Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Why can’t transgender lesbians just date each other?

529 replies

Hithere12 · 17/06/2019 01:41

I keep seeing online transgender women so angry a female lesbian doesn’t want to date someone trans, but it begs the question why can’t they just date each other?

If they genuinely believe a trans woman is without question a woman and they are attracted to women then surely this would solve all their problems in terms of finding a partner? They could just date each other? Unless they don’t want to date trans women because they don’t see trans women as real women? Hmm Confused

OP posts:
ElliF · 12/02/2023 12:48

Hithere12 · 17/06/2019 01:41

I keep seeing online transgender women so angry a female lesbian doesn’t want to date someone trans, but it begs the question why can’t they just date each other?

If they genuinely believe a trans woman is without question a woman and they are attracted to women then surely this would solve all their problems in terms of finding a partner? They could just date each other? Unless they don’t want to date trans women because they don’t see trans women as real women? Hmm Confused

Roflmao!
This has to be a troll.
Maybe because lesbians are not interested in male genetalia?

BernardBlacksMolluscs · 12/02/2023 12:49

MargaritaPie · 12/02/2023 12:48

"pretend"?

That's a bit transphobic.

nah

not getting into it with you either

pretty sure you're a real person, but a sexist, weird one. not worth my time on a sunday afternoon!

MargaritaPie · 12/02/2023 12:49

"You never follow the links here"

Links here tend to be the daily mail. It's not considered credible.

Re the BBC article, look who they used as a source for it:

www.thepinknews.com/2021/11/03/lily-cade-bbc-trans-transphobia/

SinnerBoy · 12/02/2023 12:50

*MargaritaPie · Today 12:48

... - -to pretend that (they're members of the opposite sex) - -

That's a bit transphobic.

How on Earth can it be "transphobic" to point out that MtF trans people are men and not women, no matter how much they insist?

ElliF · 12/02/2023 12:55

@Veronicawiththefacts
Me, me, me, me, me.
Why does this discussion have to centre around you?

risefromyourgrave · 12/02/2023 13:05

MargaritaPie · 12/02/2023 12:49

"You never follow the links here"

Links here tend to be the daily mail. It's not considered credible.

Re the BBC article, look who they used as a source for it:

www.thepinknews.com/2021/11/03/lily-cade-bbc-trans-transphobia/

Lol at the fact you say The Daily Mail is not a credible source and then give us a Prick News link! At least the Mail is signed up to IPSO…

SinnerBoy · 12/02/2023 13:07

MargaritaPie · Today 12:49

Links here tend to be the daily mail. It's not considered credible.

There are links to far more sources than the Daily Mail, of course, including to official Government statistics, but you ignore them, too.

As for Pink News, they publish verifiable lies and slander daily.

ElliF · 12/02/2023 13:14

What is a transgender lesbian?
Is that what used to be called a crossdresser?

DeanVolecapeAKAelderberry · 12/02/2023 13:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Veronicawiththefacts · 12/02/2023 16:22

I’m very sorry this occurred nepeta. I hope you had and have proper support to around this. your experience sounds very scary, and I hope nothing like that happens to you again!

I’m not a professional, but being able to remember a sound like that sounds like a symptom of ptsd to me. I was diagnosed with this following sexual abuse i experienced in my past. I worked with a therapist on techniques which helped with symptoms.

thanks for your share!

Veronicawiththefacts · 12/02/2023 16:22

@nepeta

Veronicawiththefacts · 12/02/2023 17:01

as far as the rest of what I saw,

i’m glad you don’t find me angry or sexist, but I’m sorry you don’t appreciate my sense of humor ;)

why would I get angry regardless of the pronouns you use? What you call me doesn’t change my life that much. I’m satisfied with who I am, and don’t require your validation at this time. I’m glad that you find so much joy in your own experience of womanhood and feel like “the real deal.” However people respond to me doesn’t define my womanhood. A part of me wishes I “passed” less well, to be honest. “Passing” in my experience decreases safety more than it increases it.

moreover, for I guess the third time now that I’ve said this, I don’t draw validation from the experiences I shared, positive or negative. I self-validate :-)

I simply shared my experiences because there was a lot of conjecture as to the experiences transsexuals must have, and based on my experiences, this conjecture was not accurate to experiences I’ve had. So I gave more of an even view of my own personal experiences, for the sake of increasing awareness and representation purposes. They aren’t your experiences to rewrite, or gaslight away if you find them inconvenient to your philosophies. If there was a board that discussed lesbians who was born with vaginas, I would never question your right to participate on it.

as far as the sexualization of a person, rather than their womanhood being what men respond to—

this one surprised me because I felt blamed as a victim. It may surprise you, or not, to learn that I have been approached by men while fully clothed, without smiling, and wearing zero makeup. I don’t actively look for attention, and sometimes I find it uncomfortable. Being that I’m attracted to some men, and overall men more than women, it doesn’t probably bother me as much as it might bother you depending on the man and the situation, but these situations can be terrifying. I have been both sexually harassed and abused. Blaming me for instances of my own sexualization is actually exactly what both men and females, though sadly many more females, have done to me numerous times when I’ve been the victim of actual crimes. I think there are a whole lot of women in the world, and not enough sisters— Im not sure the responsibility should fall on me so much to protect my safety so much as it should be on men to not commit crimes, but I guess that’s the nature of the world in which we find ourselves.

as far as who people are on the internet, I guess it’s hard to say. That cuts both ways. For all I know, there are several men on this chat saying they are women. I choose to simply respect you all, assume you are who you say you are, proceed assuming best intentions on both sides in good faith. I think that’s the best way to establish meaningful and constructive dialogue.

