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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Would a move back to single sex education help our girls?

329 replies

BalletBunting · 14/06/2019 15:15

I've been meditating on this recently - particularly seeing reports of the shocking levels of sexual harassment girls experience at school, as well as seeing the levels of gender stereotyping both my DC (one of each) have experienced since they were born. It made me wonder whether a move back to more single sex schools (for secondary at least) could actually have a positive effect on children of both sexes (and girls in particular)

Less sexual harassment, less stereotyping and as I understand the research shows that children do better in single sex environments, where they don't feel they need to 'perform' for the opposite sex. It also means that difficulties of puberty including hormones, menstruation etc can be dealt with in what might feel like a more safe environment.
Thoughts?

OP posts:
frenchonion · 14/06/2019 17:40

I'd love to send my DD to a single sex secondary. I've worked extensively in a mixed sex comp, and as much as I'd like to dispute the stereotype, I've seen first hand time and time again the effect of male hijinx/dominance of the classroom, the hormonal aspect of developing teenagers in a mixed educational setting, stereotype play and out and out sexual harassment in some cases etc. A single sex cohort really appeals to me for my DD...I want to explain why but I'm not as eloquent as others, but a lot of which has been coverered by PP who favour single sex schools. Unfortunately there is no provision for this in my area, and I'm limited again by the fact my DC attend Welsh language schools which rules out single sex as an option pretty much altogether. I'm also fairly convinced my boys would do better too in single sex classes where there would be reduced opportunity for hormone driven posturing in the classroom, although I would highly advocate mixed sex socialising and clubs.

frenchonion · 14/06/2019 17:44

Sorry, I think I could have done better in that post. I think both sexes would benefit from educational settings where gender stereotypes are completely off the table and certain behaviours would be quieted by removal of hormone driven m/f interaction, thus improving the learning and educational experience of both.

WhereAreWeNow · 14/06/2019 17:50

No. DD will have to deal with boys and men outside of school and when she goes on to university/world of work. Better to learn how to deal with them now.

anothernotherone · 14/06/2019 17:51

Yotam the "diamond model" sounds ideal. Balance is usually the ideal... Seperate lessons for those key years but mixed form time and breaks sounds just right.

I do think if people just socialised their children properly at home there's be no need for single sex schools - plenty of boys do behave properly, and the swaggering, posturing disruptive boys have been socialised to believe that boys behave a certain way at home and by their wider family - same often for girls who give way to boys etc. They often have pratish father's and misogynistic mothers... Can't legislate for that though!

ChattyLion · 14/06/2019 17:54

I like single sex schools at secondary level and I wish there were more of them so girls in particular don’t have to travel a long way away to get to them.
Also I wish fewer single sex schools came with specific religious entry requirements or ethos because actually I think all families whatever their faith or none, should be able to have the choice of a single sex education at secondary level.
It annoys me that quite a few girls’ schools locally have gone mixed at sixth form level, making fewer places for girls to do A-level in a single sex environment.

Fibbke · 14/06/2019 17:59

I think the diamond model is over rated personally

Biancadelrioisback · 14/06/2019 18:02

I went to an all girl's school and there were pros and cons. Although I obviously don't really know any difference!
I did miss socialising with boys though. I missed out on learning how to be friends with boys.
Now I feel I missed a key aspect of growing up.

kenandbarbie · 14/06/2019 18:03

I'd say no. I went to a girls school and was unprepared for dealing with sexism in the workplace.

Fibbke · 14/06/2019 18:04

I went to a girls school and was unprepared for dealing with sexism in the workplace

good

no girl should be prepared for sexism in the workplace

kenandbarbie · 14/06/2019 18:05

But it happens and that's the real world. I could have done with some experience and coping strategies.

deydododatdodontdeydo · 14/06/2019 18:07

There's an element of self selection to it as well.
There were disruptive and bullying girls at my mixed sex school.
They probably wouldn't be the ones going to an all girl's school, so you'd filter out the most undesirable girls as well as the boys.
I believe this is one of the reasons why private schools are better too.

