Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Wagamama and gender neutral toilets

550 replies

TulipsTulipsTulips · 31/05/2019 20:55

40% of wagamama’s toilets will be gender neutral by September. The last thing I want to do when I go out for a meal is share the facilities with men. We are different and deserve privacy! How have women’s interests become such a low priority?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Treefloof · 02/06/2019 19:06

And because I cant edit previous post, one quick question to all those ladies who are just fine with sharing, why dont you already?
If theres no problem, nothing to fear then get on with it and go into the mens anytime you need the loo.

DecomposingComposers · 02/06/2019 19:13

Why would I go into the men's toilet? I use unisex toilets quite happily. Have to use accessable toilets often which are unisex anyway so just as well I'm ok with it I suppose.

Outanabout · 02/06/2019 19:16

....and....we're off!

NunoGoncalves · 02/06/2019 19:18

If theres no problem, nothing to fear then get on with it and go into the mens anytime you need the loo

That makes no sense whatsoever.

LassOfFyvie · 02/06/2019 19:18

one quick question to all those ladies who are just fine with sharing, why dont you already?

Because:-
Single occupancy isn't sharing;

The layout of men's toilets usually includes urinals which would be embarrassing for men and me;

The cubicles in men's loos presumably are also the same horrible gaps and flimsy partitions so no better than the women's.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 02/06/2019 19:21

It it is normalising ‘gender neutral’ (note nit ‘unisex’) facilities.

PCohle · 02/06/2019 19:28

Yep, I agree with everything Lass has said.
The scenarios are completely different.

To me refusing to recognise the difference between the two scenarios makes it seem like the real issue is a desire to condemn any policy aimed at trans inclusivity rather than a genuine desire to protect women.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 02/06/2019 19:36

They will ‘include’ trans in a heartbeat but how fast are they to ‘include’ disabled access - oh the excuses!
it’s too expensive, we don’t ‘need’ to put in a ramp, (aw what a shame)
the building is old so we can say it’s just not possible (oh dearie me)

Our residents committee have been fighting for years to get a ramp access to the block. We got a handrail - a wobbly bloody useless handrail.

And to get nappy changing or breastfeeding facilities - you’d think we were asking for gold plated dinosaurs.

PCohle · 02/06/2019 20:07

But lots of people suffering from hidden disabilities/illnesses have mentioned on this thread that they prefer the sort of individual toilets that Wagamama are providing.

I mean obviously the lack of disabled access to your block of flats is shit, but I'm really not sure what it has to do with Wagamama's provisions of toilets.

HumberElla · 02/06/2019 20:13

Single self contained cubicles are no good if you have a pram, or need to take a mixed bag of young children with you. I have very often wedged the pram in the open door of a stall while I went to the loo. At least in a single sex space, you can be sure of only being seen by other women using the neighbouring stalls.. I also take young DS and DD into the loo with me and we generally choose stalls next to each other. That way I can have privacy but keep a look out for each other.

I don’t want small single cubicles when I’m out with my kids.

I also don’t want to use a mixed sex space that men have unrestricted access to unchallenged. Hidden camera toilet footage is massive online.

whatnow123 · 02/06/2019 20:49

How do some of you survive on a plane? I assume you don't fly due to the gender neutral toilets.

HardofCleaning · 02/06/2019 21:03

one quick question to all those ladies who are just fine with sharing, why dont you already?

This is such a stupid question. Because I'm not a man and not allowed in a man's toilet. If men are OK with sharing with women does that give them the right to come into the ladies toilet. Whenever this topic comes up anyone who actually prefers unisex toilets gets totally dismissed.

user1486131602 · 02/06/2019 21:08

I personally, have no feelings one way or another about gender neutral toilets. But, I do wonder once everything has gone that way will I still be able to ask for a ladies toilet? Since we are all having to be PC when will the tide turn?

sackrifice · 02/06/2019 21:35

How do some of you survive on a plane? I assume you don't fly due to the gender neutral toilets.

Gosh that is exactly the same scenario. Who knew?

SirVixofVixHall · 02/06/2019 21:36

How do some of you survive on a plane ?
Honestly , how utterly lacking in empathy. I am glad that you have thus far had a life where you don’t live in fear of male violence, but that does not apply to all of us.
I have used a loo on a very long flight, because it was one single loo, within sight of staff and other passengers, and felt safe and secure. It isn’t pleasant using loos that men also use though, even if they do feel safe, because men wee everywhere. Sometimes, like on an aeroplane, there is not really any other option. This is not true of larger shops and restaurants. They should be able to provide safe, women only spaces, away from the men’s loos. Those spaces can be enclosed with sinks, or have sinks outside, but they should stay single sex .

HomeMadeMadness · 02/06/2019 21:49

I much prefer gender neutral toilets. Much easier when out and about with someone of the opposite gender who has a disability and needs the loo.

HumberElla · 02/06/2019 21:52

Your question feels rather unpleasant whatnow

Did you mean to sound so flippant and airily dismissive when there are women here who have described being physically attacked? Because that’s how it came across.

SirVixofVixHall · 02/06/2019 21:54

I have also struggled with small cubicles when out with a baby and a toddler, and had to leave the door ajar. I would not have been able to do this in mixed sex loos. I would have had to stay at home.
I feel really angry that I can’t sit in a restaurant, a restaurant happy to take my money, and let my 14 year old dd go the Ladies on her own.
There is a reason why we have always had sex segregated toilets.

katienana · 02/06/2019 21:55

Our local Zizzis has individual cubicles with a toilet and sink. But each one is labelled m or f. Why not just do that?

thenightsky · 02/06/2019 22:03

How do some of you survive on a plane ?

we go to the toilet after standing in a queue. A queue that is in full sight of other passengers and stewards who would see if some geezer pushed his way into the same cubicle at the same time we did (not that there's room for 2 people in one cubicle. Hmm

Michelleoftheresistance · 02/06/2019 22:12

Whenever this topic comes up anyone who actually prefers unisex toilets gets totally dismissed.

Because the situation facing us is not male, female and unisex provision, which would work for everyone (other than those purely and selfishly after validation at other people's expense)

It is unisex and that's it . You're getting totally dismissed because your enjoyment of unisex does not cater for women who can't and won't use such provision.

Campaign for a third space in addition, it's the solution pretty much we've pushed for from the start. Then you can unisex to your heart's content and not selfishly leave a large group of people with no provision at all.

paffuto · 03/06/2019 06:27

Campaign for a third space in addition, it's the solution pretty much we've pushed for from the start And as always after this suggestion, complete silence. Hmm

PCohle · 03/06/2019 06:54

“In making this move, we don’t want to infringe on others – for example by just rebranding the women’s bathroom as gender-neutral. Our plan is not to take spaces away from people,” Farquhar said. “Some restaurants may have only gender-neutral bathrooms; some might have one or two female-only ones in addition.”

Based on this quote from the guardian article this thread is based on it seems Wagamama are perfectly aware of the the ongoing desire for women's only bathrooms in addition to unisex provision. It therefore seems something of a mischaracterisation to claim that they are trying to "selfishly leave a large group of people with no provision at all."

I suspect the lack of response to Michelle's post may have something to do with it being posted at past 10pm on a Sunday night.

YouJustDoYou · 03/06/2019 07:00

I hate them mostly because penis-owners piss all over the place, and leave the seat up so I then have to touch the bloody thing to put it back down. I'm also extremely nervous around men due to past trauma and using an enclosed space when a man is in there isn't an option for me. I avoid them.