I don’t have as much time to jump on here today, but I’ll try to return at some point.

thanks again for all your thoughtful comments. I feel empowered and strong today :-)

nepeta · 12/02/2023 17:08

My point, in telling my story, is that in my experience most women don't want to get harassed in grocery stores, etc., and don't regard being asked their phone numbers as some sort of validation of their desirability, but a bloody annoying nuisance, and potentially worrisome as someone who ignores social norms enough to pester people doing their chores might ignore other social norms, too, such as the one about not grabbing unwilling women or not stroking their breasts etc.

WickedSerious · 12/02/2023 17:09

ElliF · 12/02/2023 13:14

What is a transgender lesbian?
Is that what used to be called a crossdresser?

I thought it would be a woman pretending to be a man?

Or a man in a dress pretending to be a lesbian?

Theeyeballsinthesky · 12/02/2023 17:16

It’s the second one - it’s important to be clear that we’re talking about TW (men) berating lesbians who are only attracted to biological women for not wanting to sleep with them

DarkDayforMN · 12/02/2023 17:21

detector.dng.ai

Yep. I put a few of Veronica’s comments in there and it’s coming up positive for AI generated text!

A whole new way to be annoying. 🤦‍♀️Presumably someone was feeding prompts into GPT-3 along the lines of “You are a lesbian trans woman. Write a persuasive argument to explain to TERFs why trans women can be lesbians.”

Were there bot arguments on here before? I missed that.

Happylittlechicken · 12/02/2023 17:23

They won’t date each other because they are straight men basically, the whole campaign to get lesbians to sleep with males is conversion therapy by stealth. The head of stonewall even referred to lesbians who won’t date males with a trans identity as ‘sexual racists’. That’s from an organisation that is supposed to support lesbians.

DarkDayforMN · 12/02/2023 17:24

(Not the most recent comment though. That one is showing up as written by a human.)

Naunet · 12/02/2023 17:27

MargaritaPie · 12/02/2023 12:48

"pretend"?

That's a bit transphobic.

It’s accurate.

ShireWifeofNigelFarage · 12/02/2023 17:43

Mate, this happens to anyone with a pair of tits under the age of about 35.

It’s not a good thing and most women hate it.

Why can’t transgender lesbians just date each other?
ShireWifeofNigelFarage · 12/02/2023 17:44

DarkDayforMN · 12/02/2023 17:21

detector.dng.ai

Yep. I put a few of Veronica’s comments in there and it’s coming up positive for AI generated text!

A whole new way to be annoying. 🤦‍♀️Presumably someone was feeding prompts into GPT-3 along the lines of “You are a lesbian trans woman. Write a persuasive argument to explain to TERFs why trans women can be lesbians.”

Were there bot arguments on here before? I missed that.

I hope they set it generate fewer words next time. Under 450 would be much better.

BoredOfThisMansWorld · 12/02/2023 17:47

DarkDayforMN · 12/02/2023 17:21

detector.dng.ai

Yep. I put a few of Veronica’s comments in there and it’s coming up positive for AI generated text!

A whole new way to be annoying. 🤦‍♀️Presumably someone was feeding prompts into GPT-3 along the lines of “You are a lesbian trans woman. Write a persuasive argument to explain to TERFs why trans women can be lesbians.”

Were there bot arguments on here before? I missed that.

Is that worth reporting to MN? I presume they don't want bots on the site.

And I hadn't heard of the detector thing before. Really useful to know, thanks.

nepeta · 12/02/2023 17:57

BoredOfThisMansWorld · 12/02/2023 17:47

Is that worth reporting to MN? I presume they don't want bots on the site.

And I hadn't heard of the detector thing before. Really useful to know, thanks.

I put in the first 700 or so words of Veronica's first post into the detector, and it came back with 0% of AI, which means that it would be certain the text is written by a human.

Then I put in the list 450 words of that same post (no overlap with the first sample I chose), and the detector concluded that the likelihood was 93% (0.93) that that part of the first post was written by an AI model.

So the detector seems to need quite a bit more work? Or bits and pieces of the posts are AI and others are not?

DarkDayforMN · 12/02/2023 18:11

Or bits and pieces of the posts are AI and others are not?

This one is my guess. I definitely don’t think all of Veronica’s posts are AI written. I was actually surprised it showed as positive. I think someone may have been using GPT-3 or one of the other ones to construct arguments for them, and editing in their own personal thoughts and responses. That would explain both the speed and volume of posting and the inconsistent detector result.

Baldieheid · 12/02/2023 18:15

So now we have artificial "women" AND artificial posts to deal with.

Jeeze, it's almost like the poor wee incels don't get enough attention from their mummies....

We

Are

Not

Your

Mums