MrsMiggins37 · 14/06/2019 18:10

I think it can be good for girls, and if I had a daughter I’d definitely consider it.

However I have boys and I really don’t think my boy would do well at all in an all boys’ school. He’s very studious, quiet, well behaved and has no time for disruptive idiots and carry on in class, which lets face it unless it’s changed since I was at school, is largely boys.

kenandbarbie · 14/06/2019 18:10

There are bullying and disrespectful girls at single sex and private schools!!!!

Fibbke · 14/06/2019 18:11

There can be ken but they are certainly dealt with very effectively, at dds school at least.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 14/06/2019 18:19

I went to an all girls school and my heart breaks when I hear more and more reports of the shit girls are having to deal with in schools today. I am so grateful I didn’t have that. I had friends who went to mixed sex schools and there was very much a difference in the conversations they were having in school compared to what I was having with classmates. Lots of focus on make up, skirts being as short as they could get away with, who was seeing who, who got how far with who, and I remember some silly games they played that involved boys sliding their hand up the girls leg/down her blouse and she had to tolerate it as high/low as possible or be called frigid Hmm I thought it horrible at the time and was so glad I wasn’t at that school.

I definitely think there is a benefit for girls in single sex education. No idea about boys. I have the option of single sex or mixed for my DSes. One already goes to mixed secondary. I think he would be just as happy in single sex. My preference for the second is mixed grammar and that’s entirely due to his personality. He definitely has better friendships with girls and struggles with boys.

Janleverton · 14/06/2019 18:46

Thinking about the mix of schools in my LEA at secondary:

5 s/s girls (inc 1 super selective)
4 s/s boys (inc 1 super selective)
7 mixed

Think am really lucky - had a total choice at secondary for dd and ds where realistic options we could get in to were of 2 girls and 3 mixed for dd and 2 boys and 3 mixed for ds.

Ds2 would prob suit a ss setting more than ds1 but I really do think that mixed schools are better for boys. Ds1’s school splits boys and girls for cookery, PE, textiles and DT as well as for drama and dance.

Girls though, if it’s a good school, don’t have any of the crap associated with sexism, no misogyny, no conception of STEM being for boys. Most sixth forms are mixed (all, I think, round here) so will see what difference that makes to dd next year. Bit of trepidation really.

roisinagusniamh · 14/06/2019 18:56

No, life is about mixing.
Single sex schools are damaging !

Juells · 14/06/2019 19:05

Single sex schools are damaging !

That's a very sweeping statement. They suit some people very well, I certainly don't think I was damaged. If anything I feel sorry for girls who've had to put up with the harassment that can occur in mixed sex schools.

TooStressyTooMessy · 14/06/2019 19:06

I definitely found them damaging.

MsTSwift · 14/06/2019 19:08

Anecdotally dd1 is thriving in single sex. Much freer away from the male gaze. Know there are pros and cons but for her it’s ideal. I had a lot of grim low level sexual stuff at my mixed comp that she just doesn’t have to contend with

TheAngryLlama · 14/06/2019 19:16

What a girls school gives you, in my experience,is a valuable counterweight to a culture which tells you that makes should be the centre of your existence. They simply don’t matter very much to you during that formative period. My dd will go all girls boarding in September.

TheAngryLlama · 14/06/2019 19:16

Makes? Males!

Goosefoot · 14/06/2019 19:23

As far as harassment, I suspect there are other changes that could have very strong effects, one like another poster said reducing social media, and another being smaller schools.

But overall, if they are well run, I do tend to favour single sex schools. I think up to about adolescence girls and boys tend to have different educational needs, and later there are different social needs. I tend to think it is usually least important for the last two or three years.

Any school that's poorly run will have problems though.

Awning10 · 14/06/2019 19:44

"No idea about boys" is not good in my opinion. I had friends from an all girls school who idolized boys and had no idea how to interact with them. Their boyfriend choices were awful.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 14/06/2019 19:46

No idea about boys" is not good in my opinion.

You’ve misunderstood this comment. I meant I have no idea if single sex education was better for boys than mixed.

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