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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

I bought a doll for a boy

77 replies

sashh · 08/07/2019 07:03

So a new relative arrived a few months ago and I got to meet him a few weeks ago.

Like many others I had taken a present but the parents didn't have time to open them on the day. I'd bought a rag doll that I thought looked a bit like his dad.

A few days later, via facebook, I received a 20 second clip of new relative and his dad playing with the doll and both giggling.

I also received a really nice thank you message.

I just wanted to share because I have seen so many messages where dad's don't want their sons playing with 'girl's' toys.

OP posts:

VikingVolva · 08/07/2019 07:07

I've never seen a message along the lines of dads being rude about dolls. I am glad you have normal friends

Rachelover40 · 08/07/2019 07:18

Good for you. Most little boys like dolls, they play with their sisters. Later on the societal conventions kick in and they transfer their affections to other toys but when they're small, they play away. Not like girls do, for example they don't dress them in different baby clothes, put them in a pram and take them out, but like and play with them.

TealGreenBalloons · 08/07/2019 07:24

@Rachelover40 my son plays with his own dolls. And in the exact same way as other children, boys and girls do.
What a bizarre statement that boys don't dress dolls in clothes or take them out in a pram.

Bespin · 08/07/2019 07:32

Good for you, more boys should be able to play with dolls.

BillywilliamV · 08/07/2019 07:35

My girls loved their garage, my eldest used to hold cocktail.type parties on the top floor for all the Hsppyland people!

LinoleumBlownapart · 08/07/2019 07:56

Men dress their children and push them in prams, so why is it odd for boys to play this role? My son dressed his dolls and loved his doll's pram. He said that he's their dad and he looks after them. It's normal.

missnevermind · 08/07/2019 07:59

When mine were little we had to look really hard for boy dolls but they are much more available now that 20 years ago

Soubriquet · 08/07/2019 08:05

I have heard boys not allowed to be playing with “girls” toys.

It’s one thing I checked with my dh before we had children.

He’s fine with it! My ds loves playing with dd’s LOL dolls and dd loves playing with dinosaurs and cars

It’s just toys

CountFosco · 08/07/2019 08:06

DS is nearly 7 and still sleeps with his boy ragdoll along with about 20 other soft toys.

cookiechomper · 08/07/2019 08:09

My 22 month old son loves his older sister's dolls pram and can always be found cuddling and if he sees a baby doll he will cuddle and kiss it.

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 08/07/2019 08:11

Ds1 is 13 and although he doesn’t play with it now will not entertain the thought of getting rid of his baby doll. That doll went everywhere with us when he was little and when ds2 was born he kept calling him “baby bob” after his dolly so ds2 ended up being called “Robert” (not real name) because we liked it.
Exbil would not let nephew have a doll or buggy despite him really wanting one and I always thought it was bizarre because he is/was a great hands on dad and husband and never seen any of it as women’s work. Some people are just odd. It’s seen as ok for girls to play with cars and tractors but boys shouldn’t play with dolls it’s traditional women’s roles being seen as lesser.

GroggyLegs · 08/07/2019 08:15

My 3yo loves real babies, and is currently pushing a toy rabbit round the living room in a buggy.

But his poor rag doll Harry, is naked and lonely in his bedroom. But I don't think it's a boy thing, I hated dolls when I was a child. They creeped me out!

Glad your present was well received OP.

DonnaDarko · 08/07/2019 08:18

I have heard of boys not being allowed to play with dolls and I'm really glad that DP and I are on the same page about this stuff - any toy goes!

DS (3) has a toy pram that he loves. He also plays with one at nursery every day! I've been thinking about getting him a doll for it. He also absolutely loves pink and purple, so we just painted his room purple and for his birthday he got a pink scooter!

Mitebiteatnite · 08/07/2019 08:18

I work in Early Years and I can tell you there are still a significant amount of boys whose parents discourage them from playing with dolls. They get to play quite happily while at pre school though

Trooperslaneagain · 08/07/2019 08:21

What's your point, caller?

Pinkyyy · 08/07/2019 08:29

My boy isn't allowed to play with girl's toys. There are plenty available for boys.

CherryPavlova · 08/07/2019 08:33

Any lad with sisters plays with dolls. It’s not a new thing. My son had a baby boy doll called Rory that his younger sister still has.

Thingybob · 08/07/2019 08:41

Good grief I find it sad that it is considered unusual for boys to have dolls as all my sons and grandsons have had dolls, pushchairs and accessories. (1970s-Present)

Anatomically correct dolls like these are always favourites and if more young children had them maybe we wouldn't see so many confused adolescents?

TealGreenBalloons · 08/07/2019 08:47

@Pinkyyy could you enlighten us which children's toys require a vagina to operate them? I assume that's what makes them 'girls toys'.

NeurotrashWarrior · 08/07/2019 08:50

Was about to post about finding an anatomically correct one, peterkin is a good make. My youngest coincidentally pulled his out today got the first time to play with (he's just last one)( prior to this he'd treated it with suspicion. I actually think he thought it a rival baby and it confused him when it did t squeak on poking.

Today he's been kissing him and tried to nibble fingers checking with me by looking guiltily up at me!

I loved one that did wees as a child

Pinkyyy · 08/07/2019 08:53

@TealGreenBalloons don't be so vulgar. If my child can identify what's for boys and girls, I'm sure you can too. You just think you're such an amazing feminist if you pretend not to.

BernardBlacksWineIcelolly · 08/07/2019 08:55

My DS’s both loved their dolls house. Boys live in houses too and enjoy re-enacting their daily life

I’m glad your new relative likes his doll!

Bluetit101 · 08/07/2019 08:55

When I was pregnant with DD1, DS (2.5 at the time) asked for a baby and a buggy...
DH wasn't keen but I got him one anyway.
I got him a boy doll and he named him Daniel Son after the karate kid! He loved it and I think it helped him prepare for when our DD was born

BernardBlacksWineIcelolly · 08/07/2019 08:57

I think Pinkyyy is having a joke

We all know that toys that interact with your genitalia are the only kind designed for one sex or another, and they certainly aren’t for children!

Lllot5 · 08/07/2019 08:57

I had three boys and a girl. They all just used to play with each other’s toys. Dolls, prams, garages, cars, just a free for all.
Would I buy a pram or a doll for a boy? Mmmm don’t know I have to say.

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