Update: identifying as non-binary for work award

[Somerville1234]

Can't find the old thread... but anyway, there's an award/opportunity at work, only for people who are LGBT+++. I don't remember all the categories but they included genderqueer, genderfluid and genderfree. Also K, which I'm reliably informed stands for kink lifestyle. I don't understand why someone would need a special thing at work for getting off on weeing and whips (?? I don't watch porn, I don't have a clue), but maybe I'm just old fashioned. Anyway, old fashioned or not, I'm gender free because I don't believe in gender. And I wanted the professional opportunity. (Forgive me for the vagueness - being careful because of doxxing.) And you lot were encouraging...

I ended up applying - which didn't involve saying how I met the criteria, just ticking that I did. And then I was perpexedly approached by my woke boss.
(WB "Erm... so you realise that this is for LGBT+++ employees, Somer?"
S "Yes."
WB "Erm...it was my understanding you're a straight woman...?"
S "I'm genderfree and-"
WB: "Really?"
S "Yes, and I think I need to remind you that the staff handbook recommends that no-one should assume anybody elses's gender."
WB: "Oh, terribly sorry about that.")

I then had a lovely meeting with HR where they were very keen to update my pronouns on the system. I told them that being gender free I require the box beside gender to be left empty, but that I can accept female pronouns because that's my biological sex. They were happy with this novel idea and to learn more about the difference between sex and gender. They young HR person didn't know they're not synonyms but he learns something new every day apparently.

And now... I've heard I'm shortlisted for the next round!
It's been announced to the whole company, and I've had a few bemused looks but no direct transphobia, I'm happy to report.
My longsuffering DH (works in same field) has been teased a bit for my gender identity but he's happy to suffer for the sake of my fight for equality.

It's why we're feminists.

And why we're genderfree!

Strikes a chord with me too.... I've never really felt like "a woman". And when I have dressed up and done girly stuff I've felt like I'm pretending.

The only times I really felt like "a woman" is through pregnancy and motherhood.

Even when I was pregnant and being a mum - I wouldn't say I felt feminine. I was relieved my female body was doing it's female functions - but, I didn't have a huge drive to be a mother, more an awareness that if I didn't have kids it'd be a sadness.

I did have a huge drive to be a mother. But it was a drive, I believe, that didn't come from some mysterious feminine personality or inherently womanly flowery traits but from my female body's need to make use of those eggs it was constantly producing.

One question when people think about wanting to be a mother. Would you say specifically mother or would parent be a synonym, which defaults to mother if you are female. After all many men want strongly to become parents too the feeling may not be hugely sex specific?

Apparently it's not possible to be gender free because as we live in a society where we ''still get gender imposed on us''

But there's this word 'identify as' isn't there, which gets rid of all the boring reality and logic based issues and 'gently guides' others into doing their social duty in validating you instead of saying triggering and hateful things like 'but that doesn't work'.

I identify as genderfree. End of issue. Pass the biscuits.

I don't know, @MIdgebabe. I wanted to experience being pregnant and breastfeeding which are specifically female experiences, as well as wanting to have a child.

Apparently it's not possible to be gender free because as we live in a society where we ''still get gender imposed on us

And as transwomen tend not to pass they are still treated as male.

I think it was the baby not the pregnancy that appealed to me, but that may be hindsight.. sick for 9 months. Baby nearly died at 41 weeks and then couldn’t latch.

ALso, the desire to experiance things that only one sex can do isn’t restricted to the sex that can do it ( unassisted pull ups are my dream)

SO those feelings might be evidence of humanity not femininity

unassisted pull ups are my dream

Don't mean to brag but I can do unassisted pull ups and I'm definitely female.

Ok ok. I was just bragging

Wow.

Wow, Furry. Do you have, like, really little lightweight legs or something?

Oh, I'm not asserting it as evidence of femininity. Just my own experience that I wanted children in an abstract theoretical sense, and I also wanted (if I could) to experience pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. Having a female body, I wanted to find out what it could do.

Don't mean to brag but I can do unassisted pull ups and I'm definitely female.

Sadly, my upper body strength is crap and always has been - this despite putting serious time in at the gym.

The reason why, when all the trans stuff started, that I’ve not called myself LGBTQ+++ has been because I have wanted to honour the personal and political struggles that gay and lesbian people have been through.

Stonewall incorporated me when they renamed and colonised feminism. I’m not “appropriating” anything, I’m just carrying on being me

This this this this.

I actually feel inspired to revisit my employee ID page at work and tick some more boxes on the diversity monitoring information.

WB "Erm...it was my understanding you're a straight woman...?"
S "I'm genderfree and-"
WB: "Really?"
S "Yes, and I think I need to remind you that the staff handbook recommends that no-one should assume anybody elses's gender."
WB: "Oh, terribly sorry about that.")

Hero!

If you do get to the next round, or even win, you should definitely decline your prize on the basis that the concept of winning reinforces Cisheteronormativity.

They will explode in a self contradictory puff of unicorn breath and rainbows. It would be checkwoke. Totally epic 

😂😂😂😂😂

The disturbing fact remains that the cult of identification is leading young women and girls to have double mastectimies and alter their hormones with synthetic drugs. This is not a benign response to puberty or gender roles, it's extraordinary and unprecedented.

I've never really felt like "a woman". And when I have dressed up and done girly stuff I've felt like I'm pretending.

Are you in my head?! I completely understand this.

I also agree with another poster who said even pregnancy and birth, extended breastfeeding and motherhood don't make me "feel like a woman". I just am a women doing these things. I find it almost impossible to understand how any human can "identify as" anything.

twitter.com/sinisterimages/status/1115703912760262659?s=19

It's all becoming absolutely foul on twitter.

Urgh those tweets. Have you ever listened to trans people?

Constantly. And then formed opinions based on listening to all sides and having a fucking grip on reality.

Trousering Twitter is a toilet, small mercies is that person has been on since 2012 and has 58 followers, so I'd say it's an (abusive sock?) account with limited reach.

Sinister Image @sinisterimages
Bristol-based artist, public sector 'do-gooder', snowflake, itinerant swimmer and lover. He/His

#transrightsarehumanrights

BristolJoined November 2012
32 Following
58 Followers

It makes me sad when I see preteens and teens starting to develop more physically - up till that point the girls are just as physical as the boys and then biology fucks women over. And then the patriarchy does.

Somer thank you for what you have done, and are doing. Is there anything we can do to help? I’ve been thinking about this from the perspective of a brown person.

As far as I know, “cisgender” was coined by a white middle class academic and has since been enthusiastically embraced by many (not all) white middle class people. They have every right to adopt it for themselves (of course) but not to impose it on others... which is what they insist on doing. I’ve never seen a GF person try to impose that label on another.

The mockery and silencing of GenderFree folk is epistemic violence.

#GenderFree