is a way of telling myself I can care for myself better than the caregivers of my childhood.

I've been growing it longer and longer for the decade I've been actively involved in feminism as a movement, and I also allow my body hair to grow (have been for over 15 years). I have seen women of many, many hairstyles and lengths at feminist meetups, and with many levels of "patriarchy-approved" styling choices. No one's waiting at the front with an electric shaver for your head and a tattoo gun to start your purple labrys.

AFistfulofDolores1 · 30/07/2019 21:29

What's wrong with male attention?

cardyop · 30/07/2019 21:33

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RolyWatts · 30/07/2019 21:41

Hmmm yes. You can have long hair... You can have two eyes... You can paint yourself green or purple.... You can have six fingers (although that might get you done for witchcraft).... 🧙‍♀️

terfsandwich · 30/07/2019 21:41

? Long hair takes less effort than short hair. That's why mine's long!

MIdgebabe · 30/07/2019 21:43

AH but what about likening to keep my house clean and tidy...would that exclude me?

Original poster
Fizzypoo · 30/07/2019 21:43

This is exactly what I meant, you seem to know how to fit in with feminism.

I don't feel oppressed in my day to day life, but I feel very strongly about sex based rights for women, such as abortion in n. Ireland. I would love to be apart of the activism within my nearby city. But I don't feel I have anything to offer and wouldn't be included because of my gender stereotypes that I like, such as long hair and the enjoyment of flirting. I most likely shouldn't have posted, I feel like I'm outside looking in and I want to be in.

I used to be a part of the labour party, I care deeply about oppression and I work in a community role supporting people to have a voice. I want to be a feminist but I don't know how, and it's not as simple as you have a vagina so you're a feminist if you want to be.

OP posts:
MIdgebabe · 30/07/2019 21:45

And some people th8nk I’m good looking and I don’t have a cat

Cohle · 30/07/2019 21:46

Yes, of course you can! You will absolutely be welcome at local meet ups no matter how you choose to present yourself.

I think it's a real shame that some posters have responded so unhelpfully to a woman looking to get more involved in feminism but worried about whether she'll be welcomed.

MindTheMinotaur · 30/07/2019 21:48

You sound like a feminist who's got her shit together. Go and join them...

Purpleartichoke · 30/07/2019 21:49

Do you think women should have fewer rights than men?

Yes = you are not a feminist
No = you are a feminist

It really is that simple.

Yes, there are women who try to say that to be a feminist you must follow their opinion on 100 other issues. Those women would be wrong and are doing more harm to women’s equality than good.

WrathofSWhittIeKlop · 30/07/2019 21:50

Why of course you can have long hair.

But,
Is it blue?

MIdgebabe · 30/07/2019 21:53

The question has been asked several times in the last week it seems and can be taken as insulting to feminsits. Like they are all thick or summat. ( disclaimer, may be sensitive today following minor surgery)

QueenOfPain · 30/07/2019 21:54

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Namechangeforagamechange · 30/07/2019 21:55

I think I sort of see where you're coming from OP. While feminism is for all women, there's a small but vocal minority who have a very specific idea of what feminists should look like/who they should associate with etc. Thanks to some very wise advice on here, I'm beginning to learn how to just ignore that and be a feminist in my own way.

Original poster
Fizzypoo · 30/07/2019 21:55

I haven't seen any threads with my question in and I've been following feminst chat threads linked to Twitter for part of the day/week.

I wish my hair was blue @WrathofSWhittIeKlop Grin

OP posts:
SonicVersusGynaephobia · 30/07/2019 21:56

Most of the feminist women I know have long (as in Bob-length or longer) hair Hmm

This is a very odd thing to think OP. I think someone has been misleading you about feminism mischievously.

Original poster
Fizzypoo · 30/07/2019 21:57

I'm not a troll, ask MN to look into me if you like. I've been on MN under lots of different names since 2012 ish

OP posts:
Cyclemad222 · 30/07/2019 21:57

The first step is to submit an application to the feminist authorisation board and see if you'll be accepted as a member Confused

MIdgebabe · 30/07/2019 21:59

Can you Be married and feminist was a theme on at least two threads as a start. No idea about twitter links though . Perhaps an unfortunate case of bad timing?

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